User:Harpman/article

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The Sticky Wicket Theory is the theory of the sun's origins, or orgasms, the book doesn't explain it very well... anyway it is possibly the most disregarded theory ever to be inscribed on a platypus's bill.

edit History

Wicket was born in Gulag, Syrupia. He lived a troubled childhood, some researchers claim it was because there was always too much syrup on his pancakes, making them like sponges, a texture he despised. The most accepted idea is his multiple times of being raped and molested by The Man.

“I never understood why he didn't have a wonderful childhood then...”

edit Development

Once Wicket aged he decided that he would go out in the world and make something of himself. After flunking out of three art schools, he decided against that.

He was awarded the great knighthood for his "service" to the deans of all three colleges... what service he could have performed in their offices twenty minutes a day with the door locked many have pondered...

edit The Theory

At the age of 36, Sir Wicket of Syrupia, wrote his book The Sticky Wicket. It has surpassed every single unpopular chart ever, being the only book to recieve -2 number of sales. It was all based on a abnormally large kitten and its relationship to the sun... Sir Wicket did achieve one thing in the books publication, it was officially awarded The Prestigious Award of Fellow-Authormanship, by specifying the exact type of book that you should not write, unless you want your house to be stormed by a group of vengeful and angry trolls.

edit Summary

Sir Wicket said in his book, that the sun is, in fact, a rather large yellow kitten that absorbed a colossal radiation dose(hence the glow)when it was huffed by LobsterJesus, Mr T, and Chuck Norris all at the same time. Shortly after the book's publication. Sir Wicket locked himself in a metal container and started praying to Gruppa, god of fish licenses and small red, rubber objects.

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