User:Elmahnken/Communist Party of the United States of America
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
The Communist Party of the United States of America is a political party made up of people who wish to see the government control all institutions, own their money, and choose their occupation. Jesus wrote the Constitution in order to prevent Communists from taking over America, but they have anyway. Over half of US citizens today are Communists, and we even have our first Communist President. Your next door neighbor may be a Communist, or your boss, or your cat, or even YOU.
edit America as a Communist Country
In America, there are far too many institutions controlled by the government. They include:
- Fire Stations
- Police Stations
- Car Companies
In a true capitalist country, these priveliges have to be earned! People should have to build their own roads to get to work. Can't afford that? Too bad. Policemen and Firemen should make you pay up front for saving your life, or stopping someone from mugging you. If the mugger took your wallet, that's the Free Market speaking.
edit America's Communist Leader
President Obama is evil. He is an secret Nazi Muslim Communist Frenchman who will use the help of Osama bin Laden to destroy America and turn our children into Stalin-loving Commies who want to create a second Cultural Revolution! Do not be fooled by his calm facade, Obama is your enemy!
edit How do we stop Communism?
Only the almighty Glenn Beck can save us from Communism! Glenn Beck, son of the Free Market, born from the virgin Rush Limbaugh, is our savior. It is he who will deliver us from our recession. Just pray to Glenn and he shall answer!