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H2g2 logo Don't Panic!
Kdkat5 is actually h²g² Researcher {{{1}}}.

"Neither fish nor fowl..."

This user is made up of snakes, snails, puppydog tails, sugar, spice, and everything nice. Or they may be made up of something entirely different like lint and fish scales or frog legs. In any case, they are transgendered and do not easily fit into male or female categories. This user has not been asked to be on Jerry Springer or Ricki Lake yet and is somewhat disappointed, but will continue to work diligently on being more white trashy. They disagree strongly with the doctor present at their birth who was positive their gender was whatever he said it was.

Note: This user is now accepting donations for help paying for sexual reassignment surgeries and hormones.

edit Poor Attempts at Humor

edit This is supposed to be about me?

I belong more in NYC than anywhere else, but I was really only conceived there. I was forced to spend my childhood in Miami and Central Florida learning how to rip off tourists. New York's just about the only place I feel at home. Right now I'm in hell- I mean.....Wichita, Kansas.

Boredkid This user is a Registered User and they can upload images and move pages, whoopdie freakin doo.
Iloveny This user is a New Yorker
... The Mets... I mean the Yankees
... suck... I think???

(Uncyclopedians from the greatest city ever!)
.sdrawkcab si resu sihT

!degnellahc-yllatnoziroh TON si resu sihT :etoN
Uncyclopedia elzzup otatop
FloridaFlag This user is a Floridian
"What hurricane? I ain't budging.
Go out and get some donuts.
Those'll be the first to go."
Kraspin This user enjoys staring at spinning objects. They may be afflicted with Attention Deficit look at the birdie!.
You can help by paying for their Ritalin, or finding them a kitten to play with.
Autism11 This user is an aspie and thus a member of The Master Race; bow before his/her intellectual might, puny Neurotypicals! (or alternatively punch the user in the face and take his or her lunch money)

LeprechaunMoon This user is secretly training to be a Leprechaun, and believes themselves to be Irish.
Virgindeguadalupe This user is Catholic and believes articles become featured through good works, not faith.
Starofdavid This user is 50px-Jewish_link.GIF, and probably controls Uncyclopedia in some remote way.

Sign1 This user is a mutant.
Grandpiano This user is a big pianist, and as such believes they are better than all other musicians.
FA-22 Raptor This user is an aeroplane, and can be annoying. No offence to pilots.
אױ װײזמיר Der usernik vant you should shtop bothering dem when dey daven Toyreh, nu?

I'm on a roof with a rifle

edit Yeah, I'm a nerd...

ju-X This user only speaks Joual canadien enough to seduce native Joual canadien speakers.

I am very good at understanding many different languages, whether I have taken them as classes before or not... It's just a skill I have. Because I already have too many userboxes, I shall just list the languages I know.

I have a basic understanding of Pig Latin, HTML, BASIC, MediaWiki, Klingon, MUDD, Lesbian, bullsh*t, Italian, Spanish, French, Frisian, German, American Sign Language, Elvish, Biblical Hebrew, Old Gaelic, Yiddish, Ladino, Latin, and Arabic.

I have an even more basic (a 2 year old could speak better) understanding of Vietnamese, Japanese, Urdu, Swahili, Russian, Polish, Modern Greek, Israeli Hebrew, Irish Gaelic, and Dutch.

I can write, read, and understand better than I can speak - in most cases. I am a near native speaker in Classical/Ancient Greek, Californian, Canadian, Correct English, and Texan.

I speak Newspeak, Floridian, New Yorker, Politiks, and Kansan fluently. I am forced to speak American English and do so grudgingly only when I must deal with complete idiots.

us-G This user does not speak American English and furthermore believes American English to be an embarrassment to language. This user desires genocide of all speakers of American English.

Approved by the Kansas State Board of Education
This page meets all criteria and requirements for use as teaching material within the State of Kansas public school system. It consists of facts, not of theories, and students are encouraged to believe it uncritically, and to approach alternatives critically.

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