User:Fredd The Mahmauscher

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WELCOME TO OUR NEW AND UNIMPROVED USERPAGE OF MAGNIFICENT PROPORTIONS

Hi, there! We are the not-so-new Fredd The Mahmauscher! We're far more sophisticated than Mahm00shA

Some people call us Fredd, some call us Musher, others call us Paranoid, but nobody calls us Samantha.

Contents

[edit] Personal Information

We are an 18.5 eons old male. We hail from Egypt, Land of The Suntanned. We attend to the university of "The Temple Of Pillars Of Epic Proportions" where we are studying the dark arts of Sorcery, Necromancy, and Voodoo.

If you are interested in meeting us in person, we live in the Great Pyramid, 4th floor, door 404 (Error: Door Not Found.) Beware, though, don't step near them, spiders (lvl 37), they're poisonous. And don't use the elevator, it hasn't seen the light of the sun (or the maintainance guy's torch) for more than 4000 years. Oh, and don't use the staircase, it will collapse and you will fall to your certain doom, and if -by any chance- you don't, our friendly neighbourhood spiders (lvl 29) will skullfuck you. And don't even think of trying, 671 people have already died trying to reach us. So, unless you can levitate, don't bother. (If you can actually levitate, beware of the acid-spitting, fire-farting mummy-dogs [lvl 51] guarding the windows.[1])

[edit] Fredd The Mahmauscher Features

User:Fredd The Mahmauscher Fredd The Mahmauscher™ comes with many, many new and totally useless features. For example: Fredd The Mahmauscher can legally smoke and have sex, two much anticipated features that Mahm00shA lacked.[2] User:Fredd The Mahmauscher

In October 2009, an IT company, FAKEtech, was awarded a €2 contract to upgrade Mahm00shA's humourware. The following day, he had the operation in which they took away

  • his kidneys
  • half of his liver
  • his frontal lobe
  • his left testicle
    (had it not been for some well-preserved mummies, Mahm00shA would have died.)

But on the brighter side, he recieved

  • a free lobotomy
  • a phallus of colossal proportions
  • a cheap-ass Taiwanese microchip that gave him a slightly better sense of humour.

The following is a table of comparison between the old Mahm00shA and us, the all-new Fredd The Mahmauscher:

Feature Mahm00shA Fredd The Mahmauscher
Age 17.5 18.5
Sex

Male SuperMale
Penis length 7" 14"
Humour style Lame Lame 2.0
Humour version 1.01.00.27 2.00.01.10
Girlfriend Yes Deceased
IQ 163 63
Rollback Plunger No Yes

[edit] Literary Revelations

All are mummy shit.

There are FAs



  • HowTo:Be A King which was co-authored with Sir Sog1970 and featured on the 22st of January of the year 2010 CE.


  • Also, I participated in several IC projects, including Great Britain, which was featured on the 0th of Farsh of the year 2009 CE.


There's also
Then there's the shitty bandcruft

[edit] Footnotes

  1. Or alternatively, you can buy a Wizard's Staff of happiness (+11) and kill off those creatures, but of course, good luck finding a Magical Store that sells this kind of shit at a reasonable price. Or better yet, you can just CLICK HERE for all eternity, hoping to find a portal to our bathroom, or something.
  2. Yes. They're totally useless because we live in Ancient Egypt, and cigarettes haven't been invented, yet. Pussy hasn't been invented, either..




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