User:HelloByeBye/2007 Women's Bloodbath World Cup

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
2007 WBA Women's Bloodbath World Cup
2007 Mujeres de la Copa del Mundo de baño de sangre
Teams 24 (from lots of entrants)
Host Spain
Champions Icons-flag-br Brazil
Matches Played Count them yourself
Attendance 60,000,000
Total Deaths ITS OVER 9000!

The 2007 WBA Women's Bloodbath World Cup or in Spain known as the 2007 Mujeres de la Copa del Mundo de baño de sangre was the first Women's Bloodbath Cup. WBA decided they would do it since some women where better then men. They also thought they could make some money off of the idea. I can't finish the article right now, I really can't be arsed.

edit Spain 2007

City Original stadium Host club(s) Capacity
Madrid French Toast Stadium Real Madrid 80,401
Barcelona Camp Nou FC False Madrid 98,772
Valencia Toyota Field Valencia Peesters 55,000
Saragossa Duff Bear Stadium Saragossa Drunken Hobos 34,596
Seville AOL Arena Seville Mafia 51,309
Bilbao Mexican Beer Field Balboa Fans 39,750
Vigo Blockbuster Stadium Vigo's Stupid people 32,500
Valladolid Youtube Poop Field Youtube FC 26,512
Elche Das Arena of Death Your Friends 1,000,000
Gijón Super Porn Magazines Field :D Stadium 555,555
Kabul Taliban Stadium Terrorists FC 25,000
the Moon LOL Stadium Iraq al-Qaeda 1

edit Qualification

edit North America

edit South America

edit Europe

edit Africa

edit Asia

edit Groups

Groups were announced on May 31, 2007. They were chosen completely at random because I said so.

Pot A Pot B Pot C Pot D Pot E Pot F

Icons-flag-us United States
Icons-flag-br Brazil
Icons-flag-se Sweden
Icons-flag-ar Argentina

England flag 1 England
Icons-flag-mx Mexico
Icons-flag-cn China PR
Icons-flag-au Australia

Germany Flag 1 Germany
Icons-flag-ca Canada
Icons-flag-cl Chile
Icons-flag-ie Ireland

Icons-flag-bv Norway
Icons-flag-nl Netherlands
Icons-flag-is Iceland
Icons-flag-es Spain

Icons-flag-ru Russia
Icons-flag-ua Ukraine
Icons-flag-fi Finland
France flag 1 France

Icons-flag-it Italy
Icons-flag-za South Africa
Icons-flag-ng Nigeria
Icons-flag-dk Denmark

edit Group A

Team Pts Pld W D L KF KA KD
Icons-flag-br Brazil 933001711+6
Icons-flag-us United States 6320173+4
Icons-flag-ar Argentina 331021719-2
Icons-flag-se Sweden 030031120-9

All times local (UTC+2)

Thursday 10 September 2007
United States Icons-flag-us 4-2 Icons-flag-se Sweden Madrid
Johnson (3), Shaza 3:00 Shalalarsun, Guto
The States came out on top with a good start to the cup. It featured McDonald's Cheeseburgers and Waterpistols. However was halted by a Homosexual man who was selling Playgirl (pornography for Women and Gay men). However was shot by Guto.
Friday 11 September 2007
Brazil Icons-flag-br 9-6 Icons-flag-ar Argentina Barcelona
Lusita (7), Lucy (2) 10:00 Gonzalez (3), Lopez (3)
In one of the most bloodiest matches in the cup, was a brutal fight between rivals Argentina and Brazil. In 2 Hours it turned from a girl fight to Mortal Kombat. Lucy burned 2 Argentines to the ground, and the fans decided to duke it out, causing lots of fights on the stands. In fact Gonzalez had launched a missile killing 3 Brazilians. Barcelona police had to come to the stands to cool down the fans. Many sodas and Hot Dogs were thrown on to the field. After 10 hours of Death, the Police called the game off. Chief of Barcelona Police Malos Tacos said, "I do not want to see Argentina and Brazil play bloodbath, no matter if it is men or women, it is deadly" he said.
Monday 14 September 2007
Argentina Icons-flag-ar 11-7 Icons-flag-se Sweden Seville
Waniga (4), Palacioso (5), Hot Argentine Chick (2) 8:20 Candy Cane Girl (6), Trosfuller
In a bloody game, Argentina defeated Sweden 11-7. Fans were entertained when a very beautiful Argentine player, nicknamed Hot Argentine Chick, was literally, Hot! Burning 2 Swedes before having to be escorted off the field. She was subbed off for Palacioso, who killed 5 Swedes in a matter of seconds. Sweden really outdid themselves.
Monday 14 September 2007
United States Icons-flag-us 0-1 Icons-flag-br Brazil Bilbao
1:00 Martina
Boring game. Only one kill was actually scored.
Thursday 17 September 2007
Sweden Icons-flag-se 2-7 Icons-flag-br Brazil Saragossa
Forshehella (2) 6:58 Marta (6), Luco
In the 3rd win for Brazil, Brazil defeated Sweden 7-2. Marta and Luco were the killers in the game. Forshehella was a possible comeback for Sweden, but was only 2 kills. Brazil wins.
Thursday 17 September 2007
Argentina Icons-flag-ar 0-3 Icons-flag-us United States Kabul
1:00 Hillary Clinton, Martha Stewart, Michelle Obama
Argentina crashed out of the World Cup after a heavy defeat with America. America simply just killed 3 Argentines, giving them a spot!

edit Group B

Team Pts Pld W D L KF KA KD
England flag 1 England 93300159+6
Icons-flag-mx Mexico 43111158+7
Icons-flag-au Australia 4311141+3
Icons-flag-cn China PR 03003418-14

All times local (UTC+2)

Friday 11 September 2007
England England flag 1 2-1 Icons-flag-au Australia Vigo
Smith, Kelly 1:42 Katherine
Old foes England and Australia were playing each other in Vigo. It was an ok game. Nothing really special. England won the game 2-1 with Smith and Kelly scoring for England. However, Katherine scored for Australia. But not enough to bring them a tie.
Friday 11 September 2006
Mexico Icons-flag-mx 9-2 Icons-flag-cn China PR Madrid
Martinez (3), Sexy Mexican Girl (4), Hernandez (2) 6:00 Nee Da Poo, See Mee Pee
Mexico scored 9 dominating kills kicking-off a good start to the cup. Martinez, Sexy Mexican Girl, and Hernandez all managed to gain some kills for Mexico. Even killing Chinese captain I Amm Faat. Nee Da Poo and See Mee Pee got 2 kills for the Chinese team, but it was too late. Mexico had already got a 9-2 win over China.
Monday 14 September 2007
England England flag 1 6-2 Icons-flag-cn China PR the Moon
Johnson, Sophia (5) 7:54 Suk Ma As (2)
England had defeated China who crashed out of the Cup and England sealing qualification to the next round. Johnson and Sophia had inflicted 6 kills on China. While Suk Ma As tried to give China a comeback. But could not save themselves and crashed out.
Monday 14 September 2007
Australia Icons-flag-au 0-0 Icons-flag-mx Mexico Valencia
Australia and Mexico had scored no kills. The Media reported that both teams were mostly bored. Thats your report people.
Friday 18 September 2007
China PR Icons-flag-cn 0-3 Icons-flag-au Australia Valencia
5:21 Katherine, Cherry, Petrovic
Australia finishes third in the group with a win over China. However were selected for the next round anyways.
Friday 18 September 2007
Mexico Icons-flag-mx 6-7 England flag 1 England Valladolid
Gonzalez, Hernandez, Corral, Hot Mexican Girl, Killer Girl (2) 12:00 Smith (7)
Mexico and England clashed and was a very close game to call but England had won. Simple as that. At least Mexico made it through.

edit Group C

Team Pts Pld W D L KF KA KD
Icons-flag-ca Canada 6312043+1
Germany Flag 1 Germany 6312043+1
Icons-flag-cl Chile 33030550
Icons-flag-ie Ireland 0301279-2

All times local (UTC+2)

Saturday 12 September 2007
Germany Germany Flag 1 2-1 Icons-flag-ie Ireland Gijón
Shocner, Pritz 5:21 McAleese
Germany were playing there first match versus the Republic of Ireland, whom there women's team was less better then the men's team. However, McAleese got 1 kill for the Republic of Ireland, however Shocner and Pritz had scored 2 kills for Germany. Gaining a win for the German team. DEUTSCHLAND!DEUTSCHLAND!DEUTSCHLAND! Oh well, at least the Irish didn't play so bad.
Saturday 12 September 2007
Canada Icons-flag-ca 1-1 Icons-flag-cl Chile Elche
Caitlin 7:40 Bachlet
Canada and Chile played a good match when Caitlin scored a kill for the Canadian team. However Bachlet, one of Chile's best players, killed a 16 year old player named Jen. Scoring the equalizer.
Tuesday 15 September 2007
Chile Icons-flag-cl 4-4 Icons-flag-ie Ireland Madrid
Garcia (3), Bachlet 2:00 McAleese (4)
Ireland got a 4-4 draw with the Chileans. McAleese fired a cannonball at the Chileans making it 4-0. But Garcia scored 3 kills making it Ireland 4-3 Chile. In the dying minutes of the game, Bachlet had scored a sniper kill making the final score 4-4.
Tuesday 15 September 2007
Germany Germany Flag 1 2-2 Icons-flag-ca Canada Barcelona
Pritz (2) 6:54 Frankie (2)
Germany had picked up a draw. Pritz, one of Germany's best players, scored 2 kills on the Canadians. But later, suffered a boo-boo and had to be subbed off the field, meaning Frankie getting a chance to score 2 kills. Giving Canada another shot at this cup. The German Bloodbath Association announced Pritz was going to be okay and playing against Chile.
Sunday 20 September 2007
Chile Icons-flag-cl 0-0 Germany Flag 1 Germany Valencia
After a dumbass at WBA named Typhoon Wipha changed the scheduled matches to Sunday, the Chileans had played a dull game with no kills scored. Though Pritz was fine, Schneider felt a little nausea. Then threw up on the field and having to be escorted and taken to a local hospital. But Chile survived, though 3rd place in the group was randomly chosen to compete in the next round.
Sunday 20 September 2007
Ireland Icons-flag-ie 2-3 Icons-flag-ca Canada Bilbao
Leckster (2) 10:00 Tancredi (3)
The Canadians clinched a spot in the next round as Tancredi helped the Canadians get a 3-2 win over Ireland.

edit Group D

Team Pts Pld W D L KF KA KD
Icons-flag-bv Norway 7321031+2
Icons-flag-es Spain 53120105+5
Icons-flag-is Iceland 43111115+6
Icons-flag-ie Netherlands 03003013-13

All times local (UTC+2)

Saturday 12 September 2007
Norway Icons-flag-bv 1-1 Icons-flag-es Spain Kabul
Nashee 0:40 De la Pena
In a somewhat boring match that only lasted 40 minutes, Norway and Spain tied 1-1. De La Pena scored, but minutes later Nashee scored for Norway. It was a boring match and lacked excitement. Thats why they called it off early.
Saturday 12 September 2007
Netherlands Icons-flag-nl 0-7 Icons-flag-is Iceland Vigo
6:21 Fishy (3), Skelu (3), Own Death
It was a decent game. Iceland had defeated the Dutch team 7 to nothing. Fishy scored 3 kills. Then Skelu made it a 6-0 lead. Finally, a suicide bomber came to the game, killing a Dutch player. It ended Iceland's way, winning the Dutch 7-0.
Tuesday 15 September 2007
Spain Icons-flag-es 5-0 Icons-flag-nl Netherlands Madrid
Garza (penalty), De Los Santos (4) 4:00
The Dutch crashed out of the cup after a heavy defeat to Spain. First, Garza got a clear headshot when she got a penalty. Then, De Los Santos threw a grenade, in the process killing 4 Dutch players. Spain enjoyed another game that got them 3 points. A riot erupted in Amsterdam after the exit of the team.
Tuesday 15 September 2007
Iceland Icons-flag-is '0-1 Icons-flag-bv Norway Barcelona
2:00 Johanson
Norway got a good win defeating rivals Iceland. Johanson got 1 kill in the last minutes of the game, giving Norway there first win in the Cup.
Sunday 20 September 2007
Spain Icons-flag-es 4-4 Icons-flag-is Iceland Valencia
Fernandez (4) 4:00 Your Maid (4)
Typhoon Wipha's mistake also effected the schedule of the game to 20 September 2007. Oh well, onto the report. Spain tied 4-4 with the Iceland team. Iceland got a good start when your cool maid killed 4 Spaniards. Then, Fernandez killed 4 Icelandic players, giving Spain a spot in the cup. Iceland finished 3rd in the group, but randomly chosen to compete in the next round.
Sunday 20 September 2007
Norway Icons-flag-bv 1-0 Icons-flag-nl Netherlands Elche
Svolbird 0:20
In the Norway-Netherlands match, Svolbird had killed a Dutch player in the first 10 minutes of the game. After 20 mInutes, the Dutch squad called the game off and both teams ate at a local Spanish resturant. Though the Norwegians won anyways, the Dutch couldn't care less.

edit Group E

Team Pts Pld W D L KF KA KD
Icons-flag-fi Finland 53120115+6
France flag 1 France 5312021+1
Icons-flag-ru Russia 43030660
Icons-flag-ua Ukraine 0300307-7

All times local (UTC+2)

Tuesday 22 September 2007
Russia Icons-flag-ru 1-1 France flag 1 France Gijon
Andreishan 5:32 Katie
Russia and France were playing against each other both were regional powers. It was a ok game i guess. The report was boring, though.
Tuesday 22 September 2007
Ukraine Icons-flag-ua 0-6 Icons-flag-fi Finland Barcelona
8:55 Johansen (5), Nikki
In a brutal game, Finland defeated Ukraine 6-0. Johansen had scored a hat-trick in 1 hour. 2 Hours later, scored 2 more. Then, in the dying minutes, Nikki scored for the Finnish team. The Ukraine team was embarrassed. It was a good start for Finland though, despite not winning the 2005 Women's Euro.
Wednesday 23 September 2007
Finland Icons-flag-fi 5-5 France flag 1 France Madrid
Nikki (5) 6:00 Royal (5)
This was an OK game. First, Royal launched a missile at 5 Finnish players, Giving France a lead. Nikki reacted by throwing a grenade destroying a cannon and 5 French players. However, a no good Jack Thompson came to the stands, forcing a halt. He was shot by a guard. WBA and gamers were happy he died.
Wednesday 15 September 2007
Russia Icons-flag-ru 0-0 Icons-flag-ua Ukraine Valencia
6:00 Johanson
Ukraine vs Russia was one of the most boring bloodbath games ever played. Everyone fell asleep. Though Shekitiku woke up and brutally murdered a Ukrainian. But Nobody saw and was 0-0. This has not happened since the 2002 Bloodbath World Cup.
Saturday 26 September 2007
Finland Icons-flag-fi 0-0 Icons-flag-ru Russia Bilbao
In a boring game again. Nobody scored. The media reported that the players were so bored they decided to play chess and shit like that. Russia were randomly chosen to go to the next round anyways.
Sunday 27 September 2007
Ukraine Icons-flag-ua 0-1 France flag 1 France Elche
6:20 Bruni
In a okay game, Bruni had scored a kill on Ukraine. Nothing special.
Personal tools