User:Saddex/America

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“I have no further use for America. I wouldn't go back there if Jesus Christ was President”
~ Charlie Chaplin on America
“The whole world is watching America, and America is watching TV”
~ Captain Obvious on America
USA
The Uncycled States of Amurica
McDonaldland
Flag Coat of Arms
Motto: I'm lovin' it.
Anthem: Sweet Home Alabama
America's greatest cartographers, Roy Rogers and Wendy King-McDonald, produced this definitive map of America.
Capital Washing-tonnes
Previous capital Hollywood
Largest city Guantanamo Bay
Official language(s) 'Murica Launguage, fat english
Government Democratorship, Obamitolium
‑ Emperor Barack Obama
National Hero(es) Lil' Wayne, Mitt Romney, George W. Bush, OJ Simpson, Ronald Mcdonald
Established During a small teaparty in Boston
Currency Coca Cola
Religion Dollarism, libert-ism
Major exports KFC, Wal★Mart, McDonald's, Kitten Huffing, Carbon dioxide
Major imports Oil, Mexican immigrants, Terrorists, Made in China, Barack Obama

America, also known as USA, McDonaldland, Amurica etc, is the name of a previous country, which was located north of Mexico and south of Canada.

edit History

The country used to be inhabited by Indian immigrants, who lived nomad lifes. When politicians of other nationalities found out that this area was perfect for creating fast-food ingriedients, they sent forces in order to colonize America, this was in 1878. After a couple of years, America was inhabited by people from all ethnic groups, and the cultures of those groups soon merged and evolved into an entire new culture.

Unfortunately, cultures wasn't the only thing that merged together. New dangerous diseases and infections originated from this ethnic mixture. In 1929, a deadly parasite, known as Moneyis Capitalisis, started to spread rapidly in the country. This parasite killed many Americans, however, thanks to efforts from the American government, the people could calm down in 1933, as the parasite went extinct (Or at least they thought that). The calm didn't even last in 30 years, until a breakout occured in 1962 of a mutated, extremely dangerous form of the original parasite, which originated in bodies affected by large amounts of radiation. The situation soon became critical. The new parasite, known as Moneyis Walmartesis, soon spread all over America, and millions of Americans were killed by it.

The situation soon became so critical, that the rest of the world agreed to put America in quarantine, by sending the country to the Moon. The Russians wanted to land on the moon first, but they were to late. The plan to send off America was executed before the russians even were done manufacturing their Moon Rocket.

America to space

America taking off from the Cape Canaveral space center.

The plan was executed at the 16th of june, 1969. Four days later, America was grounded successfully on the surface of the moon. A man named Neil Armstrong became the hero of the trip, by a reason that's still not fully known today.
America Moon

America, as seen today.

Although on the moon, America continues to have influence over the rest of the world even today, as proved by the increasing world obesity and corruption. Scientists are still researching the reason to this, while an average person easily can figure that out. The fact that the country landed at the front side of the moon tells why the world influence the country has still is high today.

edit Politics

America is a democratorship. That status means that the state mostly works as a democracy, with the minor exceptions that the government is allowed to spy on you over the internet, you can get arrested for telling offensive jokes or yelling swear words over the phone while calling the emergency number, and the government will hunt you down and arrest you for a lifetime (and most likely use torture on you) if you tell inconvenient truths about it. Election fraud is also very common. One notable example happened in year 2000, when George W. Bush earned the power, even if the competitor Al Gore had more votes. Overall, America is the country where fascism and liberty, two elements completely different of each other, have been combined in a such successful way, that the obvious fascist dictatorship has been completely masked to a well working democracy.

edit Religion

When America was declared independent from the United Kingdom, the founding fathers attempted to constitute an amendment in the constitution, actually the first of them all, where religious freedom was held gold. The authorities and the government weren't allowed to promote any religion over others. That attempt failed miserably however, as the first amendment almost always was ignored, under the argument that the majority of the American population were Christians, and if the majority isn't controlling a country, it is logically not a democracy. The constitution has, over the centuries, been progressively rewritten on the sly by conservative governments, until the amendments in it became identical to the ten commandments found inside the Bible.

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