From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Max Payne

edit I Am Max Payne

I am completely miserable and emo, and have a habit to talk to my self like in a destective noir story. Everyone I touch gets shot, usually multiple times, and I have the supernatural ability to slow down time and dodge bullets in slow motion. I can spontaneously heal myself with nothing but drugs, and I can die by falling eight feet down from a ledge. I also can fit a sniper rifle.... in my pants.

edit About the User

Merc This user is a Mercenary and chooses their own wars to fight in.
NO This user doesn't care.
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext This user believes that admins are control freaks.
Xbox2 This user is addicted to video games. PlayStation Logos

Sunglasses This user is actually not Max Payne. They are an impostor. Get away. Now.

Anieye-45-38 This user is a member of the Inner Party and is probably watching you.
Guitar-22px This user plays guitar because it attracts more groupies, and gets more solos than the bass.
Rabidanimal This user is a Game player. They have probably been eaten by a lot of Grues, so give them some slack.
[insert content here] This user couldn't find any userboxes he/she actually liked.

I am also the father of the What If? Series. So proud!

edit Articles

edit HowTo
edit UnNews
edit Why?
edit UnBooks
edit What If?
edit Categories
edit Casualties:
edit Templates
Personal tools