The mansion looks like a good place to start. You reckon that rich sods like this could afford lot’s of sweets; they may even give money!
The gate seems to shriek “Doom! Doom!” at you as you open it. It clangs shut with a loud “Ouch, for fucks sake I’m trying to get into the spirit of things…”
You carry on up the driveway noting the colourful flowers and cat shit. You figure that an old lady must live here. You ring the bell on the door but don’t hear if it worked or not because of the loud music.
The door opens and you see a handsome twenty-something poke his head through the door.
“You here for the orgy?” The man asks, in his coke addled mind he’s trying to figure out if you’re tall enough.
“What’s an orgy? I just want some sweets.”
“Urg… Oh, ok. Right. Here.” He throws a hand full of small white pills into your environmentally-friendly-reusable-Co-Op bag.
“What are they?”
“Umm they’re like mints. Go on try one, they’re great. They make you have fun. Oh and come back here when your taller.” The man shuts the door and you walk back down the drive way and pop one of the white Smarties into your mouth. It doesn’t taste very minty.
You try and open the gate but it won’t budge. “Nope. Not till you apologise for slamming me.” It says in gleeful, drunk-with-power tone.
“Oh but come on! I’ll give you one of my sweets…” you say employing your winning “Please mummy, buy me it” smile.
“Well, Ok. Just put it in my key-hole.” He says shrugging “It’s sort of a multi-purpose thing really.”
As promised the gate opens for you but as you’re about to leave it makes a request.
“Stay with me. Please? Just for a while I don’t have many friends.”
You agree to stay and enjoy some good times with the gate, you two have a surprising amount in common considering your vast cultural differences. The conversation seems to get ever more convoluted and meaningful as the acid kicks in.
In the morning the police find you and bust the largest drug ring in the country and scientists take away the gate for study and you get in trouble from your mum and dad.