User:Kaizer the Bjorn/Caffeine

Thisishowacaffinemolecule looksofcourseitdoesn'tactually looklikethatthisisjustadiagram ofhowthemoleculeisstructured inreallifeitlookslikeawhite powderunlessitsdissolvedin coffeeorsomething.

Caffeineisachemicalwhichmakesyourreallyhyperandexitedandgivesyoulotsofenergyandstuff. Itsfoundincoffeeandchocolateandbawlsandenergydrinks. Idrinkthosethingsallthetimeanditmakesmefeelreallyhyperandexcitedandstuff. PeoplesayIhavetoomuchcaffeinebutthey'retotallywrongIonlydrinklikefifteencupsof coffeeadayforcristssakehthatsnotalotyouknowwhatImean?

WhereCaffeinecanbefound

CaffeineisfoundinallsortsofplacesitsincoffeewhichIdrinkalotandinchocolateandFooshmintsandcoffee. IreallylikedrinkingcoffeeittastesgoodanditgivesmeabuzzanditkeepsmefromfallingasleepwhenIminthemiddleofsomething. OnetimeIdrankfiftysixcupsofcoffeeandeverythingwasmovingreallyslowlylikeIwasinTheMatrix. CaffeineisalsofoundincaffeinepillswhicharepillsofpurecaffeinethosereallygiveyouaboostIdonteventakethemoneatatimeItake themonebottleatatimewheneverImfeelingnormalIjustpopdownafewcasesofcaffeinepillsanditgoesaway. SomepeopleliketheircoffeewithmilkandsugarIlikethesugarsometimesbutthemilkjusttakesuproomthat couldbefilledwithextracaffeine. Ilikeeatingdoughnutstoowithmycoffeedoughnutsarereallygoodwithcoffeeyoucandunkthemandeatthemthenhavemorecoffeeand moredoughnuts. Fooshmintsarethesemintsthathavecaffeineinthemtheyaregoodbecausetheyhavethesameamountofcaffeineasacupof coffeebuttheymakeyourbreathsmellniceunlikecoffeewhichmakesitsmellbadmybreathsmellsbadfromcoffeealotbecauseIdrinkmorethan mostpeoplebutthenIjusttakesomeFooshmintsandmybreathsmellsniceagain.

UsesofCaffeine

Itriedtomakeadrawingbutmyhandwas goingallovertheplacesoIcouldn'tyouknow whatImean?

CaffeineisusedtokeepyouupandkeepyoufromfallingasleepitcertainlyworksformeInevergotosleepIhaven'tsleptforlikethreeyearsit'stooboringyou justlaythereanddonothingyouknowwhatImean? Istarteddrinkinglotsoofcoffeeincollegebecauseineededtostayuplatetofinish homeworkbutitwaskindahardtoreadbecausethewordskeptmovingalloverthepageitwasreallyannoyingIthoughtitwas becauseIwasgettingtiredsoIhadmore caffeineandIpassedoutthenwhenIwokeupmyroommatewasalllike"Dudeyoudrankwaytoomuchcoffee."onlyhesaiditreallyslowlylike "Dude, you drank way too much coffee."

Caffeineisalsousefulwhenyou'replayinggamesbecauseyoucanbereallyalertandfastandyouplaybetterespeciallybecauseyou'reprobablyplayingatnightwhenmostpeopleareasleepsoyouhavetohave caffeinetostayawakethismakesitreallypopularamonggamerswhoconsumeitinlargeammountsbuttheydefinitelydon'tuseitasmuchasIdo. Idon'tuseitforgamingmostofthetimethoughIjusttakeitbecauseitmakesmealwhackedupitslikeadruglikekittensonlyitswaybetteryouknowwhatImean?

EffectsofCaffeine

ScientistssaythatcaffeineisadrugbecauseitisnotafoodanditeffectsthewaythebrainworksI'veneverhadanydrugsbesidescaffeinesoIwouldn'tknow. CaffeinereallymakesmeallweirdandcrazyIguessthatstheeffectithasonthebrainbecausewheneverIhaveliketwoboxesofcaffeinepillsIgetatonofenergyandIgetallhyperandstuffyouknowwhatImean? CaffeineusedtobereallyeffectiveIcouldjusthavefiveorsixcupsandIwouldgetallhyperandexcitedandstuffbutnowcaffeineisnotsoexcitinganymoreIhavetohavelotsofittogetabuzz IguessthatsbecauseIgotusedtoitovertimelikesomescientistssaythatIfyoutakeadrugalotyougetusedtoitsoyouhavetotakemoreotherwiseitwon'thaveaneffect. Speakingofscientistssomeofthemdidanexpirimentonspiderswheretheygavethemsomecaffeineandlookedattheirwebsandtheywereallfuckedupitwaslikethemormalspiderswebwasallcondensed andneatandthenthecaffeinatedspiderwebwasgoingallovertheplaceitwaslikeFewoo! Fewee!Fwoosh!youknowwhatImean? SometimesifIhaveenoughcaffeineIgetlikethatI'malllikeFewoo! Fewee!Fwoosh!andI'mgoingallovertheplaceyouknowwhatImean?

AlternativestoCaffeine

SomepeoplesaythatcaffeineisbadforyoubecauseitmakesyourheartgoreallyfastandsoundlikeamachinegunbutIdon'tknowanythingaboutthatI'vebeenoncaffeineforthepastfifteenyearsnow soIdon'tthinkitsreallythatbadbutmaybeitisandiwilldieanearlydeath. Ifyouthinkcaffeinemightbebadforyouthereareseveralalternativestoitthatmakeyouallexcitedandstuffimgoingtotellthemtoyou nowsoyoubetterlistenbecauseaparentlyItalkreallyfastIdon'tthinkIdobuteveryoneImeetsaysthatsoIguesIdoanywayheregoes:

1. Adreanaline-Adrenalineisgreatyoucanfinditinhospitalsbecausetheyuseitforpeoplewhoseheartsstopbeatingsoifyouraidahospitalyoucangetsomeandinjectacoupledozendoses inI'vehadadrenalinebeforeitwasreallygreatalmostasgoodascaffeinebutitwassohardtogetIthinkiwouldprefercoffee.
2. Sugar-OndayswhenIhavetwicetheammountofcoffeeInormallydopeopleatworkaskmeifI'vebeeneatingthesugaroutofthesugarbowlofcourseineverdothatIjustdrinkcoffeebutIguesssome peopleliketodothatbecauseittastesgoodtheonlyproblemisittakesalotofsugartogiveyouabuzzanditwearsoffprettyquickly.
3. Cocaine-Aparentlycocaineisillegalbecausepeoplegetaddictedtoitanditkillspeoplebutitdidn'treallyhaveamajoreffectonmebecauseitookitduringamajorcaffeinehighsonothingreally happenedthatInoticedifyouwanttouseititsprobablymoreharmfulthancaffeineanditcostsahellofalotofmoneybutwhateveryouknowwhatImean?
4. Taurine-It'slikecaffeineoncocaineormaybemorelikecocaineoncaffeinewhichiskindofironicwhenyouthinkaboutitbuttheystickitinRedBullhencethenameandittasteslikesourgymsocksbut
   DAMNitgetsyougoinginthemorningIoncedrankacanoftaurineandaced4finalexamsinonedaywithoutstudyingforthembecausetaurinemakesyouSMARTandsometimesyoumixitwith
   inositolandglucoseandmethandyougoINSANEliketotatllybatfuckinsaneWAHAHAHAHAHoooooooooooWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEI'mafiremanIalwayswantedtobeafiremanand
   arobotninjakaratepolicemanastronautwhofightscrimeandsavespeoplebutrightnowIhavetogotoworkanddostuffbecausemybossisgettingharassedbyhissuperiorssoweallhavetowork
   overtimewhichiswhyIdrankallthisfreakingRedBullinthefirstplace!

Inshort

SoyeahIguesswhatI'mtryingtosayisthemorecaffeinethebetteryouknowwhatImean?