User:Orion Blastar/resume

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"The following is a work of fiction and any resemblance to real persons or corporations is entirely coincidental."

Name: Orion Blastar
Real Name: Classified
Address: 5150 Graymalkin Avenue, District 268, Missouri 63101, USA
Real Address: Classified
Email: orion_blastar@yahoo.com

edit Mission

To create or work for a business that promotes a postive work environment for which my skills can be of service to meet the needs of customers, stakeholders, employees, managers, and others, and help me reach my true potential as a Pirate Ninja.

edit Technology

SPQR E=MC^2 42 Psionics

Visual BASIC

Visual BASIC.NET

VBScript

Javascript

HTML

PHP

ASP

ASP.NET

Dyanic HTML

Windows

Linux

Amiga

MS-Access

MS-SQL Server

MySQL

Oracle PL/SQL

ANSI C

Turbo Pascal

Tech Support

Networks

Swords

Guns

Starships

Time Travel Devices

Sensor Jammers

398S Hyperspace Navicomputer

Jump Drives

TARDIS

Sonic Screwdriver

MGMP-17

Dyson Spheres

Stargates

edit Work History

edit Future History

Due to Time Travel, these things happened in the far future
4081-4096
Deneb Sector Space Pirate
Lead a fleet of Starships in acts of piracy.
Lying, cheating, and stealing.
Looting and Plundering.
Killing and Wounding.
Mercinary Actions.
Research into Time Travel.
Traveled back to 1995.
4071-4081
Deneb Sector Merchant
Trading Cargo like fruits and nuts.
Leading crew on a Far Trader Merchant class ship.
Exploring the glaxy.
When being a Merchant was found to be unprofitable crew suggested we turn Pirate, see above.

edit Present History

Traveled to the Solimani Sector to try a career on Terra, aka Earth
2002 - Current
Doing business as Orion Blastar.
Business and Computer consulting as self with small businesses as clients.
Network an PC troubleshooting.
Web and Application design and programming.
Research and Development.

2002-2002
Reserved Judgement Not actual name
Medical/Surgical Tools and Inventory Control company.
Programmer/Analyst
Designed Medical Systems for the sterilization and tracking of surgical trays and other packages.
Migrated databases from MS-Access to MS-SQL Server.
Taking abuse from coworkers.
Being backstabbed by coworkers.
Gave my best ideas, which got stolen by other employees (see above), and got fired.

2001-2002
Provergis Not actual name
Technical Support and Helpdesk Outsourcing for Broadband Companies.
Help Desk and Customer Support.
PC Troubleshooting for clients.
Telling clients to try a reboot to see if the problem goes away.
Telling clients that the reason why they have viruses is because they visit too many porn websites.
Found the job was not worth it, left the company.

1997-2001 Dewey Cheatham and Howe, LLC Not actual name
Law Firm specializing in Class Action, Oil, Tobacco, Bankruptcy, Casinos, Democratic Party of the USA, Corporate Law, and other areas.
Programmer/Analyst
Lead Team in development of corporate Intranet and custom Applications in Visual BASIC (3.0, 4.0, 5.0, and 6.0).
Technical Support for employees, managers, and lawyers.
Database design and maintenance.
Migrate databases from MS-Access and MS-Excel to MS-SQL Server.
Upgrade legacy applications to the latest technology.
Quality Control of programs created by other programmers to improve performance and stability.
Taking abuse from managers.
Being backstabbed by coworkers.
Helping lawyers to loot and plunder.
Refused to sell my soul to the corporation, got fired.
1995-1997
Freelance Consultant
Small Business Raider.
Worked for Small Businesses doing contract work.
Looting and Plundering.

edit Education

  • HSD Academy Of Math and Science and Applied Technologies 3.21 GPA
  • AAS in Data Processing Programming Option St. Louis Community College 3.45 GPA
  • BS in Business Management, minor in Information Technologies University of Phoenix St. Louis 3.91 GPA graduated with honors
  • BS in Computer Science, minor in Physics Columbia College St. Louis 3.42 GPA
  • Coursework at University of Missouri Rolla, Harvard, M.I.T, in various sciences and computer studies. A-B Averages in most classes.
  • GCSE English, GCSE Physics, GCSE Math.
  • Missouri Driver's License, no points on the license.
  • Training in CMSOpen.
  • Training in Visual BASIC, Javascript, VBScript, MS-Access, MS-SQL Server, and MS-Office.
  • OTC in the Imperial Merchants, Deneb sector.
  • Member of the Traveller's Aid Society, trained in assisting Travellers in the Far Future when space flight is more common.
  • Ninja training by the Emerald Buddha clan.
  • Pirate training by the Travelling Hit Crew, Deneb sector.

edit Hobbies

  • Role Playing Games
  • Chess
  • Video Games
  • Fixing Computers
  • Retro Computers
  • Ninjitsu
  • Piracy

edit Activities

  • Martial Arts
  • Business Consultant
  • Computer Consultant
  • Volunteer Work
  • Looting and Plundering
  • Change Management
  • Humor Wiki sites like Uncyclopedia
  • Research in Physics and Astrophysics in dark matter, dark energy, time travel.
  • Neuromancer top secret security clearance research work for the DoD, Bad Wolf and Torchwood projects working with the UK government and U.N.I.T.
  • Reserve member of the Time Marshals, after the Time Lords on Galifrey went extinct except for a few unaccounted for Time Lords.

edit References

References are available upon request. They are not listed due to privacy concerns.

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