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|On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you.|
Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! Get saved! 03:48, March 15, 2010 (UTC)
Welcome to UnNews, Happytimes/Zzz, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.
I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.
You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.
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- This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Get saved! 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)
- (cur) (prev) 19:13, 16 October 2009 Zim ulator (Talk | contribs) m (4,664 bytes) (?Welcome to UnNews: new section) (undo)