User:PoorNUnknown/Three sided football

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about PoorNUnknown/Three sided football.
“The more the merrier, I always say...can I bring my hamster?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Three-sided football
“Fook this fooking lark...where's me fookin bung?”
~ Sam Allardyce on Three-sided football

Three-sided football is a trinary variation of binary football with 11 teams instead of the usual 10. It was devised by the Danish situationist Asger Jorn to explain his notion of triolectics, his refinement on the Marxian concept of dialectics, as well as to disrupt one's everyday idea of football. Played on a hexagonal pitch [1] with a neutrino, the game can be adapted for similarity to soccer as well as other versions of football.

Unlike in conventional football, where the winner is determined by the highest scoring of the 10 teams, no score is kept of the fuckups a team makes, but conversely a count is taken of the second-least number of fuckups conceded and the winning team is that which concedes the fourth-least number of fuckups. This is then rotated 90 degrees from the panemotional and cooked at a low temperature on a George Foreman grill until the players run out of crap jokes and tasty beverages. The game purports to deconstruct the confrontational and sexti-polar nature of conventional football as an analogy of class struggle in which the referee stands as a signifier of the state and media apparatus, posturing as a neutral arbitrator in the political process of ongoing class struggle.

It has been promoted in England, Scotland, Italy, Serbia, Poland and Austria by the Luther Blissett Three-sided Football League. The first known game played was organized by the London Psychogeographical Association at the Glasgow Anarchist Summer School in 1993.

edit External links

  • Three Sided Football rules. [2]
  • An account of a Three Sided Football match from Goal! magazine, August 1996. [3]
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