User:Erekrose

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“George Bush doesn't care about Sosi.”
~ Kanye West on Sosi
Psycho mantis

SOSI placed #2 in People Magazine's List of 100 Most Gas Mask-Adorned People

Erekrose is an alias for SOSI. SOSI stands for Special Operations Secret Investigator.

Her official job description is "handling the jobs too sucky for the other operatives".

Alexander Hamilton something something something something.

Early Life

Little is known about SOSI's childhood, even to SOSI herself. She claims, "It's all a blur... I can faintly recall something about angry rabbits, almighty bakas, and poodoo; nothing more. This is all classified, of course."

Recent studies suggest that SOSI was raised by a mysterious figure known as "Coca Cola". No further details exist.

The Middle Years

SOSI's first documented emergence into the world was in 2001. Witnesses stated, "She came out of the library, from the old, dusty reference section that nobody ever uses. It was the first sign of life we'd ever seen in there, so we were momentarily stunned. When we came to our senses, she was already out the door and falling down the steps."

SOSI self-educated herself (supposedly using the "Internets"), but enrolled for formal education at a local college. She majored in History and minored in the Art of the Bitch.

After graduation, she briefly pursued a career as a historical fiction author. An unfortunate incident involving a dysfunctional pen left her with serious injury to her left leg. The leg had to be amputated, and SOSI temporarily replaced it with a wooden stick. This soon revealed itself as a severe fire hazard, and SOSI opted for cyborgdom after losing her third house.

With a new leg and a new outlook on life -- "it sucks" -- SOSI became a freelance operative, taking jobs where she could find them. During this period of her life, she was forced to sell her third pinky toe of her remaining natural foot in order to make enough money for food, water, and stuff she found on eBay. To this day, she claims to regret taking this extreme measure, calling it "the second-worst decision I ever made, the worst being the time I didn't move all ZIG".

Current Employment

In 2004 she was hired by the Council of Chaos, following the disbandment of her previous employer, known only as the "GoCC" (がっく, gock; probably an onomatopoeia for the sound one makes when choking). There are rampant rumours suggesting she does side-work for the Knights of Ownerage (hereby identified as "the KoO"), but none of these have been verified.

Reports say that the KoO do not exist, and neither does the acronym "KoO" and whatever it supposedly stood for. Reports also say that you should forget about the KoO because it is nothing but made-up nonsense. Now shoo.

Off Time

In her free time, SOSI devoutly practices a religion known as Hamiltonia. Nothing is known about this religion, save that it requires the use of many, many 10-dollar-bills. She also takes it upon herself to smite those who abuse grammar with her ultimate weapon: the Grammar Hammer, said to be the sister of Mjolnir, the legendary hammer of Thor.

Despite her dedication to grammar, she refuses to correctly punctuate acronyms. It is said by experts on the subject that she does so "to be difficult".

She has great interest in the arts, including drawing, writing, music, and banana fellatio. She plays several instruments, such as the clarinet, accordion, melodica, harmonica, stylophone, saxomophone, ear drum, thermometer, and CC-brand Gay Gun.

She is also a vegetarian and will kill you with a carrot if you cross her.

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