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“Kamek98 has made many fantastic images, at least two of which I have made love to on at least nineteen occasions. My genitals ache for them every single evening and someday they will make my dreams come true and love me! Also Olipro sucks balls.”
~ Chief on images I made or stole.
DogNewspaper This user subscribes to the UnSignpost: The Newspaper That DOESN'T Think It's Better Than You!
Like.pngYour girlfriend, Megan Fox, Emma Stone, and 28,452,077 others like this

Thy page of Kamek98. Call me Eric. If thy wishes to speakith with me, come here where we shall discuss matters. And rememberith, callith thy Eric. OR DIE. Lol, Thy is onlyith kidding! But seriously.

By the way, my biography will be towards the bottom of the page above templates. Please, do not be offended by any of the content. They're just ones that are ones I like (Chuck Norris likes this article, This user is a ninja, etc.) or ones that are true. (Right handed, loves My Chemical Romance, boy, heterosexual, etc) Also, the one that says this user doesn't trust Wikipedia is just a joke. I wanna punch anyone who says Wikipedia isn't reliable. With a passion.

For the bitches who want my number, we can get to know each other better. My number is located here------------->*.

Thy Rules

“If you are sexist, racist, a homophobe, or just a fucking asshole, then go home!”
~ Gerard Way during a concert.

DO NOT Vandalize me like that douchebag did during my three-day ban. I'll execute you... or just be a little upset.

My Signatures

If you wanna check out my sigs from the past, present, and future; then go no further! However, via my laziness, if you view certain signatures of mine on my talk page or here some features like links will be bold and not linking to anything.

1. General of All Branches of the Military and the Head of the State Police Eric (Sep 30-Nov 21, 2012)

2. Sir Peasewhizz de New York (Morning to Evening of Thanksgiving of 2012, which was Nov 22nd)

3. SirPeasewhizzdeNewYork Click here to talk (Nighttime of the day of Thanksgiving 2012 - December 28th, 2012)

4. Sir Peasewhizz de New York (Chat) (Stalk?) (Dec 28th, 2012 - Present)

My awards

Noobaward Noob of the Moment November 2012

Good scissors Murder Frog has awarded you a pair of scissors!
Now go run around with them.

My writings 'n' stuff


Below are articles that I have written. Quality level is one's opinion, but Spike knows quality. I just have a vivid imagination and with extreme ADHD, I seem to turn anything I read more funny and inappropriate than it really is, or should ever be. They are in alphabetical order. New articles stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed. ps I stole the "division style" from Spike's userpage because I am lazy.


Below is a list of HowTos I have written. Newly added HowTo articles stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed.


Below is a list of UnScripts I have written. Newly added UnScripts stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed.


Below is a list of UnNews I have written. New UnNews articles stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed.


Below is a list of UnPoetia I have written. New UnPoetia articles stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed. I have a thing for music. Comments are included next to them.


Below is a list of UnTunes I have created. Newly added UnTunes articles stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed. Comments are included next to them. I have not made audio for any of them, (right now I have made just one) so basically they classify as UnPoetia.


Below is a list of UnBooks I have created/written. New additions will be stated. When a week passes from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed. Comments are included next to them.


Below is a list of "Why?"s I have written. New "Why?"s will be stated. When a week from its creation, the "newly added" will be removed.

My Created Templates

Below is a list of templates I have made. That actually matter and is more likely to be used than some others I have made. Not in alphabetical order.

  • Loves MCR (A template with Gerard Way on it for My Chemical Romance fans.)
  • Infobox Military Conflict (an Infobox for battles, wars, etc.)
  • Weapons list (A list for people to list things that can kill you. But please, there is already tons of stuff listed, so read it before you add something and make sure it is reasonable. There is already enough goof in there.)
  • Three Kingdoms A template for Three Kingdoms battles here.
  • Confusing material A template for the top of pages that contain confusing material. Rather it is confusing as in poor writing, a confusing topic, or both. Random texts appears. There a more than five random texts that can appear. Have fun.
  • Diseases A template with diseases on it. Don't worry, you won't catch one. Maybe.--Sir Peasewhizz de New York (Chat) (Stalk?) 23:44, January 5, 2013 (UTC)


Below is a list of articles I have rewritten, or came close to rewrite status

My Features

Below is a list of featured content that was written/rewritten by me. Whatever necessary is included next to them. The feature date is also included. The score is also included. In order of date featured.


September - December 2012 (with a drizzle of March 2011)

The first time I've ever been to Uncyclopedia was around April/March of 2011. Being extremely obsessed with Dynasty Warriors at the time, I was Googling Dynasty Warriors and came across a page on a Wiki-like site that was mocking the game. Unaware of Uncyclopedia's ways of imitating Wikipedia, I became upset when I saw a few joking lines and gay in the See also section. I don't know if it was my first visit or second visit, or third of fourth, or whatever. But I ended up going to the talk page for the article and writing a section (noticing that the page might be a parody page) titled simply, "I'm Fat". It was there when my lack of humor could first be noted on the wonderful parody website of Uncyclopedia. My first edit under my old computer IP 74.something-something-blah-blah-blah: I'm new to this sight. Is this article just joking? Because I enjoy Dynasty Warriors............ bitch. I left the comment unsigned, too. But that doesn't matter. (Recently when checking back to this article remembering my first encounter with this site, YouFang had replied to it saying it was an accurate representation of Dynasty Warriors, being the first conversation with an Uncyclopedia user)

Around late September of 2012 (probably stumbled upon this sight multiple times between March 2011 and then, but I can't remember exactly) I started coming to this sight on a regular basis or something to that matter. I can recall laughing so hard I couldn't breathe to articles that pulled me into Uncyclopedia like People's Republic of China, Ninja, Joke, Samurai, New York Yankees, My Chemical Romance, and other pages like that. One day I ended up making an account to edit and be a part of Uncyc. (already been a long-major editor to a few projects like WikiProject:ThreeKingdoms and updated logs to the 2012 New York Yankees season on Wikipedia. I've been editing Wiki since probably 2008 and have been a member of Wikipedia since January of 2011, being my first edit of Dynasty Warriors 7, also my first project)

My first three edits on Uncyclopedia were 1) a Three Kingdoms/Dynasty Warriors reference on practical joke. 2) Creating a subpage for User:Kamek98/The Black Parade, still incomplete if someone wants to lend me a hand. 3) An edit to Paystation 2, being the quote "I fucking love paying games" by "Gamer".

I am one of the new users that came in Fall of 2012 along with MagicBus, Leverage, Sinner George, and a few others. Check them out, seriously. They're pretty decent writers. Especially that Leverage guy, he's my favorite.

I don't remember what I was having a problem with, but I ended up stumbling upon an online IRC version. I first talked to User:RAHB or User:Zombiebaron, I can't remember who. But when I took a liking to them, I showed them my Wiki stuff such as my fake gamelog (in my Wikipedia userspace) for a 2029 fake my-fantasy New York Yankees gamelog. They said I should watch what I do because people might come across it and think it is real. Then I ended up having them help me move it into Uncyclopedia (I bet you they allowed me to do it to save the Uncyclopedia is dying crisis going on during that time). I never finished fixing it, so it was moved into my userspace. You can view this piece of shit here. This whole IRC and season thing occurred on September 20th, 2012.

The next day on October 1st while I was on Facebook, I was talking to my friend named Sam. Me and him always joked around about when we take over the government, we'll make these or those rules and that kind of random stuff. Then we had a conversation where I wrote down a bunch of acts (original from Sam being the first of what I will reveal on the next line of text). I wrote a whole document on these acts and based them upon our own opinions on society and people around me, along with a highschool fatass bully. (Not a demon one, just one that everybody wants to secretly bitch slap so freaking badly) The act; The Swag Acts. It was then I wanted to record these and almost immediately thought to put it on Uncylopedia. So I did. Then I used some Facebook conversations and based a short-story based on it. What happened? My first article; Sam's Empire. It is whacky, and considered vandal. However, it is not vandal and WAS NOT INTENDED THAT WAY. But it still technically is vandal. I'm fortunate it wasn't deleted as a result of VFD. (Evened at 0 after a 4 for and 4 against vote, mostly saved by pity)

Soon, like early Wikipedia, I didn't get off to a good start. I made shit. Okay, not literally. I wasn't giving quality. I would constantly nominate failure nominations that no-doubt sucked. I ended up getting into a feud with some people on my consistency to nominate crap articles. It is still a minor-ongoing topic with Spike, who is trying to teach me to not be stupid and find quality articles. No doubt, I'm getting better.

My next couple of articles were Date Masamune, Ancient Aliens, and Samurai Warriors. I ended up entering User:Frosty's Noob Only Writing Contest with a few of my shit works. I entered Date Masamune, UnTunes:InFamous Last Words, and HowTo:Upset the Gods. The HowTo did the best out of my work, and is still some of my best work.

Along with that, I ended up making more articles and getting to know users. Some in not so good ways. However, I did end up winning the Noob of the Month Award in November of 2012 by a score of the \sqrt{36}.

I did get banned for three days in November for shitnom. I don't want to talk about it.

On November 7th, the first article I nominated that was featured happened. Hairy ball theorem. When I nominated it, you could call it a "bad article". When Spike saved the day and rewrote it into a feature-worthy article; one that is amongst the ranks of November 2012's Top 3 Articles. It was even so good, Spike rubbed it in on his Userpage:

“Amid repairing Uncyclopedia's worst articles, I once exercised the presumption of repairing an article claimed to be Uncyclopedia's best. (The claim was one of many made, by nominating it for main-page featuring, by a user who wouldn't know a quality article if it bit him.) This strategy proved to be the fast track for featuring.”
~ Spike on Hairy ball theorem being "Saved of VFH".

Thanks, I appreciate that comment on being clueless if it were to be an occurrence where upon my rear end was bit by a quality article.

On December 8th, 2012: Romance of the Three Kingdoms *secretly gets an erection* was featured. I nominated it, and it was in favor of a 12.5 to 0 consensus. Not even ONE against vote. Yeah! *silence in room* Oh, wow! Whatever. Well, it was the first unshit (see what I did there?) nomination I made on this site that got featured. That means nobody rewrote. And please. Don't mock me, let me pat my shoulder! It's a personal achievement!

On December 11th of 2012 I decided to do my first Pee Review. I already had Sam's Empire been reviewed. So I decided to do one on Igotnothing's article, Shadow the hedgehog (video game).

On December 13th of 2012, my first of the featured content that was created by myself, Why?:Your cat died was featured.

At the end of 2012, I unexpectedly was nominated for both Uncyclopedian of the Year and Writer of the Year. Thanks Kippy.

And that was my first year (or first four months here) on this wonderful world of Uncyclopedia!

2013: The year that followed 2012


This user is right-handed.

In Latin they would be Dexter.

Nuvola apps important orange This user should not be trusted.
Cnorris WARNING:This user knows Chuck Norris and therefore must be either Mr. T, Chuck Norris, Oscar Wilde or dead. Proceed with caution!!!
Nuvola apps important This user hates you and everyone you care about.
Popeeyebeams This user is a complete, irredeemable daffodil. He/she/it is Bat Fuck Insane, and agrees at the daffodil.
This user is a boy and is made of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails.

Adult neon This User is too Damn Sexy!
If you saw this user it's possible that you might fall to the ground and

worship him/her, or spontaneously combust from a sex drive overload.

Shuriken This user is a Ninja, with dominion over everything totally sweet.
TheJeeMan Jesus loves this user, and has blessed this page.
NO This user doesn't care.

BS This userpage is bullshit.
HeteroSym-pinkblue2.svg This user is straight and so desires intimate relations with members of the opposite sex. The freak.
... This user would be a professional procrastinator, but he or she can't be bothered.

This user is reading your thoughts!

Deadbarney3 This user believes Barney is evil and therefore must die.
Lorenz attractor yb.svg This user is fascinated by chaos theory. Probably, s/he doesn't really know but 'chaos' sounds faintly apocalyptic: bring on the carnage!
Xbox2 This user is addicted to video games. PlayStation Logos

Antisensor This user is against computer and video game censorship and regulation as they like porn and violence (though not always at the same time).
Mcr This user fucking loves My Chemical Romance, and wishes to join The Black Parade.
Mario-lo-res This user is a Gamer and therefore creepy.
MEH This user redefines lazy.
Wikipedia-logo This user doesn't trust Wikipedia as far as he can throw it... but nonetheless uses it on a daily basis.
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