User:Kevillips/UnReviews:North

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
This page is a work in progress
But let's give it a chance. The author will finish it later.
Health Warning: Putting this template on a page consisting of a few lines or worse will not save you and may actually get you banned.
This page will be re-checked on 6 May 2011
UnReviews: Telling you what you think about your consumer preferences for you.
PlainCompass

North is an arbitrary calendular direction which is often considered the same as top. From an astrological viewpoint, North is no more top than West is bottom. North comes off as over confident, lazy and smelly. North has a habit of always winning. US Civil War, Vietnam War, Canada/US War on weather. This Meta:Review is a compendium of reviews from a variety of perspectives -and apparently a variety of paradigms on what exactly North is. -ed.

North seems to want to say YES but always ends up saying NO. This is very frustrating for the users of north. They see north everywhere. Famous abbreviated signs include: 'No Trespassing, No pets, and the Broadway hit No No Nanette.

edit Bullet point perspectives on north

  • Carolinas on north
While the south has its Myrtles, much is said about the sports teams, North plays on in the Carolinas. So important are they to the carolina economy, the cocks often stay in their coop.
  • Dakotas on north
In the war between the Dakotas, North won, and earned the right to have the International Peace Garden. This has never been forgotten by South, and as a result, has written the Black Hills and the badlands out of North Dakota history. They are still there, but shunned by the rest of the country.
  • East on north
While the east gets the sunrise every day, its the Midnight sun of the north that gets all the talk. East resents taking second position in the join Northeasterly production, and provides terrible storms as a result. Nor'easters have been known to swamp more than whaling ships, arrgh.
“ 'e sunk my whaler”
~ East on North
  • Ebert on north
“I hated this direction.Hated hated hated hated hated this direction. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant traveller-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would follow it. Hated the implied insult to the travelers by its belief that anyone would be rewarded by going in that direction.”
~ Roger Ebert on creation of North
  • Great White on north
As a species the Great White often takes off more than it can chew. This is found in numerous belly cuts after they are caught by fisherman. Great White North relations have been tense, but overall, Great White gives North one fin up.
  • South on north
South almost always loses to north. South remains bitter and cannot seem to get past it.
  • West on north
West is a funny dude, west can be north or south. North's arrogant insistence on being first in any joint venture between the two, puts an obvious strain on any joint project. In The Pacific Northwest, Pacific gets the upper hand, but North nearly pummels the Pacific with Alaskan icebergs.
  • Who's on north
With north in first position, what takes up second, I Don't Know is third. The classic coming of age story won North his first Tony award when Who's on North played on North Broadway.
“I Don't Know is on Third”
~ Who's on North

edit See also

UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
This article is part of Uncyclopedia's UnReviews series. See more UnReviews
This subject is 4 out of 5 stars!
That's pretty good!
4stars

Main Page

Personal tools
projects