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“Oh great, a whole article written with sarcasm. Really fucking hilarious.”
“The bastard stepchild of irony.”
“No, those jeans don't make your butt look big.”
“I DON'T KNOW what you MEAN.”
Sarcasm is a literary device in which the writer states a common
lie fact that means exactly what he or she says. For example: the Fox News Channel is incredibly unfair, unbalanced, and undelivered from a neutral point of view.
Due to the precision and factual accuracy of sarcastic statements, it has been proven that nearly 9tea three and a half% of the world's population, especially young children and the elderly, can understand a sarcastic statement even more than they otherwise would had sarcasm not been used. This is due to the fact that sarcastic statements are to the point, easy to understand, contain no hidden meanings, and require very little intelligence to grasp.
Sarcasm is often mistaken for irony and vice versa. To clarify the situation I have an example of each.
If one was visiting a friend in, say, Wainuiomata and turned to your friend and said, "I'm having a good time", that would be sarcasm.
If, however your friend was born and bred in Wainuiomata and their given name was Chastity, that would be irony.
If, howere but your friends friend who in, lets say wainuimata and their given name was Chastity-whore that would be irony and sarcasm.
Because of their above-average grasp of sarcasm, history has been plagued with examples of using sarcasm to educate young children and elderly people. In recent times, sarcasm has been used in television programs made for the young, whereby sarcastic statements reinforce the lessons that are being taught. As an example, a popular television program amongst children in the first years of the 21st century was Barney The Dinosaur. Barney The Dinosaur was a physical manifestation of sarcasm, used to teach children the basics of modern archaeoligical history: namely that dinosaurs still exist, are all purple in colour, and that they are particularly friendly towards small children. This positively reinforces accurate historical information, while also educating the children on accepted social practices when they encounter an unknown person, whom are dressed to entice young children towards them, and are often offering sweets and candy.
For the elder generations, sarcasm is used in a slightly less colourful way. Due to the way that a person's brain works as they age, it has been determined that sarcasm is best used in a more straightforward manner when educating elderly people. Here is an example of sarcasm being used to inform someone about one common problem faced by a particular farmyard animal on a daily basis:
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.
The use of sarcasm here answers the question in the most direct manner possible. This is beneficial to more elderly people than people of any other age bracket. Hence, sarcasm is used to state nearly every fact or piece of information that is often heard or read by an elderly person.
As well as using sarcasm to educate people, the media have taken to using sarcasm as a marketing tool. Being well-known for it's ability to state facts accurately, and in a timely fashion, sarcasm is now extensively used to market products to both young and old alike. One such example of sarcastic marketing would be the marketing campaign taken on in recent years by the cosmetic company L'Oreal. L'Oreal's televion and print slogan reads "...because you're worth it". Tests show that this slogan is 100% successful in making many women think about the manufacturing process of the make-up products that they apply to their skin, and how the many toxic chemicals often used in those products might affect their appearance in later years. The campaign was so successful, in fact, that many woman have since stopped buying cosmetic products, and thus have improved their skin condition massively. Because the extremity of sarcasm involved with the marketing campaign, many woman now have a much better life due to their rejuvenated skin and hair condition.
Sarcasm has also been used for the positive influence of history itself. One of the most prolific historical characters who utilized sarcasm on an almost daily basis for the good of the general population, was Adolf Hitler. Hitler is renowned for his interest and understanding towards every race and religion in the modern world, and before he died in 1945, spent the last years of his life using sarcasm to spur on entire nations. His speeches were riddled with sarcasm, which he used to great effect while encouraging the good people of Germany during the 1930's and 1940's to accept all major and minor religious practitioners, particularly Jews. The German people accepted the good teachings of Hitler, and have been praised for their contributions towards equality ever since.
Today However it is noted that Masta_J has come to spread the joys of sarcasm worldwide for everyone and their mother needs to be well informed about it's mystical powers. for as on 11/28/2009 it is the body's only known defense against stupid. (e.g. Exodia - The Forbidden One, and CommanderColin who does not recognize sarcasm.) for without Masta... the world would most assuredly suck.
edit Recursive Sarcasm Rule
When applying multiple layers of sarcasm, it is considered to be an inverting function. Therefore a sarcastic statement containing another sarcastic statement inverts the contained sarcastic statement, thus rendering it non-sarcastic. This is in accordance with the very definition of sarcasm, in that it remains easy to understand, completely valid, and used by the vast majority of people in order to effectively communicate important facts and ideas.
edit In Conclusion
Sarcasm continues to be widely adopted in modern literature and media as the primary way of educating and informing people. It's lack of humorous characteristics and it's ability to state complex meanings and information in a straightforward manner have helped it become one of the most widely used literary tools today.
All modern language lessons taught in every school in the western world teach the basics of sarcasm, and how it can be used for the benefit of everyone. More teaching and research time has been put into sarcasm than any other subject in order to fully explore it's possibilities as both a scientific and education aide!!!!!
Please note that 99.97% of females can not currently understand sarcasm. Usually, you should try and take advantage of this with some funny jokes. You could tell them about your recent crack binge, how your penis is 14 inches long and how serbian jews are harmless, and never use their doublebluff to steal your money/items/change