“Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! .. Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!”
~ Monty Python on the Killer Joke translated into German for safety measures.
“We're not just going to visit it, we're going to put Yorkshire on the Moon.”
~ The Now Show on British 21st Century colonisation.
“It's one small step for a chap. An awfully big leap for chapkind.”
~ The Now Show on The British Moon Landings.
Hello, welcome to ScottPat's User Page. ScottPat joined as a user on 31st March 2013. ScottPat is currently Chief editor of UnSignpost so please talk to ScottPat about UnSignpost on ScottPat's talk page. ScottPat is English, Scottish and Manx. To sum up ScottPat in six phrases ScottPat would say:
Has knowledge and writes articles about History, Politics and Science
I try to come on uncyclopedia every week and when I am on uncyclopedia I spend most of my time writing articles.
I've hung out round the Pee Review area trying to review people's work (mainly so that someone may bother to review mine). I also hang around the VFH page which I like doing and the VFD page which I don't enjoy as much.
Quotes that will help you get through life (from my articles)
“To think outside the box is to realise the box is too small for you to put everything in.”
~ Professional boxer Leon Spinks on boxes
“Before Alamein we never won a bloody thing. Well apart from the battle of the River Plate, the Madagascan War, sinking the Bismark, the Battle of Britain and the attack on Mers Al Kebir. After Alamein we never had a defeat, apart from Operation Epsom, Antwerp, the Burmese Campaign...forget it I'll write a shorter speech.”
“Panzer Division is easy - just cut panzer in half with chain saw”
~ Polish Proverb.
“We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Western Australia, we shall fight on the Great Barrier Reef and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength on Aires Rock, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight in the desert, we shall fight on the Emu nesting grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this Island or a large part of it were subjugated and starving to the evil Emu cause, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the Australian Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, all the bloody Emus will die.”
~ Winston Churchill's famous speech on the Emu War.
“How the hell did those Canadians invade. There's a sea between Canadia and America.”
~ George Bush speaking on the War of 1812.
“I told you Iraq had secret weapons of mass destruction.”
~ Tony Blair's first remark on the BP oil Spill.
“Well, Iraq's still basically part of Britain.”
~ Tony Blair's second remark on the BP oil spill after being told that BP was a British company.
“Stage Manager: This is the graveyard in the Mormon cemetary on Bunker's hill. We got ancient graves here, going right back to the fifteenth Century. Up there's the Patriots' graves of 1776. They're coated with gold and topped with a giant cross. A few loyalist bodies were found kicking around the bottom of that ditch down there. So we dug 'em up and gave 'em a proper burial - in the Catholic graveyard. Hahahaha. Made us boys laugh for weeks.”
~ Thornton Wilder
“George Gibbs: But you don't actual believe in this whole marriage affair, do you Mr. Webb?
Mr. Webb: Well to be honest with you George I do but you see in our Jedi way we believe that marriage is the interconnection of two masters to produce a suitable padiwan so that one day we must find the chosen one.
Mitt Romney: Speaking from the Mormon point of view, Mr. Webb if you don't mind, I always say it ain't natural to go through life bein' lonely. People are born to go through life four by four, or is it six by six?”
~ Thornton Wilder
“If we were to take the number of every piece of sand on every beach on Earth and multiply it by the number of every star in every galaxy in every cluster in every super cluster of our universe, then that number. That golden ratio of numbers would not be enough to equal the probability that this theory is correct.”
British/Scottish/English humour. Historical, geographical and political jokes. Parodies. Satire about bad people. Well written/ knowlegeble. If I like an article then I most probably would write it down on my user page.
Type of Article I Hate
Not funny. Rude - Swearing. Stupid, overly made-up and ridiculous facts. If I hate an article I may get angry.