Today's Message of pain
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Loneliness is the dark despair of solitude.
It is the feeling that no one loves me.
Not even my mom or my cat really understand the pain of Teenaged Angst.
No one understands me.
No one loves me.
My family claims that they do, but we all know they're lying.
God, I hate them so much; the fakes.
The only people who love me, The only ones who understand or care
All live in my iPod...
Valentines Day. People are supposed to be happy, right?
I'm not.
Not since she left me.
I guess she found someone more screwed up than I am,
or perhaps he's just more Scene than I, or maybe it's his hair.
It was the best three days of my life, though, with her.
She was so much better than the girl last week.
I let her draw Xs and Cut Lines on my wrists in sharpie.
They're still there, mocking me, reflecting the darkness in my soul.
They are tempting me.
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Did you care...
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*...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ...that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
- ...that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
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Recent deaths
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Today sucks because...
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June 19: Faja Day (Netherlands); Irony Is Ironic Day (UK)
- 1138 - George Lucas devises the evil world conquering plan of THX.
- 1269 - King Louis IX of France orders all Jews found in public without an identifying yellow badge to be fined "if they want to be fined, but really, if they want trouble, run away quickly, cause I think they breathe fire and stuff"
- 1443 - Graham The Bastard is crowned King of Ireland
- 1770 - Somebody says "Jesus is coming soon". His followers are still waiting.
- 1776 - In the beginning of the American Revolution, Boston Herald proclaims: "HOLY SHIT! WE'RE WINNING!"
- 1792 - Puzzle potato officially missing from French treasury.
- 1816 - William Henry Webb is born. Vows to make a world wide name for himself. Invents extremely silly game.
- 1865 - Slaves in Texas finally figure out that they're free, only two years after being told so.
- 1866 - Slaves in Texas, after much debate, decide to go back to being slaves because they don't know what else to do.
- 1867 - Slaves in Texas realize that they can breathe fire and shoot lasers out of their eyes, and soon proceed to take over the Bush administration.
- 1943 - Race wars are held Beaumont, Texas, leaving the tally: Whites – 287; Everyone else – 0
- 1953 - The Rosenbergs commit suicide by electric chair in Sing Sing Sing Prison.
- 1980 - Freddy Mercury spies a silouette on the wall.
- 1983 - Batman has New Years Eve Party at Wayne Manor. In attendance are Spiderman, Superman, and Wonder Woman among others, but a lonely Bruce Banner is left out of the loop.
- 1984 - The Incredible Hulk is born.
- 1987 - Kool Aid is first conceived by Elvis Costello.
- 1989 - Hamburger Helper slaps Chef Boyardee; Valachi family outraged
- 2007 - Gary Coleman's low budget commercial is aired on ABC
- 2008 - Jamie Lynn Spears gives birth to bastard daughter, Maddie
- 2009 - Osama Bin Laden voted biggest dick in universe for ninth straight year.
- 2010 - Neo enters the Matrix again. Changes back to Mr. Anderson.
- 2011 - The exact day that the June 19, 1867 entry was made.
- 2012 - The one year anniversary of the June 19, 1867 entry. But who cares, "2012" would have already happened.
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Poets of the Month
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Modusoperandi hunts down random, unfunny shit which he replaces with less-random, quasi-funny shit. Occasionally he gets up off his ass (or more correctly, sits down on it) and makes a page of his own, to which no one ever goes.
Recently he's been making pictures that people don't like and, having discovered UnNews, has been making fake news stories (rather than the fake regular stories that he normally makes).
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The Bard (baptised 26 April 1564 – died 23 April 1616) was an English poet and playwright widely regarded as the greatest writer of the English language, and the world's preeminent dramatist. He wrote approximately 38 plays and 154 sonnets, as well as a variety of other poems. Already a popular writer in his own lifetime, the Bard became increasingly celebrated after his death and his work adulated by numerous prominent cultural figures through the centuries.
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Congratulations to Hardwick Fundlebuggy, our Poet of the Year, and Mhaille, our Self-harmer of the Year!
Vote for Poet of the Month | Vote for Loner of the Month | Vote for Self-harmer of the Month | Past Losers
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