User:Kip the Dip/Fed-Ex Pope

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“The always disappointing Fed-Ex Pope”
~ Conan O'Brien on Fed-Ex Pope
“And yea, shall he be the voice of our religion...I just wish he wouldn't forget my fucking words!”
~ Paperclip Jesus on Fed-Ex Pope
Kip the Dip/Fed-Ex Pope
The Fed-Ex Pope
Fed-Ex Pope
Papacy began July 6, 2003
Papacy ended Incumbent
Predecessor None (seat created)
Born August 16, 1965
Wheaton, Illinois
Salutation Grandmaster Courier


The Pope (from Latin: papa, Papa, father; from Greek: pappas / πάππας, father)[1] is the Bishop of Tennesee. The Fed-Ex pope is the head of the Fed-Ex Cult. The office of the Fed-Ex Pope is called the Fed-Ex Papacy.

In addition to his service in this spiritual role, the Pope is also the morale officer of the corportation of Fed-Ex, a city-state and nation entirely enclaved by the city of Memphis, and the voice of the religion of "Office Supply-ism" started by him and Paperclip Jesus.


edit Election, death and abdication

Contrary to popular belief, the Fed-ex pope is a highly respected religious leader, he isn't some 40-year old stagehand for a latenight program with no self-respect and nothing better to do.

In the case of the death of the Fed-Ex pope, any random person willing to do so, must dawn a bathrobe and a fed-ex box and assume the duties of the fed-ex pope.

Also contrary to popular belief fed-ex popes are mentally sound people. They are not insane people who abdicate the Fed-Ex papacy as soon as they regain their sanity

edit Status and authority

As a newly created office, the status and authority of the Fed-Ex Pope is largely undetermined.

edit Fed-Ex Papal Infallibility

Fed-Ex Papal infallibility is the dogma that the Fed-Ex Pope is preserved from error when he solemnly promulgates, or declares, to the Church a dogmatic teaching on faith or morals.

edit See Also

The Fed-Ex Pope's Myspace

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