From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
“B'jesus and B'gorrah were thoroughly nice chaps all round.
They always gave me a buzz.”
Bjesus (B'heesus), along with his brother Bgorrah (B'gorrrahhh), were two ancient giants found in the Irish Mythological Cycle, specifically within the Trebor Gabala Erenn - The Book of Chewy Mints. Thought by many to be the ancestors of the Brobdingnagians. The brothers may be cognate with the giants Gog and Magog from Brythonic tradition, later said to be the guardians of the City of London.
Considered by modern day Irish people to be the Father of the Milesians and therefore of the nation of Ireland, Bjesus is still held in high regard, and his feast day of May 21st is considered the most holy and venerable within the Irish Calendar.
As with a number of other famous Christian and Buddhist notable figures, they have their genesis in older pagan figures. These include St Peter (originally the heathen god Behemoth), St Denis (originally Hera, Queen of Heaven) and St Kentigern of Wigan (originally a small Welsh dragon from Monmouthshire). Likewise during the late Medieval period the folktales surrounding B'jesus began to evolve into the tales we see today.
edit Vernacular Tradition
By the late 1700s, Bjesus had taken on many of the myths and traditions that he now holds, including his link to bees and bee-keeping. In Ancient Celtic tradition a bee was seen as a representation for a departed soul, or as a message from an ancestor. Why someone would come back as a bee, and how they would communicate a message to an individual remains a mystery to this day.
The daily ritual intake of honey by the Celtic speaking peoples of the world, as well as the regular consuption of sweet, sweet mead, developed into the notion that people were partaking of the juices of Bjesus, and that he "resides within them" (though in liquid form). Thus developed the popular saying when an individual would meet the personification of all evil or the forces of chaos, that they had "had the Bjesus scared out of them".