User:Secret Agent/Barack Hussein Obama

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“White people are idiots who cling to guns and useless faith in Jesus. All faith belongs to the government and then Allah.”
“We all must take a role in the American government. The middle class and lower are peasants who will worship me. Wall Street fat cats who support me will be rich.”
“It is important to be frugal during the recession. We must all give some to be successful. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll blow off everything I said and buy Michelle a 5,000 dollar pair of earrings.”
“I hate Christians, white people, Jesus, black conservatives, and those who don't want me to run a totalitarian government.”
“Anyone who doesn't agree with my health care plan must not like the rationing and lack of care caused by government inefficiency. How can you not care about the rich?”
“I am a Marxist.”
“He's not Robin Hood. He wants to give to the rich by stealing from the poor.”
~ Real Americans
“I love rich people. Bush tax cuts actually helped small business. Let's get rid of those”
Barack HUSSEIN Obama II, born in Northwestern Kenya[1] on the fourth of August in 1961[2] in a mosque. He is an inherent Muslim bent on destroying the traditional values of America. Obama is a closet Marxist using tactics of "hope and change" to try to recruit liberal idiots to his big agenda. Fox News cites Obama as being an evil leader and planning to turn our republic to the United Socialist States of America and eventually into the Soviet Union.
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The faux patriot snake handlers at Conservapedia have an even funnier article about Obama.

Vice-President Joe Biden also has a liberal plan to indoctrinate the American people by paying Press Secretary Robert Gibbs to support Obama's agenda of making the middle class poor peasants, in a reverse Robin Hood-esque plot. Reagan would never put up with it, and we must take a stand against this evil Marxist.

Early Life

Obama was born on an unspecified date in a mosque in Kenya to a rather odd father, and a mother who is a complete idiot. He was raised by communist relatives who taught him you can live off the fruit of rich people since it is government's job to redistribute the wealth. He also loved his Game Boy more than his mommy, so that must say something about his character.

College "Education"

After high school, he attended Occidental College to study Marxism. He had a buddy there who was a rich peasant, and Obama mooched off him and had a taste of the good life. This guy then moved away and Obama was poor and whiny. He transferred to Columbia University in 1981 so he could have a money supply and he then got his degree in Marxist Thought. He then worked for the EVIL ACORN and did community organizing to get liberal Democrats in office.

  1. Some liberal idiots like to think he was born in Hawaii. They lie. God said so.
  2. Or not. He has no real birth certificate
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