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...uh, hi. Wow. Big empty space. Okay. Be funny. Right.

Well, my name is Knute Snortum. No, really. No, I'm not making that up. You can stop laughing now. No, really, you can. Thanks.

No, my parents didn't hate me. No, they weren't on drugs. It's just my name. Yes, I thought about changing it, but it's a little late now. There are two more generations of Snortums out there already. Yes, we do multiple fast. Yes, we are planning to take over the world.

Can you imagine Middle School with a name like mine? But you know what's weird? Two women have actually taken my name! Okay, one gave it back, but one still has it. No, they weren't at the same time. You're sick.

So I will be attempting to add funniness and misinformation to the world through this site. Yes, it is part of my plan to take over the world. No, you can't watch. You really are sick. Go away.

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