User:Docile hippopotamus/Why?:Be like The Woodburninator (and join his bear army)?
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edit Why? Be like The Woodburninator?
| Why? |
This article is part of Uncyclopedia's Why? series. See more Why's?
“Yeah, I've read some of that guy's stuff. D+, wouldn't read again.”
In the words of the man himself, “Ya Garbage! Do ya hee-a me?! Ya Ain't NUTHIN! Do ya hee-a me?! YA GABAGE!!! YA GABAGE!” Luckily for you, that can change. Read on, and learn why? Become the Woodburninator.
edit But why should I?
Why should you? Why should you!? There are plenty of reasons to be like The Woodburninator. He’s Noob of the Month June 2008, UnBooks Author of the Month April 2009, CUN, and has written around 13 articles of feature article quality! (note: all Woodburninator articles are of VFH quality).
Think of all the things you could learn from being like The Woodburninator. No longer will you suffer from chronic under-mediocrity. You will finally be able to embrace your full potential but only if you become like The Woodburninator.
Besides, why would you want to be you? You’re just some average user. Admit it. You know I’m right.
edit How could The Woodburninator be described in three words?
edit What do people think of The Woodburninator?
All sorts of crazed and non-crazed things! Read on about what other users have said about him:
“Are you saying that you invented The Woodburninator for an article? You monster! You created an artificial life just so it could be exploited in writing?! I can't believe this! Here! In our very own Uncyclopedia! I never would have guessed it myself.
“I think of all people the same way. I'm a misanthrope - I find it saves time.”
“I'll say this, The Woodburninator looks good in a kilt.”
“He looks like a messed up mofo...but a good writer and a swell guy.”
“The Woodburninator eats Japanese people and shits rice. Also, TITS OR GFTO!”
edit If your still not convinced, take a look at these written by The Woodburninator himself
edit Why? Join his lion army
Safety and security.
Ruffles the tiger says so.
edit I’m still not convinced
Our other reasons should convince you.
edit Reason involving intimidation
We know where you live. We will come and get and kitten huff you if you don’t join. Of course our glorious leader would not approve of us doing this, but we like to think its what’s best for everyone.
Let’s think of this as a textbook example:
1. You have a basket with five apples. 2. Ted has a basket with three apples. 3. If Ted puts all of his apples in your basket, how many apples do you now have?
Dude, that lion just popped out of nowhere and mauled your face off! Why didn’t you join the lion army!? Why!?!?!?
edit Miscellaneous reason
edit You know what you must do
Go out and become like The Woodburninator today! And join his lion army!
Do it today! OR ELSE!
The Woodburninator doesn’t want more stalkers. As the Woodburninator said “Now I have another stalker? Hmmmm…I may have to bring out my attack dog soon.” Yes, The Woodburninator has many stalkers. And attack dogs. And dead stalkers.