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After her long service on the piddly-diddly department, Claity Odeckenner became an expert on wanking. Ocsar Wilde agrees. She wanks thrice a day. And she doesn't give a fiddlers fart because you're not worth the steam of her piss. And man her piss is steamy.
The honorable Claity Odeckenner, or "The Wanker" as her highly esteemed colleagues would call her, grew up in the small town of Ghettoville. It was a town with only two streets. But with her amazing wanking powers, she was able to erect a whole city (and your penis) with her wanking powers, wanking powers, and wanks.
And, Claity Odeckenner was the first woman to vote. Ever. IN the WHOLE WORLD! Also, she lives in a hyperballic time chamber with her many rodents. Who she wanks with. And sucks on. Together. With the other rodents (Moslty possums) The hyperballic time chamber keeps her in her pristine youth-like condition. She has been 21 her whole life. A life that spans over 50 decades.
When sailing the high seas as a pirate, Claity Odeckenner often enjoyed collecting various hand-crafted peglegs when not wanking. Her current pegleg wardrobe consists of several famous peglegs by such desigers as Dolce and Gabbana, Rembrandt, and Bob the repair man.
Her favorite quote is, "yarr"
Her second-favorite quote is, "indeed"
Her middle name is Hen3ry. The "3" is silent, and she often enjoys hitting people in the night with it. Success.
Somewhat like Santa Clause, but not nearly as pleasant.
She is drop-dead gorgeous. Infact, many are already dead and the numbers are getting higher. Not lower. The main reason for this is her drop-dead gorgeous mustache growing on her mustache. LIke Jafar's. Quite a sight. But gorgeous.
Her favorite cartoon character is Son-of-a-mustachio because she can relate to his pain and suffering so well. Being a mmustache is a tough life.
Claity Odeckenner invented all aphrodisiacs.