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Number of people dissatisfied with Empress Satire's sexual performance
“Would you like a cup of hot jones?”
(Professor Farnsworth voice) Good news everyone! Empress Satire is here to fill the void in her pathetic, uneventful life by reading articles and fixing any and all spelling errors.
edit Notable Achievements and Honorable Mentions
- convinced Morgan Freeman to construct additional pylons
- got in one little fight and her mom got scared
- moved in with her aunt and uncle in Bel Air
- stole Nostalgia Critic's virginity (She remembers it so that he doesn't have to.)
- founded her own fast food restaurant with black jack and hookers
- dropped plates on your ass, bitch!
- went to the store
- simply walked into Mordor
- pulled up to the house about 7 or 8, and she yelled to the cabby "AAAAAA!"