From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Thaiflag JAA
Flag Coat of Arms
Motto: "Hucky Sucky, 12 dollar."
Anthem: "Boys like girls are like boys are like girls"
Make one later - Note to self
Capital Bangkok
Official language(s) Thai, Mai Thai
Government Constitutional Dictatorship brought to you in part by the Monarchy
King King Bhumibol Adulyadej
National Hero(es) Lady boys of Bangkok, Conan and Professor Snape
 of Independence
To be announced some date in the future
Currency Dongs
Religion Transgenderism
Major exports Brides, Lady boys, Beaches and a tonne of weed
Major imports Gary Glitter, Sex offenders and Pre-murder victims
“I lost my virginity in Bangkok.”
~ Oscar Wilde on generic Oscar Wilde quote
“The girls have dicks.”
~ Captain obvious on Thailand

Thailand located somewhere near China and Indonesia is the most favoured holiday destination of the western world. Famed for it's cinematic productions at Thaiwood; it's Lady Boys of Bangkok and it's green yet strangely spicy and exotic food. Thailand is a major hit with gap year students, sex tourists and drug runners.

edit Early Days

Founded in 1946 by King Ranma ½ of the great kingdom of Siam; following his messy divorce from Anna. Thailand grew to prominence as a centre of trade for western nations who were able to indirectly supply arms to the Vietcong without the French finding out.

During the Vietnam war where America waded in to help the French, only late as usual, as the Frenchies had surrendered 5 years earlier. Thailand assisted the Americans by allowing them to station airbases and military bases in exchange for Elvis CD's. Cambodia didn't like this and declared war on Thailand, but because Cambodia's army consisted of 4 old men with muskets that were taking a nap while Gudyver was on. Thailand won the war unscathed.

in 1994 Thailand became the world champions of ping pong and remain undefeated to this day. The training regime of the Thai's is unsurpassed involving many visits to Mei-Ling's vaginal ball show. The used balls are then aquired and used for training. The players, not wanting to get any of the ball on them to avoid getting some sick become professional ping pong players in a matter of hours.

edit Food

As a fan of thai food I can comment on the overuse of coconuts and the fact it's green, and if it's not green it's red. And served on banana leaf.

edit Environment

Weather. Wildlife. Plantlife. Risk of being assraped.

edit King Bhumibol Adulyadej


King Bhumibol or Bunny to it's friends.

King Bhumibol Adulyadej, known as "Bunny" after 5pm, is the current ruler of Thailand and the longest serving member of the Thai LGBT party. Taking the reign in 1950, Bunny's first order of business was the creation of a constitution to give all Thai's greater rights. Despite his good intentions it was soon clear what he wanted and what the people wanted were worlds apart. Unable to hear any of the criticisms as his crown was on too tight, the first law of the new constitution was put into force on July 1951; All peoples of Thailand will engage in mandatory sodomy at least once a week. After a couple of weeks people were hardly walking funny at all.

Growing up King Queen Bhumibol was verbally abused relentlessly by his peers due to his miniscule genitals, invisible to the nake eye; his love of being sodomised and his notorious cross dressing antics. After 18 years of the sustained abused he vowed to punish anyone found defaming him in such a way. He was promptly beaten up every day until he became King/Queen when he enshrined in law "lese majeste", which stated anyone found abusing the King in a non-sexual way would face life in prison.

During the 80's, fueled by cocaine and the invent of transgender operations; the king finally made the step towards becoming the woman that was trapped inside his body. His boob job, although lopsided allowed him live his nights as his alter ego "Bunny". Until the 90's "Bunny" was a much loved leader of the country, so loved in fact 120% of the population of Thailand underwent similar operations in the height of its fashion. In 1991 however, when the King/Queen was ready to go under the knife to complete his sex change. The royal council blocked his attempts stating that a woman could not be King and that Queen's were for the tourists, not for running the county. This veto has rendered the King pre-op to the present day. In 2007 in compensation to the king for the veto, the council allowed artical 112 to be written; amending the royal attire of the king to a bikini, stilleto's and a feathery hat.

edit Tourism

[[Image:Thinking maybe some greasey fat hairy guy licking his lips because he wants to go at some 12 year old ladyboything... Struggling to find a picture of Mhaille on this site though.]]

Plan of action - Tourism, sex tourism, more ladyboy references... Maybe go for some sort of AIDS fight back the trafficked sex slaves infect the sex pests with. Thai AIDS! Link that to get some sick because I can and then mention its a shit form of aids that can be cured with Won Ton soup.

edit Martial Arts

Thai Chi - I don't know if it is Thai but it sounds like it. Thaikwondo - Same as above. Thairackattack - Probably won't mention this.

Personal tools