User:High Gen. Grue/TYATU/87

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edit Episode 87:Falling demands

(Han is falling from 4000 stories high without a parachute. )

Han: AAAAAAAA!!!

Indy: CONTENTS!

Han: Wait a second...oh right, this is far.

Han: AAAAAAAA!!!

(At the top...)

All except Engelsfair: HAN!!!!!!

Engelsfair: So what? He blew up half of the wall!

Supwealuhop: Prepare the curry powder.

Braycat: Be still, communist. <aims arrow>

(Engelsfair snaps arrow)

Engelsfair: Prepare the Commie Fall Stopper!

Underling: Sir, that only works on communists.

Engelsfair: Right...right...who cares!?!

Emmzed: Pretty much everybody in the group.

Aquarii: I WILL SAVE HIM!

(Aquarii takes a combat knife and sticks it between his teeth and jumps out.)

Keira: Now we have TWO people to save...

Adam: That is just a normal fall stopper.

Nikita: Well, hopefully he will finally use his telekenesis for something useful...

(Flashback to two days ago. Aquarii is near a microwave heating up Macaroni and cheese.)

Aquarii: BOMB!

(Aquarii uses his psychic powers and blows up the microwave. Back to current time.)

Nikita: Yeah right.

Adam: Keira, make that THREE we need to save... <pushes Indy out the hole>

(Priest goes to save Indy by jumping out)

Keira: Four.

(Ronalds and Engelsfair jump to save people)

Adam: Make that five.

Keira: Don't you mean six?

(Braycat and Shandion jump, as well as his dog)

Keira: Oh no... nine.

(A grapple gun's hook holds onto a handrail in the room)

Dizberg: Okay, we need to act fast. Shamus, throw them down a keg. Keira, use Engelsfair's bedsheets to make a rope so they can climb back up.

Shamus: Wouldn't it be smarter to use that grapple cann-

Dizberg: No interruptions! We need to work quickly!

Keira: Whatever. <pulls on grapple wire>

(Aquarii uses his telekinesis to get a snack)

Aquarii: BOMB!

(The snack explodes.)

Aquarii: Damn...

(Keira makes her way down the side of the building.)

Dizberg: What if the wire were to snap?

Shamus: That's a load of-

(Dizberg starts sawing the grapple wire)

Dizberg: This is why you listen to my plans!

Shamus: Sawing the wire won't help.

Dizberg: You're right.

(Dizberg takes Emmzed's axe and starts to chop the wire)

Emmzed: Hey!

Minh: I don't know about you, but I'm going to help those people falling down to their near certain deaths. Foolish Engelsfair. underling!

Underling: Yes?

Minh: Order a trampoline of some sort to be put at the bottom of this building.

(At the side of the building, Han is breaking a window, the others are hanging onto Han's grapple wire)

Indy: Are you sure this will hold?

Han: As long as nobody is sawing the wire, yes, <breaks window>

(The wire is chopped. Han does a cool acrobatic move)

Han: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Everybody on the wire: AYIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

(Meanwhile on the top floor)

Shamus: Now look at what you've gone and did!

(On a lower floor...)

Keira: I need to find a way to get them to safety...

(The broken grapple wire and everyone on it fall down, visible in the window)

Keira: The COMMIE CATCHER!

(Keira activates the COMMIE CATCHER!)

Veitcong: HALT! This room is for commies only! <Vietcong surrounds Keira>

(Keira fires arrows at the three vietcong. A vietcong's radio goes off.)

Minh: You are three are idiots. You don't work for Engelsfair. Stand down or I will personally turn you into a food stamp.

Vietcong: No you won't because WE QUIT SEVERAL WEEKS AGO!

Minh: Damnnit!

(The Commie Catcher catches the group, except for HAN!!!!!)

Han: (Hanging on a ledge) That window looks weak... <smashes window, and jumps inside>.

(Meanwhile on another floor)

Dizberg: We have to reunite with Han.

Indy: Who snapped the wire?

(Everybody that didn't jump points to Dizberg)

Dizberg: Eh heh heh.... uhhhh.... sorry?

(Everybody lunges at Dizberg)

Slipherius von Jämssen: Can I lunge too?

Adam: Who the fuck are you?

Slipherius: I am a German friend of Dizberg! Why are you pounding him?

Braycat: Because he is an idiot.

(Down on a lower floor...)

Keira: Die Vietcong!

(The vietcong who surrounded her are all dead, with arrows in ther chests, Keira heads up the stairs)

Han: Whoever snapped the wire, I'm gonna strangle... <goes up the stairs>

(In the staircase, there is a hole, and Han falls through into a pit of spikes)

Han: (Hanging on to the non-broken staircase) What the- CURSE YOU ENGELSFAIR!

Engelsfair: It is an Anti-Capitalist trap.

Tank Grunt: Can I save Han, dad?

Han: And are the rest of group alive?

Engelsfair: Shandion's dog is dead.

Shandion: GARM II!

Han: As long as everybody else is alive, then that's alright. Also, this is SO easy to get out of.

Engelsfair: Getting out of it is a trap too.

(Han gets out, just to be poisoned with a dart and dropped into a deeper pit)

Han: Is there any reason this dart is covered in water?

Engelsfair: That is not water, but pure communism, which damages capitalists.

Tank: Dad, can I shoot Engelsfair?

Han: (not damaged) Whatever. And there is an elevator out of this pit anyway.

Engelsfair: The elevator is a trap.

Han: Why do you think I haven't entered it?

Engelsfair: Not entering it is a trap too. That entire area is a trap.

(Further down the stairwell, somebody falls into a trap)

Keira: DAMN YOU ENGELSFAIR!

Han: Wait, who screamed "Damn you Engelsfair?"

Engelsfair: A capitalist Indian.

Braycat: Keira!

(Braycat uses a Shoshone chant to fill the pit with water, allowing Keira to escape out of it.)

Aquarii: GET DOWN!

(Aquarii tackles Braycat and Keira, causing them to fall down the staircase, into a trap. The staircase door to the first floor busts open. The Peace Corps, led by Sargent Mhale pour in, and fall into a trap. )

Han: Like Keira said, DAMN YOU ENGELSFAIR!

(Han steps into trap, and is teleported to a top-secret COMMIE hideout)

Han: It's your choice. your friends... or Communi- (is teleported to the hideout three floors down)

(Credits roll)

Watch the next episode...

This script is an episode of

Episodes:

54 - 55 - 56 - 57 - 58 - 59 - 60 - 61 - 62 - 63 - 64 - 65 - 66 - 67 - 69 - 70 - 71 - 72 - 73 - 75 - 76 - 77 - 78 - 79 - 80 - 81 - 82 - 83 - 84 - 85 - 86 - 87 - 88 - 89 - 90 - 91 - 95 - 97 - 100 - 102 - 104 - 105 - 106 - 107 - 108 - 109 - 110

Episode lists and summary - List of characters

Spinoffs:

The TYATU Talk Show!

TYATU Guest Episodes:

NOTE: Guest episodes have absolutely no relavance the the plot of TYATU.

Genesis - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10

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