Commander of the Order
The Honorable Mr. Vib, Esq. (AKA "The Kentuckistan Kid," "The Master of Disaster") (born April 18, 1776) is a poster on the site uncyclopedia.wikia.com. He is often seen as a twit, socially inept, and a guy with a fetish for the soothing sounds of the saxophone.
Mr.Vib was born to Woody Allen and Soon-Yi Previt on April 18, 1776. His incredibly ugly appearance at birth was what finally convinced the British that the colonists in America couldn't survive on their own, leading them to start the Revolutionary War that lead to independence.
Growing up in New England, he became involved in an experiment in futility known as the Fountain of Youth, which gave him the power of immortality but also led to a severe case of acne that haunted him until the early 1990s. Constantly moving from town to town, he was responsible for many different calamities. For example:
- He once touched a tomato, infecting it with Bubonic Plague. When somebody ate it and died, it led to the tomato being thought of as a poison for many years.
- His vocal support of Abraham Lincoln in the 1860 election caused a severe rift in the country. Southerners, convinced that all northerners MUST be that ugly and hideous, decided to reverse their attempts at freeing slaves and began to secede from the United States, thus leading to the Civil War.
- He suggested that President William McKinley go to the expo in New York, where he was assassinated, thus leading to the horrible dictatorship in place under Emperor Theodore Roosevelt.
Shuned by the public (despite plastic surgery to improve his appearance), Mr.Vib retreated to the mountains of Chile to live his life as a hermit. He spends his days and nights surfing the internet on websites such as uncyclopedia and various marching band websites. He can also be heard making horrible sounds on the saxophone and passing it off as music, much to the horror of the villagers below his mountain.
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