Crappy gallery mostly consisting of poorly drawn crap that I drew poorly or retouched pics that turned out suprisingly good considering I have no idea what I'm doing.
Featured pics are in
Note that some of the following pics won't make any sense, as they were made for a specific page, rather than as standalone pics.
Pics for pages that I started
That stunned expression tells me that you are glad you got a tattoo of a tarantula on your face.
In the Gobi desert, the natural camouflage of the
protects it from knife-wielding
. In my living room, not so much. Bad
Platoon. I never did find out how it ends. I assume America won.
Maj. John Reisman (Lee Marvin at right) and Wladislaw (Charles Bronson at left) (here in German uniforms), getting ready for the big Allies vs. Axis bake-off that ends the film.
Jerry Falwell, shown piously contemplating your imminent, unavoidable and eternal damnation.
Gen 2:17 But of the secret of the knowledge of the pan and the crepe, thou shalt not eat of it [the crepe]: for in the day that thou eatest thereof, and cook thereon [the pan], thou shalt surely die. Gen 2:9 And God was not as tall as you would imagine; and he was as small as his pan was large. And truly the pan was big; and big was the pan in his tiny hand. 2:10 And he would appreciate it if you would not comment on his shortness, and his lack of height, and also his small stature. 2:11 For mighty is the wrath of God when people point out this thing, and this thing, and, yea, this thing as well.
The wheel and "axle" is poised to revolutionize transportation.
Original lobby poster for
Illegal Aliens from Outer Space!. An unfortunate error lead to the original theater poster having this terrifying kitten, rather than the planned terrifying Mexicalian.
The Wilson's neighborhood, after it's taken over by Illegal Aliens from Outer Space!
The multi-million selling album Supremes Commander.
Supremes Commander's in-game tutorial makes learning fun!
DEAR LEADER's Mii avatar, "D3AR L3AD3R".
The technology of tomorrow, today!
Nikita Khrushchev and robobot of household-type inspecting elite Spetsnaz GRU's 101th Home Cleaning Division.
Look! Is car of far-future. Decade of 1980s will be great for Communism!
Look at this picture for seeing superior Soviet techniques of advertising.
Look! Is Comrade Zukov Smirnoff as appears on television of Soviet transmission! Future is great!
The "Elevator (Social)" Method
The "Man (Standard)" Method
Pope Benedict XVI, giddy with piety at the mere thought of His new plan
Vacations Vacations Vacations Vacations, LLC, providing tourists places that they probably shouldn't tour since 1932
Saudi models showing the latest in Shari'a approved beachwear
"Goddamn! They've got the McRib here! Honey, take a picture of me pretending to put it on that big rock over there."
This painting, believed to be "Man and Spear and Hunt and Sky", is currently on display in the Louvre
Wake up with our morning show
"There is simply no way that this cubicle is up to code"
Hey Kids, it's the Binky the Accountant/Clown Show!
Dun dun duddle-ah dun-dun. Dun dun duddle-ah dun-dun.. Do do-do doodle, dah dah dun...
"Just let me slip out of this suit, and into a dry martini." "We're gonna need a bigger boat."
"The Andy Griffith Show" proved hard for Opie
Rule #1 - You don't talk about Fife club!
Das Love Boot - Opening Title
Suburban Homeboy ( and PLS Honorable Mention Featured Article)
Suburban Homeboy: "Thug 4 life, yo. I wax a chump like a candle."
Ben Franklin, kickin' it oldschool
Suburban Homeboy's whip, yo. Owned by his parents. He can borrow if he's willing to drop off his little sister at ballet class.
Your ride, slightly pimped. Note the stock steel wheels.
Once you start to look alike it's time to trade up.
Before and after of another unsatisfied customer
Midlife Crisis Line even helps celebrities
This is how God's evolution really works (in
Get your commemorative "Danish Cartoon" plate today, before the stores that sell them are burned to the ground (appears in
too, the page for which it was made)
The Prophets of Rock world tour comes to a thunderous finale with a sold-out show at Temple Mount
Time magazine, in an attempt to douse the flames of discontent, names Muhammad (Muhammed, Mohammad or Mohammed)
Man of the Year. They forgot what started the riots in the first place. Pity
The Danes Attempt Reconcilliation
Islamist extremists are unsure how to react to this sketch of what may or may not be the back of Muhammad's head
Terrible illustration of Vishnu with a stick body, comedy moustache glasses, and a rabbit for a hat
I ate spicey food and fell asleep on the toilet
"There is no God but Allah, and Paddington Bear is His Messenger! Alla hu Akbear! Alla hu Akbear!"
Oddly, natives still can't get into the best restaurants.
Nothing says "Japan" like a trip to one of Sanrio's many Hello Titty shrines
Picture yourself on a train in a station, With plasticine porters with looking glass ties, Suddenly someone is there at the turnstile, de Gaulle with kaleidoscope eyes...
Well, Pat. This is another fine mess you've gotten us into...
Miscellaneous (or Pics without a home)
A Vote for Les is a Vote for More
Shown in their natural habitat, two boobies are known as "a pair of tits". Sometimes, fortune cookie fortunes are right friggin' on.
The game all of America is playing, whether they want to or not
Miscellaneous, also. But in a different way
It's me, if I was a meme. Which I'm not.
And God said,
"Let there be humor." And truly His wiggling fingers didst come forth, And spread His holy puppet of shadow across the firmament...
BENSON of the Month, v2.0
BENSON of the Month, v1.1 (a rechop of the
Pics I've made for other people
GVB, delivering pain, misery and valuable scientific information since 1900
DEZE METRO IS UITGEVALLEN is the same as "this metro is not coming" ONLY LOUDER
*Bing, bong* "Dames en Heren, thank you for riding GVB. We'll be experiencing a slight delay..."
By the fall of 1943, Adolf Hitler was forced to appear in
Got Milk? adverts to raise funds for the rapidly failing Eastern Front.
Our engineers have drawn up plans for a technology so revolutionary it will change the world.
Taft Punk posing for their
Rolling Stone Magazine
press shot shortly before cracking down on Yellow Journalism.
Ernie, you have the wrong FUCKING thing again!
"Ernie! Oh, there you are...you know what the manager said about bringing your pitchfork in to work, don't you?"
"Look at Joe! Doesn't the little bugger seems to be a happy busy bee, manipulating his environment to create the best background for a soothing conversation?"
"...Your record collection? Now why on earth would I want to go upstairs with you to look at your
Truthful Vending Hot Coffee: now with 20% more housefly.
"What can I have to go along with the carp? I had the rat yesterday, and the monkey is a bit bland" Mr. J.S. Smithereens, another pleased customer, checking this week's assorted goods
Feeling a bit parched? Why not have a cup of nice hot "chocolate".]]
"Stop me if you've heard this one before...A rabbi and an imam are shipwrecked together on a desert island. The rabbi says..." "I'm sorry, but I have to make this quick. I'm up for 'Best Jedi Costume' in the Star Wars convention next door."
Trust me. You
really should stand here under my umbrella. It's raining cats and dogs out there.
Don't forget to turn your car alarm on
after you bury the car. You can never be too sure.
The Mobile Abortion Clinic. Burglary proof. Some other problem may occur.
You'd think that with that new shiny stereo the bastards have stolen from you, they could afford a better hairstyle.
Oh Noes! Your stereo got stolen! All you got left is a
Stereotse! FU SPANG! YOU ARE USING AN AUTHORIZED STEREO DEVICE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.
Those cops sure learned the limitations of their mugshot camera tripods...
"The boy fired twice and the bear was dead." "Turn state's evidence, and we'll protect you."
The Putz Who Stole Hanukkah
If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead!"
He packed it up with their presents! The dreidels! The
The Putz's small beard/Grew three sizes that day!
"Your car moves from a point in space here, to a point over there. Why is it so?"
"No, no, no! You go from here to there, not from here to there! Pay attention!"
In Soviet Russia, road forks
To bring me to your leader make a right turn now
"I finowy got a wabbit! Heh-heh-heh..."
Christopher Robin, gettin' hammered.
...the Hundred Acre Wood-wide police crackdown netted Piglet, shown here in his mugshot after being charged with vagrancy, operating a wheelbarrow while intoxicated, hunting woozles without a licence, smuggling of unpasteurized honey across state lines...
Franz Kafka started his career as a newspaper cartoonist, before being sued by Gary Larson in the court of his own mind. It wasn't until Michelangelo's parents gave him a "Etch-A-Sculpt" that he decided to become an artist
Unused, but I keep it around because it's cute.
M. Night Shyamalan
's next project, a film about a man and a ghost...or is it?
No, it's not. There, I just saved you ten bucks.
gently handles even the most precious cargo
Lord Vader reluctantly crushes the rebellious Lollipop Guild ( Star Wars: A Very Special Edition)
August 2006: WIRED magazine finally runs out of geeks to put on the cover (in
The nineteenth novel in the god-awful but surprisingly popular
, is due in bookstores during the third year of the Tribulation. Reserve your copy now, sinner
After conquering the rest of the software world, Microsoft stumbles into MMORPGs (
It wasn't until the prom that Hawk realized his friendship with Gung-Ho was truly over (in
Who's Afwaid of a Widdle Apokowips? When death stalks the night, remember, it's all your fault
This user is a member of the Society for Misspelling Philantropy ...Because a silent "H" is a silent killer...