User:Shabidoo/happymonkeycompetition/2011/Dexter

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Happy Monkey Competition Winter 2011

Pee reviews for: Dexter

Article:

Pee Review from Shabidoo

Humo(u)r: 3/10

There are funny moments. Since its a work in progress Ill just tell you the parts that made me laugh: Advanced robotics. Trouble functioning in society. Unabomber killing corporate robots.

Creativity: 3/10

Im not sure where you are going with it so I cant give you much more for creativity.

Images: 0/10

No images.

Prose, Formatting, Links: 4/5

For what you did write, there are links, good separation of ideas and good prose.

Concept or whatever you want to put here: 1/5

I don't know what your concept is or where you are going. Even in such a text I should be able to have an idea, im left with guessing "the juxtaposition of modern global problems with old religious revolution" but Im not sure, and with such little text it doesn't have to be clear as it is a work in progress.

Final Score: 11/40

Sorry, but nothing intuitively jumped out at me to suggest for the article, but ofcourse just, good luck incorporating those two elements in an article, it will be smaking helarious if you pull it off.

Comments:

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Pee Review from: Magic man

Humo(u)r: 7/10

I find this quite humorous, but more in an "Lol wut?" kinda way than a "Oh that's clever!" sort of way.

I find that there's not much I can tell you on how to make it better, seeing as I really didn't understand the article.

I will however say that I found the silliness of the whole thing quite funny. But that can only take you so far.

Creativity: 7/10

I found all the links, analogies and euphemisms to be quite creative, so... Yeah...

Images: 0/10

Sorry, gotta give you a zero here. You ain't got any!

As for getting some, there is some funny stuff here.

Prose, Formatting, Links: 4.5/5

I really suck at written grammar, spelling and the like. But I figured it couldn't be perfect, and it looked fine to me, so... Four point five.

Concept or whatever you want to put here: 2/5

Er... I really don't know what it is. I'm sure it's hilarious, but I can't find it. So... You may want to make it more obvious.

Final Score: 20.5/40

I really enjoyed this article, but you obviously didn't get to finish it. I think you should make the whole point more obvious. Because it looks like me and Shabidoo didn't get it.

Comments:

{{{Comments}}}

Monkeyjudge

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