User:Romaioktonos/Luka Megurine

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“I should have enlisted the Makedones in the battle of Asculum...”
~ Pyrrhos Aiakides
“YAY I have a Epeirote cousin! >u<”
~ Hatsune Miku
Megurine Luka
Luka, being a good general by taking care of a Psilos
Basileus Epeiroton
Assumed position
March 14, 2006
Preceded by None
Place of Residency Ambrakia
Born (Really Created) Jaunary 30, 1989 at Epidamnos
Birth name Pyrre Nikator Romaioktonos Keltoktonos Poliorketes Aiakides
Nationality Epeirotes
Political party Join Epeiros or be kicked in the well Party
Affiliation Arche Epeirotike
Spouse None
Children None, seriously, Vocaloids are asexual!
Profession Strategos, Nikator, Mercenary Magnet, Gynaikonomoktonos
Religion Protestant

Luka Pyrrhos Epeirotes Romaioktonos Keltoktonos Philomisthophoros Nikator Aiakides Megurine (January 30, 1989 - ), known to the Europa Barbarorum players as Pyrrhos Aiakides and to intermediate students of Greek history as Pyrrhos of Epeiros, is the incumbent Basileus of Epeiros. Luka, out of the Hellenic rulers, have the longest reign out of them all, beating Alexandros III and all of the Diadochoi in terms of length of reign. At one time, Luka is at war with Sailor Mars, whose army of pyromaniacs, phalangitai, and tanks are held back by Luka's phalangitai, fish merchants, and mechanized octopi. Luka had a successful military career, although due to its length it looks much duller than that of Sailor Mars or Hatsune Miku, although many military scholars hold that Luka's military career was more impressive than that of Sailor Mars as most of the territorial conquests were against the Siberians, who had very primitive equipment. Similarly, some hold that same can be held true for Luka, who gobbled up most of sub-Saharan Africa (considering that most are poor, although the pro-Luka historians claim that there are more militant and ready groups, such as the Tuaregs). Luka now owns most of Italy, except for the Papal State which is protected by Sailor Mars' Makedonia. Luka is now engaged in the World War IV against Sailor Mars, which isn't going too well as her chief allies, the Ptolemaioi under E Ptolemaios VIII Euergetes Honda and Minami Hikarine's Basileia Bosphoron fell to Sailor Mar's Makedonia.

Luka is currently in the 5th place in the poll for the most successful military conquerors, right behind Sailor Mars much to her chagrin. Luka currently owns all of the Western Hemisphere, as well as most of Western Europe and most of Africa (except Aigyptos, which was owned by Sailor Mars, now owned by the Ptolemaioi Liberation Army under Yuki Nagato).

edit Basileus of Molossis

Luka was the brainchild of Aiakides, who was said to have descended from Neoptolemos himself, who was in turn the son of Achilleus. Unlike most other earlier Vocaloids who often were of the Argead Dynasty, Luka's different heritage is reflected in Luka's attires: the golden curls were actually designed to emulate the circulatory systems of the oak in Dodone, and the jewel was to represent the heritage to Neoptolemos, who was killed by Orestes in Delphoi. Aiakides however was overthrown from power by the invading Illyrioi, and Luka ended up surviving in the wilderness until one of the Illyrian kings take Luka in, and places her as the Basileus of Molossis, one of the northwestern region of the Balkans.

Molossis was a region of rolling mountains and plains, making cavalry widely accessible. Chaonia, the neighboring region to the north, was another important region, and there was the region in which the phalangitai would be recruited. Here, the Chaonians were also ravaged by the Illyrioi (explaining the rivalry between Mio and Lily), and after the unification of southern Illyrian tribes along with the Chaonians into the Epeirote Kingdom, Luka established herself as the uncontested ruler of Epeiros.

edit Campaigns with Megas Alexandros

Luka, although a completely independent ruler of a completely independent kingdom, had always maintained close ties with the Makedonians, at least when Miku was the Basileus Makedonon. Luka was responsible for most of the Hypaspistai that Miku fielded in many of the campaigns, and were critical in the campaigns against the Persai and the Britannians, although many of them being used to eating fish complained that Miku fed them too much green onions. As a result, Luka's kingdom didn't experience much wars in the early periods of the Hellenistic Period, save for the war against the Romaioi under the powerless Chuck Norris. Luka, with Miku's Makedonian allies, met at Asculum, where the pathetic "god" Chuck Norris hurled a piece of styrofoam disguised as a rock against Miku to no avail. No lives of soldiers were lost, and Luka left Italy in boredom back to Epeiros, where Luka would get Meiko, an Agrianian, and later on, Lily, a half-blooded Makedonian (mixed with Illyrian stock), who would play a major role in the defense of Epeiros against Lelouch and later on Sailor Mars.

590px-Pyrrhic War Italy
Pyrrhos Luka's campaign against the Romaioi, even though it was Miku's Makedones who did almost all the work
Luka had so much in common with Pyrrhos... In fact, she always end up wearing a stone mask of Pyrrhos in every halloween.

edit Defense of Epeiros against Lelouch

At the time of Lelouch's invasion of Makedonia in the Hellenistic-Britannian War, Lelouch hoped to invade Epeiros as a way to surround Pella, as well as circumvent the more fortified positions in the northern borders of Makedonia. Lelouch did successfully capture Ambrakia and Epidamnos, and this was a source of distress for Luka. Lelouch made a mistake of letting the Romaioi be in charge of the garrison at Ambrakia, which led to the destruction of the Dodone while some of the Romaioi played with fire and hoes, which sparked massive uprising in Ambrakia, which Luka took advantage of, and along with a special force led by Lily, successfully recovered Ambrakia. Lelouch, incensed, commanded his army to retake Ambrakia, although they were intercepted in Pella and were routed by Sudo.

edit After Miku's retirement

Because Luka was not one of the somatophylakes and thus not a Diadochos of Miku, although in every other sense Luka would have been considered one, Luka largely was able to avoid the divisive war in the first Diadochoi Wars pitting the official Somatophylakes against Sailor Mercury, the self-proclaimed ruler and the appointed regent of Miku's empire. Of course, this also was a time for Luka to build strength, which would be used well in the invasion of Makedonia while Shirley was Basileus.

edit Diadochoi Wars

“This... is... Epeiros!”
~ Megurine Luka on Capture of Pella
“This... is... Sparta!”
~ Roy Mustang on Luka's involvement in Mustang War
“This... is... well... what should I say? LIBERTY FROM LEN KILLERS!”
~ Tei Sukone on All Vocaloids
“Enough with the THIS IS SPARTA joke! This... Is... MADNESS!!!”
~ Persian Emissary on All the quotes above

Luka became much more ambitious as the Diadochoi were seemingly squandering their power against themselves. As Momo Momone's Antigonid Kingdom of Pergamon was promising Lebensraum and peaches to the farmers, Lysimachos and Kassandros was holding off the powerful and popular army of the Antigonids under Antigonos Monopthalmos. After Momo was taken down in the Battle of Ipsos, Shirley was poised to be the great power after Teto united the Kingdom of Pergamon with the Kingdom of Makedonia, although because Teto was the heir to Momo the Anatolian territory of the united nation was lost to Rin, the leader of the Seleukidai. Luka intervened with the support of XP-Tan, who distracted the Makedonian troops in Hellas making the northern Makedonia more vulnerable to Luka. Shirley Fenette was extremely unpopular, and an entire army joined Luka when Shirley ordered an attack on the Epeirote army. Luka captured Pella, and left the Keltoi in charge of the garrison of Pella, who sacked Aigai. Luka was very disappointed, as Luka committed the same mistake as Lelouch did when Lelouch invaded Epeiros. However, the Makedones were largely weakened, allowing Rin and the Seleukidoi to capture much of eastern part of Asia Minor, until Tifa Lockhart came in and established the Kingdom of Pontos, further expanding the multiculturalism of the region of Pontos by adding to it the cultures of the Uruk-Hai, borrowed from Saruman who lived next to Alexandros in 0rthanc just next door to Persepolis. Luka also funded XP-Tan's expeditionary fleet which would easily win the loyalty of Mytilene.

Although Luka denies involvement in the First Lakedaimonian Wars, Luka's concerns about Tei probably is only natural since Tei Sukone wanted to get rid of Luka as well since Luka was one of Tei's enemies. Luka sent in Tsumugi with a bunch of Illyrioi Hippeis (much to Lily's chagrin) against Elis, and by extension, Sparte. Tei now had an excuse to invade Epeiros, but the problem was Epeiros wasn't the best target at the time, since Tei had to fight in the eastern Peloponnesos holding back XP-Tan's Chremonidean League, while also contending with the Aitoloi under Krateros and Achaioi under Aratos. To make things worse, the Makedones, although not ruled by a Vocaloid at the times, decided to intervene in hopes of gaining Korinthos.

edit World War IV

“Luka knows how to win a victory, but doesn't know how to use it”
~ Sailor Mars on Luka as if Sailor Mars was Antigonos Gonatas
“But You are not of the Antigonid Dynasty!”
~ Luka Megurine on Sailor Mars
“Yeah... But so what? Does it matter?”
~ Sailor Mars on Luka Megurine

The age of the Diadochoi was reaching its nadir when Sailor Mars came into power, which immediately led to a tremendous change in power structure of the Hellenistic world. Meanwhile, while the Makedonian attention was focused on the Ptolemaioi, Luka conquered Britannian and most of western and central Europe, bringing them into the Hellenistic fold (and decreasing the need for prostitution, as well as natural reproduction when Luka introduced artificial fertilization and asexual reproduction). After Sailor Mars conquered what is pretty much the Alexandrian empire (plus the Papal State), the attention was shifted to Kypros and Epeiros. Kypros surrendered to Sailor Mars when she sent a fleet of Poliremeis and blockaded the port, which Sailor Mars followed by a massive castration of all people, as well as execution by burning at the stake the Ptolemaioi loyalists and Objectivists (although latter one got much harsher treatment).

The invasion of Epeiros was initiated in January 30, 2034, which was decided by Sailor Mars with the rationale that the Epeirotai would celebrate the birthday of their Basileus, and thus would be less ready to fight. To confirm that, Sailor Mars dispatched the spy Suzanne Vega posing as a guest singer with the song "Luka". However, Sailor Mars did not expect trenches and anti-tank walls that would slow down the troops, as well as draining their supplies. Sailor Mars feared that the invasion would fail as the supplies were getting low combined with the reports that the enemy was fully mobilized. Luka's main battle line consisted of the phalangitai much like Sailor Mars' army, although Luka supported the phalanx with armored mechanical octopi and some Yuki Nagato Klerouchoi who escaped from Makedonian occupied Delta Neilou.

Unfortunately, Luka let the dizzy successes get the best of her and decided to occupy Aigyptos, turning the PLA from an allied army to an enemy working with her mortal enemy when Sailor Mars took advantage of this and offered aid and a covenant not to invade Aigyptos (and respecting its independence as a implication). Yuki Nagato became a thorn in her spine when the Ptolemaic expedition routed a Epeirote fleet at Kos, disrupting supply flow in the Ionian front. Additionally, Luka also faced challenges from the Pan-Iberian movement in the Iberian Peninsula led by Ed Elric, and thus lost most of the gains in the Ionian front, as well as some land in the upper Balkans and Italy. Luka also failed to take Syrakousai and take control of Trinakrie, although Luka did take Messene and gained for herself a foothold in Trinakrie, supported by cities of Kroton and Taras (of which latter is lost to Sailor Mars). Luka handled the Iberians Alexandros style, sacking and exterminating/enslaving resisting population thus almost reserving a spot in the Phlegethon alongside Alexandros in the 7th level of the Inferno until Luka made amends for the atrocities by rebuilding cities and providing survivors with low-interest loans.

edit World Cup of 2038

Yes, even the Pope (although Sailor Mars was the real Pope) participated in this event.

Believe it or not, despite the fact that Europe, Asia and Africa was embroiled in a World War at that period, Both belligerants agreed to participate in a World Cup during which no military actions would be taken, hosted at Hierosolyma. Because of that, heat exhaustion was rampant, so both parties agreed to move the tournament up to Ambrakia as a part of the compromise, in which they agreed to hold the matches after the quarterfinals in Pella. In the round between 16 countries, Luka's country Epeiros was matched up with Argentina, Portugal and Spain, and with the superb field leadership of Field Marshal Mio Ambrakiaios, pwned Argentina 4-1 (Yui accidently tripped, and the ball slipped into the Epeirote goal), Portugal 7-0, and Spain 1-0. Meanwhile, Sailor Mars' Makedonia, whose ace was Parmenion, dominated Japan 8001-1337, and also defeated North Korea and Pontos (by the penalty kick array) by a large margin, which would have lead the North Korean team to be sent off to the coal mines, until Parmenion converted them and sent them off to Pella.

However, Epeiros and Makedonia finally found themselves in the final match, where things went as awry as it could: It started with yellow cards for both Field Marshals of the respective countries Parmenion and Mio Ambrakiaios, culminating in a red card for both of them. This resulted in the termination of the match, with both countries' players committing battery on the referees, driving them off of Pella. After that, the war was restored status ante quo, and the progenitor of the ordeal, Mio Ambrakiaios became a laughingstock due to this debacle.

edit After the World Cup

“Must pray to Satan!”
~ Epeiros Propagandist on Sailor Mar's portrayal
“Must pray to Satan!”
~ Amused Audience on Sailor Mar's portrayal in SMA parody

edit Rumors about Luka's supposed death

“God damn it! Come to Argos so I can give you a gift of bricks!”
~ A Grandmother of an Makedonian Soldier on Pyrrhos Aiakides
“Remember kids, Luka's power level is -5000 when pitted against old women with bricks.”
~ Vegeta

Luka, much like her cousin Megas Alexandros, planned to sneakily hide herself from the world in order to conquer it for Hellas. To do that, Luka presumably went to Argos (in reality, it was Azusa) to take it over, and was knocked out by a brick hurled by one of the resistors who lost a son to Luka, leaving Azusa knocked out. The Makedonians under Sailor Mars (it was still year 2040 then) believed that Luka Pyrrhos was dead, and returned news of supposed victory to Antigonos Doson, who exulted triumphantly.

edit Generals and notable figures under Luka

All of them, especially the one who looks like Mio, are prominent generals under Pyrrhos Aiakides Pyrrhus of Epirus Luka Megurine

edit Mio Akiyama

“I am the Strategos Basilikon... This is Epeiros! (cries)”
~ Mio Akiyama Ambrakiaios on Mikuru Asahina
“Epeiros? THIS IS MAKEDONIA!!!!!!!”
~ Mikuru Asahina on Mio Akiyama Ambrakiaios

Date of Service: October 28, 2022 -

Out of the Epeirote generals, Mio Akiyama Ambrakiaios is perhaps the most underappreciated of the bunch (while Lily being the most appreciated). Mio led the Epeirotai in the assault on most of Ionia, supported by Lily's Leistoi who always were looking for plunder. In fact, Mio often left cities unsacked, often because Mio didn't want to take on the ponderous job of sacking it, as the Lily and her Leistoi would do it and send the revenues directly to Ambrakia. Mio, like Luka, is an full-fledged Epeirotes and is proud of her nationality, even though culturally speaking they borrow heavily from the Hellenes. Mio largely takes charge of the Epeirote main line if Luka isn't there, as such gets to have the prestigious position of commanding the Chaonion Agema and the Molosson Agema, while Lily, her major rival, commands the irregulars and often seek plunder rather than glory.

Mio is most well known for slaying both imposters of Chuck Norris (who was killed by Miku) and Sparta Man. Mio also pwned Azu-nyan in a EB battle, where Mio commanded the PTOLEMAIOI while Azu-nyan commanded PONTOS. Tifa Lockhart therefore later challenged Mio to a EB match, not really surprising as Tifa Lockhart was the founder of the Basileia Pontike.

Mio, as a general, first served in the intervention in Syrakousai, where instability threatened to tear the city apart, or weaken it into a point where it would be vulnerable to occupation by the evil ROMAIOI. In fact, the hatred for the ROMAIOI was so great that even the symbasileis of Makedonia agreed to help quell the instability by sending Parmenion and the Lochos Hieros consisting of the 300 Blisseys. Mio won a victory at the ports of Kroton, where Mio would rout a Roman fleet, and was teased by Ritsu (includes mummified bunnies) at the town center as soon as the Roman fleet was routed (and Kroton holding a feast). It is said that Mio weighed over 9000 centigrams, although it does not sound too bad considering 45kg of it came from the chain mail.

Mio's next big step in her career was her subjugation of the Illyrioi, along with her eventual rival Lily who was a half-blooded Illyrios. Mio at that time was given the command of the Chaonion Agema, which fascinated Mio not only because of their morale but for the fact that they wanted to keep Mio's molesters out. It is noted that Mio gave them a new outfit much to their chagrin, which isn't surprising as Mio gave them school uniforms and flowers to wear, even though Chaonion Agema was 100% male like pretty much all the military organizations at that time. Of course, now the Chaonion Agema became the biggest body of molester wannabes.

Mio was one of the vanguards in the Hellenistic World War IV, in which Mio suggested the idea of the mines and other delaying mechanisms to hold back Sailor Mars' mighty juggernaught, and this gave Mio the position as the Field Marshal (Gk: Στρατηγος αντι Βασιλεος Ηπειροτων/Strategos anti Basileos Epeiroton). Mio made Epeiros a leading exporter of CAKE, maid suits and cute stuff, which includes plushies and screenshots. Mio, disliking the sight of blood, attempted to revive the World Cup to end the war, and did fairly well (kicked Argentinian butt by 4-1, Spain by 1-0, Portugal by 7-0) as the ace of the Epeiros. However, controversies occurred in the Epeiros vs Makedonia match, where the aces (and quite surprisingly the Field Marshals of the respective countries) always were being stopped by the referees (eventually both receiving a red card at the first half of the match) and this made the attempts at using soccer to end wars a source of ridicule in the future.

Mio is known to be a huge fan of Roma Surrectum II and Europa Barbarorum, mainly because of the lack of gore and barnacles.

edit Lily

“Shit... Megas Alexandros was dipped in the Plegethon... (sacks a city)”
~ Lily on her attitude to Dante's Inferno

Date of Service: May 11, 2016-

Perhaps the most well known of the Strategoi Epeiroton other than Luka herself, Lily is one of the newest Vocaloids and although incomplete (meaning that Lily doesn't get to command regular units, such as the pezhetairoi), still a deadly opponent as Lily commands the Leistoi, and in fact made Epeiros a pirate state much like the Aitolian League. Lily sacked so many cities that Luka gave up on attempting to preach to her, as Luka believes that Lily would end up in Phlegethon alongside Megas Alexandros, which would have been her own fate if it weren't for her payment of reparation and Hellenizing the Iberioi. Lily is often seen largely as a foil to Mio: Mio dislikes sacking cities and shedding blood for the most part, while Lily is not afraid of a little blood (which ends up being enough to fill the Phlegethon), and Mio leads the elites of the regular army while Lily commands the irregulars, particularly pirates.

It is noted that Lily is being trained as a commander of the regular units, which is still a work in progress. However, Lily has a problem not sacking cities, since Lily likes to share the booty with the pirates. Lily probably chose to command the light troops since Lily herself wears lightly, exposing most of her upper areas save for the breast, causing some to speculate that Lily was a Psilos before becoming a commander. Lily read Dante's Inferno, but noting from her continual love of sacking cities, probably skipped the canto in which Alexandros was reported to have been dipped in the river of boiling blood, whose to tal volume is approximately that of the amount of blood shed in Lily's sacking of cities. Lily, despite being a Illyrian hybrid, has hippophobia like Yuki Nagato and Parmenion, and thus had to be given infantry training much like Yuki and Parmenion. Because Lily is being trained to be a Hypaspistes, many enemies of Epeiros fear a rise of another hard-hitting heavy infantry corps.

Oh yeah, despite her attires Lily was not a Hetaira.

edit Tsumugi Kotobuki

Date of Service: July 4, 2022-

Tsumugi Kotobuki is one of the many minor Epeirote generals, far overshadowed by the two major Epeirote generals, Mio Ambrakiaios and Lily. Tsumugi however did succeed in holding a pass against Sailor Mars' juggernaught, and even held her ground against one of the most experienced generals in the Hellenistic world for some time. Tsumugi, like Mio, tended to stick to traditional way of combat, the pike phalanx. Tsumugi also intervened in Hellas, where Tsumugi fought against Roy Mustang in the Mustang War, where he declared Sparte independent of the Chremonidean League formed by XP-Tan, even though the records were so skimpy that that event was relatively obscure.

However, Tsumugi's real influence comes in the fact that her family is specifically supported by the state and is granted a monopoly on all private weapon production in Epeiros. Tsumugi's family built many Epeirote fortress all over Epeiros, most notably the fortress at Antigoneia at Chaionia, one of the main regions of Epeiros and the homeland of Mio. As such, Tsumugi's troops often are better armed than the majority of the Epeirote forces, although being privately armed not superior for state-funded forces in other states, such as Makedonia. Tsumugi personally created the Molosson Agema, recruited from the fellow Molossians from Molossis, her homeland. Tsumugi also owns the largest shipping fleet in all of Epeiros, and thus also serving as Epeiros' breadwinner of sorts. For all that economic achievements, Tsumugi doesn't have much of a military career, so nobody really cares for Tsumugi as a general. In the year 2030, the tax returns showed that Tsumugi's family paid 85% of all taxes (does not include duties and others) in all of Epeiros, but still, that is quite something.

There are good number of evidence that Tsumugi made her money by trading Yaoi and Yuri stuff with the Achaioi under Konata. Also, Tsumugi manufactures 9001 tons of cake every year, most of them to be accrued by Yui. Tsumugi also maintains a good relationship with Ui, who came up with the idea of the Loukoumades cake. Tsumugi and Ui holds an festival every easter, roasting 9001 Lambs on Spits that attracts about 35,000 people, including tourists from Mainland Hellas.

edit Azusa Nakano Aiakides

Date of Service: November 11, 2025-

Azusa, more well-known as Azu-nyan by the Iaponikoi and Yui, is a minor general of Epeiros. Azusa had some military experience before actually serving as a general, something that is uncommon (although with other exceptions, such as Tsumugi). Azusa was initially uninterested in serving as a general, since her experience as a captain wasn't the best that an career in the army had to offer. However, all changed when Azusa challenged Mio into a EB match, where Azusa playing as PONTOS was easily owned by Mio who played as the PTOLEMAIOI. Azusa then felt like being together with Mio for a Yuri manga (something that Tsumugi approves, since Tsumugi was the head of the economics). Despite being one of the Aiakidai much like Luka, Azusa has black twintails, something that others view as a surprise.

Preceded by:
King of Makedon
Succeeded by:

Preceded by:
Lysimachos and Demetrios Poliorketes
King of Makedon
Succeeded by:
Lysimachos and Demetrios Poliorketes

Preceded by:
King of Epeiros
Succeeded by:

Preceded by:
King of Epeiros
Succeeded by:

Preceded by:
Megas Alexandros
Hegemon of the Axis of Good
Succeeded by:
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