User:Mnbvcxz/That time I was nearly raped by a Puff the magic Dragon during my sojourn in Honah Lee

It looked kinda like this, only fucking psycho.

Dude, that fucking thing was huge. Like, WTF?

So there I was

playing in the fucking woods by the sea, doing my Jackie Paper thing with the make-believe shit and the puppies, right? Like, little boy badass shit.

and this fucking Puff the magic dragon

bursts out of the sky, frolics in the autumn mist all over the place, and instead of going for the dogs, he makes a dragonline straight for me.

so I pulled out my

knife and cut the shit out of the thing, and it tries to mount me! WTF?

I barely got away with a major sinistral external abrasion and a severed brachialis radial.

No, seriously. It nearly raped me.

See also

• That time I was nearly raped by a yak during my sojourn in Canada
• dragon