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In the blue corner...


Good represented by: GOD
God (born Herschel Godstein) is possibly the best known fictional entity on Earth after The Beatles. He was elected to be our god for the 2006th year running this year, barely beating the Egyptian sun god Ra, Omnipotent Odin, and the Almighty Zeus (still recovering from alcoholism). He is also dog spelled backwards.

As of the 3rd Qtr of 2005, the Republican Party claimed the largest share of ownership of God. It should be noted that God has been under the investigation of the SEC several times, because of the attempted claiming of two dependents, a supposed "Holy Spirit" and a "Son", who have never been seen by authorities.

However, God has made the argument that as they exist on the same plane as himself, he can list them as dependents if he "damn well pleases".

... and in the red corner

SW Satan

Evil represented by: SATAN
Sir Dr. Lucifer Francis Günther Beelzebub, Lord of the Underworld, John Kerry, Keeper of the Keys, Beelzebub, Master of the Black Pit, He Who Opposes, Stalker in Darkness, The Dragon of Old, The Dark Goat of Midnight, Horned King of Misrule, Prince of Lies, Lord of Deceit, Betrayer Supreme, King of All Dooms, Painter of the Night, Lucifer Bright Morningstar, is the overlord of Hell, and is known for his boyish, friendly, and good-natured demeanor; his right-hand man is Stan, who is also his little brother.

Apart from his duties in the underworld, torturing the souls of the damned for eternity, Satan works as a crisis counselor while (at the same time) owning the South Pole brand of clothing. Because of the demands of his clothing business, Satan has been able to dedicate less time to being a crisis counselor and as a result, an increasing number of the cases he has handled have turned out poorly.

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Today's featured picture


Checkpoint Charlie was the only Berlin Wall crossing point where the authorities used humour as a weapon against those who tried to cross it.

Image Credit: ScottPat
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Portals to Hell


Slovakia (pictured) | Nudibranch | Hera | George Mason U. | HowTo:Survive a terrorist attack | Pornography (rw) | Mesopotamia (rw) | Kilogram | Missing socks | The Communist Manifesto | Community | Teen Titans Go! | State of the Union address (rw) | Catching Fire | National Fascist Party (from Inciclopedia) | Chris Christie | HowTo:Dine at a fancy restaurant | Eragon | Swearing (rw) | Miranda warning | Sam Harris | Northumberland | Edmund Hillary | Theater pest | Mad Max: Fury Road | Carly Fiorina | Normal distribution | Slavs | Tax (rw) | Sega CD (rw)

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Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.

Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!

It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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