User:Strangeman70/UnNews:Strangeman's report on newfound alternate reality
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Strangeman70/UnNews:Strangeman's report on newfound alternate reality
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, July 5, 2015, 03:41:UTC)(
3 January 2011
alternate reality found, strangeman70 reporting new york, australia -- in the alternate town of new york, australia, there is gunfie and mortar explosions, this is the location of the united states of our reality's base camp where our army has come to liberate the alternate reality from the tyrannical rule of its dictator. the orer to invade was made just minutes after hearing the news that the alternate reality was completely powered by nuclear fission, and therefore had uranium stockpiles in the thousands of tons. (on an unrelated note this news also said that they have compltely untapped oil reserves) after hearing the news of the uranium, the entirety of the US government simultaniously went cha-CHING with fear an anger, held a conferene with the heads of the military (and for some reson, the OPEC chairman)after which they decided it would be best to pre-emptively strike th alternate reality and secure the freedom (and assets) of the alternate people.