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Latest revision as of 00:17, August 14, 2011

Juno is an adorable little feature film that was written by a porn star named Diablo Cody and stars Ellen Page, Jennifer Garner, that kid from Superbad, and Jason Bateman... bateman, haha, masterbateman! Let's go masturbate with masterbateman! HAHAHA!

Directed by Ivan Reitman
Produced by John Malkovich
Written by That Hooker I slept with
Starring Ellen Page
Jennifer Garner
J. Jonah Jamason
That guy from the West Wing
George Clooney
Sarah Palin
Bristol Palin
Edited by Kevin Smith
Distributed by Fox
Release date(s) When did Bristol become pregnant? It came out a couple of months before then.
Running time 90 minutes
Country USA
Language English
Budget US$1,250,000
Box office $215,000,000 (North America)

edit Story

One day as Juno is peacefully walking home from school, she sees Michael Cera bitching about how awkward he is and how he'll never lose his virginity. Being the slut that she is, Juno fucks him stupid. This is shown very errotically and oh boy is Ellen Page FIHINE!Because Michael Cera was wearing a broken condum, Juno gets pregnant. She decides to give birth to the baby, but give it to Jennifer Garner and Bateman, HAHAHA Bateman!, haha MASTER BATEMAN! HAHA!
Extract vignettes3 v6.jpg

He's definately masterbating here... cause he's Masterbateman!

edit Juno effect

So after everyone saw this film, a bunch of teenage girls decided to get preganant. And not the ones who are slutty. NO! I mean the girls who would normally be seen reading a book and being quiet. The legitamitly hot ones! So they saw this film and got the idea to be like Juno and get pregnant. Most of them got some really desperate guy who was a virgin to do it with them. Unlike Juno though, they kept the baby. Better they do this than bitch about Twilight. The most notable members of this cult are Bristol Palin, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Sandra Bullock.

They wanted to look like this?!

edit Cast

edit Reception

Yeah so Roger Ebert loved this film. So did all of his drones and clones. It was nominated for best picture, but lost to the Coen Brothers brilliant masterpiece that is No Country for Old Men. When Ebert heard this happened, he cried and pooped his pants

edit Juno quotes

  • I'm spllugusing my blagoosing!
  • My ego is prego!
  • My legoging in my degoging!
  • Fago bago!
  • I need to blago nago!
  • Nasto taco gago!

It is apparent that when Diablo Cody was writing the dialogue for Juno, she was high as the girl does not speak english. It is also apparent that Cody has a thing for exclamation points.

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