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Mavis Beacon

A powerful tool for stereotype reassignment.
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Selected anniversaries

January 18: Wenns Day (aka Humping Day) (Earth)


David Beckham in traditional pose.

  • 1610 - God divinely inspires Sidney Trammell; Trammell doesn't notice for another two years.
  • 1778 - James Cook is the first known European to discover the "Sandwich Islands", which are later renamed the "Tuna Sandwich Islands", then "Tuna Sandwich with Chips Islands", "Tuna Sandwich with Chips and a Drink (no ice) Islands", and "Japan's Target Islands" before they eventually became the "Hawaiian Islands".
  • 1952 - The first issue of Mad Magazine is thrown in the garbage by your mom.
  • 1990 - The Humpty Dance is the #1 song in America. Depressing, eh?
  • 1991 - Bill Clinton holds a conference about creating a uniting Europe and Asia in to the Nation of Eurasia.
  • 1996 - The Spice Girls declare their hatred for the West.
  • 2000 - David Beckham is transformed from human being into a brand.
  • 2008 - Cloverfield hits theaters across America, unfortunately for New York the movie was based on a true story.

Archived Anniversaries

Word of the day

Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.

In the news

  • God in his recent interview, claims that Iran is nothing but a pigment of your imagination stating that "Just because you saw it on CNN doesn't means that it's true" Matthew 28:10. Amin.
  • The National Association of Cat Breastfeeders announced today that cat breastfeeding is apparently a sin against God, and advised its members to stop breastfeeding cats immediately, or face eternal damnation in a lake of fire and/or brimstone.
  • The President of Iran denies the existence of Uncyclopedia, stating that it's a myth created by the Western World.
  • Steven Spielberg is to release Munich, the Jew's answer to The Passion of the Christ
  • President Josiah Bartlett and President Mackenzie Allen duke it out. Both are in critical condition.
  • Following Brazil's lead, the nation of Canada makes up its mind about what language they want. Formerly both a French and English speaking country, they will be switching to 1337 on April 1st.

More Current Events at UnNews News

Did you know...

  • ...that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?

Do you care...

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Writer and Noob of the Month


Savethemooses won. In fact, nobody else even got a single vote. Fraud is suspected, though Mooses insists he won fairly. And by "fairly" he means ballot stuffing, IRC spam campaigns, and a healthy amount of nooblet pwning on the side, which has nothing to do with writing. But then, neither does the WotM award, usually. His work includes the old classic Pot v. Kettle, the highly mediocre-tastic Mediocre Britain, and a new favorite in J.D. Salinger.


A close-run battle between newcomers Suresh and Whywhywhy ended in a victory for the latter, proving once and for all that democracy just doesn't work. Seriously folks. Why3 likes to consider himself a Noob's Noob and promises to support the word STOAT during his tenure. His "work" includes SimShitty and HowTo:Make Enemies

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Past Winners

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
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The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
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The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
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Where noisy things can live and prosper
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Another way to waste time
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Instructions and guides for anything and everything
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Content-free books
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Useless misquotes galore
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If it makes sense, we don't want it
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Poetry for people who hate poetry
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Debating all the irrelevant issues
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We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
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We'll tell you why things suck
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Broken media repository

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,227 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
W17x11 16666
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
W17x11 8364
W17x11 10392
W17x11 Unknown
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.
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