User:MrCleveland/Loopy de loop
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
“No one cares about the French!”
“No one cares about the Canadians”
“No one cares about wolves”
“In Communist Russia...Loopy de Loop doesn't care about you”
“Pepe le Who?”
edit Birth and Childhood
Loopy was born in 1940 by Romulus and Remus in Vichy France. He was called Loopy because he was born when his parents were drunk. He was taken away by Hitler so that he could be his dog, but since he found out he was a wolf, he sent him to a place where they put people that they don't give a fuck about...Quebec.
During the times in Quebec, Loopy would try and help-out the preservation of the Canadian National Forests, but was always turned-down since many trees could grow no matter what in Canada.
Later, Loopy would save near-dead animals from the Canadian Highway (The only Highway in Canada) and his family would eat them...since they were wolves. If Loopy had an animal friend, it would be dead the next morning and one day, Loopy found Bambi's mother injured somewhere and as Loopy was nursing it to health...his parents ate her.
That was the last that Loopy would see his parents and he vowed never to eat the skin of another animal as long as he lived nor drink the milk of it since he was lactose intolerant.
edit Claim to...Obscurity
Loopy's first attempt on the Cartoon Scene was a Disney cartoon called "The Big Bad Wolf's Brother" where Loopy would play the Big Bad Wolf's Brother, but Walt Disney actually hated Canadians...especially French-Canadians even though Loopy did serve Disney vegetarian chili.
After Tom and Jerry left Hanna-Barbera since they were going to the Middle East to make negotiations with Iran, but they later wound-up in Eastern Europe making very bad cartoons, Hanna and Barbera was in desperate need of a new star, so they auditioned many dogs for the new cartoon role, but when Loopy came to the audition, he blew the other dogs away (Literally!). And when Loopy claimed that he was a wolf rather than a dog, they signed him anyway since he was house-broken.
The majority of these shows were about Loopy de Loop saving the world and acting like Jesus (And one cartoon which was never aired had Loopy crucified) but most of his episodes that he starred in were Fairy Tales that were rejected by Disney (Oddly enough, Loopy was rejected by Disney since he went off-script rather than stay on script...and he didn't speak English. Did I mention Disney hated French-Canadians?)
Though Loopy would give William Hanna and Joseph Barbera food, massages, and clean their studio and houses, he was the lowest-paid character ever in the Hanna-Barbera Studios.
edit His last cartoon
Top Cat played a trick with Loopy by using a rubber check which was pink. But the joke was on Loopy since Hanna and Barbera made Top Cat play the trick on Loopy.
After that, Pepe le Pew informed that if Loopy de Loop would be in another cartoon, he would put him in a gas chamber with him in it. Unfortunately, it never happened.
edit Hippie Years
Loopy de Loop did a lot of sound sessions with Brian Wilson and Dick van Dyke Parks for his album "Pet Sounds" which was dedicated to Loopy and since Brian Wilson was too stoned to find out that he was a wolf. Mike Loathe told Brian that he spent too much time on Loopy and his album "Smile" which would be later called "Frown" since Smile wasn't released until 2004. After he said that, Loopy left.
After that, Loopy moved to England where he played the keyboards on many albums such as Donovan's "Sunshine Superman" and "Moonshine Batman", The Beatles albums, The Rutles albums, and Jimi Hendrix albums. He also founded Pink Floyd and re-formed The Moody Blues. He also befriended Nilsson and Tony Visconti.
In 1968, Loopy went to Indiana with The Beatles, The Beach Boys, The Rolling Stones, Donovan, and Frank Sinatra for a great excursion with Yogi. After that, he left with Brian Wilson, John Lennon, and Paul McCartney to make "The White Album". But Loopy left and became a member of The Caballeros after Ken would just hang around with Barbie than with his bandmates.
In 1969 after Woodstock, The LSD started to wear off on Loopy and he found out that his Hippie friends didn't like him because he was a wolf and was caught making love to Little Red Riding Hood and she was 17 so this caused controversy. But the worst came when he was at Altamont where Mick Jagger blamed his Hippie years on Loopy as well as Brian Wilson, but since Loopy was closer, Hell's Angels left him for dead.
edit Fat Years
From 1970 to 1973, Loopy de Loop balooned to 300 pounds and eating nothing but watermelons all day. Since he wouldn't eat meat. And luckily Loopy wasn't in Munich either since his 'friends' were dead...but later were resurrected by Tom and flew in an ark leaving behind Loopy because he could've been the ark at the time.
And During that time, Hanna-Barbera did better without him and here's who cared....
edit Session Musician and Play Performer
Loopy also wrote the music for Orca with Richard Harris singing.
He also was in a few Off-Broadway plays in Quebec where he was Dickinson in the play 1776, Rocky in The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and also part of the William Shakespeare Festival in Stratford. (Mostly he played characters that died. And recently, Loopy was seen with Terrance and Phillip in the Shakespeare play "Comedy of Errors" where he gets farted on.)
edit Born-Again Christian
In 1980, Loopy was so discouraged, that he went to Barack Obama's church and met up with Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Wright told Loopy that wolves were surpressed too much that he did have a right to complain.
Loopy did get along with Martin Luther King and was part of the Civil Rights movement in 1963, but when Kanye West told the blacks that a wolf was with them, they got Michael Richards to hang him upside-down with a fucking fork up his ass. (Luckily, they tried to do that with Michael Richards rather than Loopy).
But during the 80's, Loopy worked in Homeless Shelters, Mental Hospitals, and even for Televangelists. However, Loopy became broke and still got criticized, but he still reads The Bible to this day and goes to a Lutheran Church so that he can sit in the back.
edit Return to TV
In 1993, when Cartoon Network was launched, many cartoons were discovered that were tend to be lost. One of the many were Loopy de Loop cartoons. At the time, Loopy would live with the The Warners. While they escaped and wreaked havoc, Loopy would clean-up after them. But when Steven Spielberg would make the show "Animaniacs", he would leave Loopy behind since he thought he was too damn boring.
But the reruns of Loopy de Loop cartoons would be seen on Boomerang until the 2007 when it cahnged formats.
edit U.N. Incident
Since Loopy wanted to help others after many failed fiascoes, he joined the United Nations and became the Secretary General for the United Nations in 2001, but it was on 9/11 when he took the job and some people there blamed Loopy for that day.
Trouble came even more so when the War of Iraq was planned and Loopy joined forces with the other nations that didn't want to go to war. This backfired after George W. Bush saw Loopy make peace agreements on Iraq, Iran, and North Korea by talking to the Three Little Pigs accusing him to be the next Jimmy Carter.
edit Where is he now?
After being out of the limelight, Ted Turner released his old cartoons which were never seen in 30 years since they interfered with The Warners Films which made more sense than Loopy's.
Loopy was also seen at the Turner Mall in Atlanta until it closed in 2006 where he served Vegetarian Foods, but Yogi Bear drove him out of business after his all-you-can-eat buffets.
Loopy was with Chicken Boo in a nearby region of Monaco where he is an Ambassador for Canada over there since George W. Bush wanted to rid the United States from wolves and keep America wolf-free (Even though Wolf Blitzer is still in America). That and Dick Cheney shot Loopy in the tail thinking it was a Coyote after saving a quail from any harm in Wyoming.
Pepe le Pew still waits for a new Loopy de Loop cartoon, but since Loopy isn't in America now or at least the 48 states, he'll have to wait until Cleveland wins a Championship.
- Quebec has named a Roller Coaster after Loopy de Loop though at Six Flags '67 (Formerly the Expo '67), since he's recognized a lot in that area. It's the safest, and calmest roller coaster on the planet.
- Loopy de Loop placed a bet in 1967 when he was on the set of "Casino Royale", the first and last movie that he was ever in until "Jews Framed Roger Rabbit", that if Columbia Pictures sees a profit in the film, Hanna-Barbera can stay with Columbia. Despite its success...only Loopy stayed with Columbia while Hanna-Barbera found work with Taft.
- Speaking of Movies...Loopy almost had a role in "Donald Duck: Full Frontal", but was turned down not by Disney...but by John Hughes since he really didn't have a role for him in the movie!
- Robert Taft, who actually gave Hanna-Barbera the offer...hated Loopy because he was French-Canadian! That's why you never saw his shows until 1992!
- Loopy de Loop had his second attempt in Hollywood in a couple of Woody Woodpecker cartoons, but since he didn't speak English his voice was dubbed.
- Loopy was the Quebec Nordquines mascot during the NHL years, when they had the worst NHL record ever! (Which was in 1990).
- Lil' Bon-Bon is actually Loopy's son...not nephew. His mom is Red Riding Hood.
- Loopy de Loop gets loopy after drinking Communion wine, and yes he was a devout Catholic!
- Speaking of Catholicism, Loopy was the Pope...for only a day! (This was in 1979 just before John Paul I and John Paul II), but since Loopy couldn't handle Communion wine, he got excommunicated from Catholicisim, which explains why he's a Lutheran (A.K.A. Catholic Lite).
- On July 14th, Loopy joins with Prince Antoine of Monaco for some wine and singing (which sounds more like howling).
- Loopy de Loop has a crush on Minerva Mink, but Slappy Squirrel likes Loopy too because she reminds him of a Lumberjack who's real okay.
- Loopy was also arrested in 2005 for helping out an old lady cross the street in New Orleans during Hurricane Katrina, but all charges were dropped when the case wasn't even real!
- Loopy de Loop was to be adopted by The Goode Family, but they saw Che and adopted him instead since he looked more needy.
- Loopy de Loop now resides in Haiti and won't leave until all the Haitians get food and water. How's that for being a Good Samaritan?
edit See Also
|Looney Tunes & Merrie Melodies|
|Primary: Bugs Bunny • Daffy Duck • Porky Pig • Elmer Fudd • Sylvester • Tweety Bird • Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner • Foghorn Leghorn • Pepé Le Pew • Yosemite Sam • Speedy Gonzalez • Marvin the Martian • Tasmanian Devil • The Barnyard Dawg • Henery Hawk|
|Secondary: Bosko • Clyde Rabbit • Buddy • Goopy Geer • Foxy • Piggy • Beans • Michigan J. Frog • Petunia Pig • Rocky and Mugsy • Granny • Hector the Bulldog • Goofy Gophers • Cecil Turtle • Sylvester, Jr. • Gossamer • Spike the Bulldog and Chester the Terrier Hippety Hopper • Marc Antony and Pussyfoot • Witch Hazel • The Three Bears • Hubie and Bertie • Claude Cat • Sniffles • Ralph Phillips • Beaky Buzzard • Willoughby • Charlie Dog • Pete Puma • Crusher • Count Blood Count • Private Snafu • Sam Sheepdog and Ralph Wolf • Slowpoke Rodriguez • K-9 • Merlin the Magic Mouse and Second Banana • Blacque Jacque Shellacque • Nasty Canasta • Cool Cat • Penelope Pussycat • Egghead Jr.|
|Comics and TV Shows: Honey Bunny • Wendell T. Wolf • Digeri Dingo • Daniel and Timothy Platypus • Lola Bunny • Melissa Duck • I.Q. Hi • Star Johnson • Queen Tyr'ahnee|
|Tiny Toon Adventures: Babs and Buster Bunny • Plucky Duck • Hamton J. Pig • Montana Max • Elmyra Duff • Dizzy Devil • Furrball • Calamity Coyote • Little Beeper • Gogo Dodo • Sweetie Pie • Shirley the Loon • Fifi La Fume • Li'l Sneezer • Concord Condor • Byron Basset • Fowlmouth • Arnold the Pitbull • Barky Marky • Mary Melody|
|Animaniacs: Yakko, Wakko, and Dot • Ralph the Guard • Thaddeus Plotz • Dr. Otto Scratchansniff • Hello Nurse • Ms. Flamiel • Pinky and the Brain • Snowball the Hamster • Slappy Squirrel • Skippy Squirrel • Walter Wolf • Buttons and Mindy • The Goodfeathers • Rita and Runt • Flavio and Marita • Minerva Mink • Chicken Boo • Katie Ka-Boom • Mr. Skullhead|
|Hanna-Barbera: • Ruff and Reddy • Huckleberry Hound • Yogi Bear • The Flintstones • The Jetsons • Top Cat • Wally Gator • Lippy the Lion • Touche Turtle • Space Ghost • Scooby Doo|
|Other Cartoons: Freakazoid! • Road Rovers|