User:John Lydon/Every RPG Game Ever

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edit ZANADU!

edit A Choose your Adventure game

After finishing off that epic final battle against Sephiroth, you kick back in your chair, content in the knowledge that you are the supreme RPG master. After all, you've conquered all the Final Fantasies, Chrono Trigger, Mass Effect 1&2, and even Baldur's Gate. After a few moments of relaxation, a thought occurs to you; Why does it seem like every RPG follows the same basic plot. "phhssssshhh" you say to yourself, there's no way that can be true. Dragon Warrior was the story of a would be hero knight that is given the task of bringing peace to the land by defeating the evil dragon lord and rescuing the beautiful princess. That's completely different from the story of, say, Diablo, where a lone hero is tasked with defeating the Devil himself in order to bring peace to the land. And both those are leaps and bounds away from the premise of a game like Zelda where a lone boy is forced to become a hero and rescue the princess to bring peace to the la..... "Wait a minute, maybe I'm on to something here!" You jump out of your Laz-E-Boy and dash upstairs to your computer. After masturbating to some really out there Asian animal porn, you head back downstairs to catch the latest episode of Family Guy. Halfway down the stairs, you remember that you were going to research the similarities found in Role Playing Games. Sitting back down at the computer, you log on. What do you do next?

Ittybitty bullet Google "similarities found amongst RPG plots"

Ittybitty bullet Update your Facebook status

Ittybitty bullet Watch some more of that sweet, sweet, Asian animal porn

Ittybitty bullet Fuck it. I'm not missing Family Guy for this!

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