User:NeoEva88/keitei

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{{title-left|The Origin of Keitei}}
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{{title|The Origin of Keitei}}
   
 
[[Image:Coonler.jpg|thumb|right|A photo promoted by supporters of the "Keitei is a man" theory.]]
 
[[Image:Coonler.jpg|thumb|right|A photo promoted by supporters of the "Keitei is a man" theory.]]

Latest revision as of 11:45, June 15, 2010

Coonler
A photo promoted by supporters of the "Keitei is a man" theory.

The origin of Keitei has long been a point of discussion among scientists and pretentious posers alike. It was finally settled long ago that Keitei actually does exist since "she" is the creator of the universe, but an even more confounding argument goes on as to whether Keitei is actually of the female species, as she claims.

edit History

Scholargentry
A Chinese painting of the great 华语華 (BobBobBob).

edit Origins of the Debate

华语華 (pronounced "BobBobBob"), a wise member of the Chinese scholar-gentry under the Qin Dynasty, first asked regarding Keitei, "Is that 'she' as in '40-year-old male pervert', or '20-something male FBI agent'?" With this inherently Confucian phrase he expressed a universal worry of men, they urge to hit on a female, but the doubt as to whether or not it is a female. BobBobBob was the first to bring this conflict to humanity's attention and is the founder of The Great Keitei Debate.

edit The Splaka Incident

The ancient Greek thinker Splaka, who studied under Socrates, pointed out that Keitei will often "vote too much". It is an undeniable and documented fact that women always want to talk about things and share opinions and other such ninny business that men do not bother themselves with, so Splaka's observation supports Keitei's claim that she is a girl.

edit The NeoEva88 Incident

NeoEva88
How sad.

The daring American renegade blogger, NeoEva88 openly attacked Keitei on her talk page, saying, "You're not a racoon you lying dirtbag, you're a tanuki and you know it." Keitei admitted the truth on his user page, saying, "I am indeed a tanuki." Many consider this undeniable proof that Keitei is not a woman as she claims to be.

Others disagree, pointing out that Keitei only admitted to being a tanuki, not a male. She never claimed to be human and people had long suspected her of being some sort of animal. NeoEva88 advocates persist, saying that the term tanuki meant more than just being a type of Japanese racoon-dog, it also implied having large testicles, something the tanuki are known for. Obviously Keitei could not have large testicles and also be a girl, so with her admission we discover that she is a male.

Critics claim that NeoEva88 is entirely incapable of speculating if Keitei is a woman or not since he is such a hopeless nerd who has no remote idea about women or how to please them.

edit See Also

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