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If at first you don't succeed, watch someone else fail. You won't feel as bad.
Never confuse a money making scheme with a monkey mating machine.
Consteratism is not a world view. In fact, it is not even a word.
The secret of happiness is a life of love. DON'T TELL ANYONE!
There is no problem which cannot be solved by a liberal application of violence.
For the sake of the people, never neglect the time-honored tradition of the fermentation of rice.
There is no known cure for the common fool.
An important precaution to take when keeping an open mind is taking steps to prevent your brain from falling out.
Never base a joke on birds.