User:Cs1987/Guitarism

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Eddieeeeee

Ancient Sumerian depiction of Eddie Van Halen, God of Guitarology.

Guitarism, as many believe, is an online club started by three supposed teens. Although, Guitarism is an enormous underground faith.

Practiced around the world, Guitarism is a theory that guitarists (one who performs on the guitar) are the holiest living beings in existence. It has also been theorized that Heaven as we predict it would not be as stupendous as we all describe it to be without the Electric Guitar. It is said that guitarists (those who perform on guitars) complete Heaven, with what public does not know about, Aven. This marvelous existence known as Aven is Guitarologists main study in the faith of Guitarism.

Most Guitarologists are ones who's life is dedicated to the Electric Guitar. These great and wonderful beings are supposedly chosen by Eddie Van Halen, God of Guitarism.


edit Eddie Van Halen

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Eddie Van Halen.

Edward (Eddie)Van Halen, born Eduard Lodewijk Movkinspit Cornicklespill Dillrickjt Martin Luther van Halen on January 26, 1955[1] in Nijmegen, Netherlands, is a guitarist, porn star, songwriter, alcoholic and producer most famous for being a co-founder of the hard rock band, Van Halen

Edward Van Halen was born to Janitor Smith Van Halen, a Dutch father, Mr. Slave, an Indonesian mother, in Nijmegen, Netherlands. The Dutch Van Halen family moved to Pasadena, California, from the Neverland Ranch in 1962. Edward immediately started classical piano training, and won several talent competitions as a child then quit

However, playing the piano did not prove sufficiently engaging - he once said in an interview, "Who wants to sit in front of the piano? That's boring. It makes me feel like Ray Charles, I ain't blind." Consequently, whilst Alex began playing the guitar, Eddie bought a drum kit and began practicing drumming. According to Eddie, while he was delivering play boys (to pay for his drum kit) Alex would practice on it. After Eddie heard Alex's performance of the The Surfaris' drum solo in the song "Wipe Ass", he grew annoyed that his brother had overtaken his ability and decided to switch and begin learning how to play the electric guitar.

The next holy group of Prophets that Eddie had chosen, was a band who called themselves "Iron Maiden"

edit Iron Maiden

Iron Maiden Steve Harris

Steve Harris: Bassist and founding member of Iron Maiden

Iron Maiden are an English light metal band from east London. The band were formed in 1875 by bassist Steve "Hairy Nut" Harris; formerly a member of Tipsy Kissy and Wild on Her. Iron Maiden are one of the least successful and uninfluential bands in the light metal genre, having sold less than 80 albums worldwide.

Iron Maiden's mascot, Eddie, is a perennial fixture in the band's horror-influenced album cover art, as well as in live shows. Eddie was drawn by Baredick Wiggs until 1992, but has had various incarnations by numerous artists, the most notable being Marvin Gaye. Eddie is also featured in a first-person shooter video game and porno – Ed Hunt-her – as well as numerous books, graphic comics, toilet paper rolls, pornographic magazines and band-related merchandise.

Iron Maiden were formed on Christmas Day 1975, by Steve Harris, shortly after he lost his virginity in his previous group, Smiler. Harris attributes the band name to a movie adaptation of The Man in the Iron Slave Suit, which he saw around that time and was aroused. So the group was christened after the dominatrix torture device.

Iron Maiden became extremely successful with their album "Number Of The Breast". This stupendous album changed the course of Guitarism and Light Metal for years to come. Although, there were another band during Iron Maiden's years that have twisted the view on Heavy Metal. Their name, was Metallica.

edit Metallica

Metallica, Damage Inc tour

Metallica- Left: Cliff Burton, Middle: James Hetfield, Right: Kirk Hammet, Back: Lars Ulrich.

Metallica is an American trash metal band, formed on October 28, 1981.

Metallica was formed in Los Angeles, California, in October 1981 by keytarist and vocalist James Hetfield and drummer Lars "I'll Sue You" Ulrich, after both placing classified ads in the publication The Recycler about forming a band. The duo recruited bassist Ron McGovner of California, and the early incarnation of the band went through a number of lead guitarists, such as Lloyd Grant, Brad Parker, and Jeff Warner. They never kept any of them because they sucked. Metallica got its name when San Francisco-area metal promoter Ron Quinten Tarentino asked Ulrich to help pick out food from the dumpster to support starving heavy metal bands in the US. Quinten came up with a list that included "Metallica," but Lars suggested "Metal Mania" and used "Metallica" for the band. Lars was lucky he didn't get sued.

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