User:Crazyswordsman/slashy

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Welcome to Aspiepedia,

the autism-free encyclopedia that Dr. Anonymous Slashy, Ph. D. can edit.
30,887 different problems to whine about

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Today's thing that needs to suffer

Asperger Syndrome (pronounced ASS-burger SIN-drome) is a semi-voluntary behavioural disorder in the guise of a more serious and involuntary neurodevelopmental disability. Statistically it affects an undue number of radio talk show hosts and Hollywood actors, though it has yet to be determined whether the behavior guides ultimate vocation, or whether the condition results from prolonged exposure to ego-stroking. Some theorists believe that the entire Japanese people suffer from Asperger's Syndrome because of their tendency to stay emotionally detached in all situations except seppuku. (more...)

Aspies should all know...

*...that reading this section is a severe waste of time?
*...that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
*...that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?

News to whine about

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On this day...

March 6: Roadkill Appreciation Day (North America & Australia)
Roadkill Appreciation Day
  • 3500 BC - In the first recorded instance of roadkill, Egyptian Pharoah Ramses IV hits a small cat with his chariot.
  • 1869 - The first historical instance of so-called "cannibal roadkill" occurs when a horse-drawn buggy strikes a horse pulling a second buggy.
  • 1934 - Hitler runs over a small ferret in his Volkswagen, precipitating his later invasion of Poland
  • 1962 - Julia Childs releases a groundbreaking roadkill culinary masterpiece titled Treadmarks and Tarragon.
  • 1969 - President Nixon continues the Road Kill bombing over Vietnam.
  • 1990 - Road Kill is offically the new Mystery Meat in School Lunches.
  • 1995 - Steve Ballmer runs over my dog after yelling at the top of his lungs “I'm going to fucking bury that dog. I've done it before and I will do it again. I'm going to Fucking Kill that dog”.
  • 2009 - First human Road Killer has been discovered in Western China. Government official still denies the fact that it was a young Usain Bolt at his best, pwned Tyson Gay.

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