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Born to a mongoose and a cuttlefish in 2016, Jammers quickly broke out of his Upper-Lower-Middle-Class life and became known as "The World's Most Awesome But Sadly Unrecognised Man".

After a freak electrical storm ripped a hole in reality and sent him to the distant past, 1984, he managed to gain a job in Minitru, found the 'Brotherhood', depose Outer Party Member James Hatfield with charges of cat-rape and initiate a warp-rift that flung him into an alternate reality.

Here, after fighting off numerous strawberry clocks, man-lemmings, flying jellyfish and Swedish, he backed into wall, which turned into a Rancor, threw him at a Bugblatter Beast of Traal and vapourised. The Bugblatter Beast turned into a Grue, but before it could eat him a passing bog-wizard teleported him to another warp-rift.

Here he helped a group of farm animals to overthrow their pseudo-Tsar overlord in return for the DeLorean that had belonged to some old guy and a kid that turned up in a flash of lightning and cheesy special effects. After consuming their steaming flesh, the pigs had kept it in immaculate condition and installed hydraulics, NOS and a Gameboy Colour car charger.

Using the DeLorean he warped back to his own reality just in time to stop the Nazis from gaining Britain by |-|4xx0r1n6 73h R4F to make them "u80r |337 r0f|".

He then flew to 2006 where he stays to this day.

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