Asperger Syndrome (pronounced ASS-burger SIN-drome) is a semi-voluntary behavioural disorder in the guise of a more serious and involuntary neurodevelopmental disability. Statistically it affects an undue number of radiotalk show hosts and Hollywood actors, though it has yet to be determined whether the behavior guides ultimate vocation, or whether the condition results from prolonged exposure to ego-stroking. Some theorists believe that the entire Japanese people suffer from Asperger's Syndrome because of their tendency to stay emotionally detached in all situations except seppuku. (more...)
2002 - As a special treat, high school pupils in England are allowed to play Kommanden and Konquer, but not Command and Conquer. When pupils discovered the game only existed with a 'C', there was a mass rebellion.
2003 - Sally Webster and Pat Butcher partake in civil partnership
2003 - Rumsfeld attemps to use magic in order to find WMD. Results are not as expected.
2004 - Metropolitian Police release statement condeming Oscar Wilde
2005 - Oscar Wilde wins high court battle with Metropolitian Police. Oscar Wilde spends settlement winnings on Cocaine
2005 - In Soviet Russia, magic kills Snape using YOU!
2006 - Someone will throw another party to commemorate the one-year anniversary of their supreme triumph in having prevented you from attending their party the previous year; this timeyou will be invited
2006 - Dick Chaney made some guy's head disappear. He later claimed that he was trying to make a rabbit come out of his hat but missed.
2006 - A young boy is brutally beaten at school after spelling the word 'Comrade' instead of 'Komrad'