User:TheHumbucker/UnNews In Progress
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
edit More tornadoes hit Midwest, Mayans giggle
edit Local man drinks water during rainstorm, feels powerful
It was pouring rain outside, coming down at the rate of nearly an inch an hour. Puddles were forming where they never form, rivers were in the streets, basements were becoming swimming pools. Everywhere, the rain was putting on an impressive show of force; no storm drain could keep up with it, no lawn would not drown at its onslaught.
But Nate Thompson was conducting a counterattack of his own by pouring himself a glass of water, going out on his enclosed porch, and drinking it.
"I was really showing that stuff who's boss," Thompson said, "I was telling it You can take my lawn and my basement, pound on my roof and wash my car, but you can't stop me from drinking you right down."