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Radio Maryja (Virgin Mary Radio Station) is polish pirate radiostation of Virgin Mary and her comrades from Heavens. Because Mary is busy with her last scandals, Father Director Teddy Rydzyk became temporary head of Radio Maryja. Unfoturnately, Rydzyk discovered that this radiostation is cursed! When he tries to escape, it was too late - Rydzyk belongs to Radio Maryja now.
Radio Maryja lure people with religious content, hardcore rock music and infomercials - only to convert them into strange kind of zombies: Radio Maryja Listeners (Słuchacze Radia Maryja).
They are extremely dangerous, very well organised and deadly, especially in hordes. Even a single cross hit can cause a series of painfull headaches, excess farting and can lead to Radio Maryja addiction. Actually not many people survived meeting with them. Population of this people excedes from 14.999.999 to above 15.000.000 (in 1999) and is still growing.
edit How to recognize Radio Maryja Listeners
- Very agressive - especially when you are carrying a camera.
- In hordes they act like zombies.
- They often meet each other near to Częstochowa city.
- They like to kneel for a long time.
- They listen to Radio Maryja.
- Father Director Teddy Rydzyk for them is more important than God Himself.
- They always carry crosses on theirs necks.
- They wear mohair berets.
edit How to act in case of Radio Maryja Listener cross hit
Well, you are in serious trouble now. You will get addiced to Radio Maryja auditions, you will give all your money to Father Director Teddy Rydzyk, start to buy Nasz Dziennik and watch TV Trwam. You will kneel all the time, and finally you will come to the conclusion that this world is ruled by conspirace of Jewish-Mason Communists. And that's over - you became one of them. Time of transformation ranges from seven picoseconds to 3,14 years.
But do not despair, there is a realiable solution in four easy steps:
- First at all, just after the cross hit go to the nearest ammo shop.
- Buy a gun and amunition (preferred dum-dum or explosive).
- Find a suitable place, like crowded airport or (better) children care center.
- Shot yourself in head. Make sure that your brain will fly all over the place.
Unfortunately that is the only one known way to prevent becoming Radio Maryja listener.