User:Cat the Colourful/Polytheism

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Woman walking in Afghanistan

A follower of Polytheism.

"Polytheism" is a belief of polyester wearing gods. It is based on the belief that many, many years ago, the great Poly, Weaver of the Weavers, weved a giant woven world (known as the Porcus Porcus during the Polytheists), then created the Gods to believe in Poly and worship him, and finally he created the human beings to believe and worship the gods.

Polytheism has been severally redirected wrongly to other small religions, such as to Henotheism, belief of gods wearing Shirts with pictures of Hens, and Kathenoism, belief of gods wearing cat fur. This has led to many bloody wars against other religions (and TV Stations), usually ending with the Polytheists losing. This may also explain the low number of the Polytheists.

Polytheists are also known worldwide as complete freaks. They don't eat cow, they believe that if they are good in life they have the chance of reborning as a cow and hey did I mention already that they don't eat cow?


In polytheism, adoring the gods is more important task than living.


Hindu priests

Another lifehelping tradition is that polytheism does not know the word 'fashion'.

In polytheism, polytheists are classified into different 'classes' (Knight, Mage, Priest, Hunter and Sacrificial Lamb) which can be identified by the color of the polytheist's blood. [1] Also, a common tradition is that the most highranked polytheists have the exclusivity to wear old and torn clothes (or, in some cases, not clothes at all), while the poor people have to wear silky and other fancy clothes. This tradition has something to do with the polytheistic view that 'only the rich can be poor' or something similar.

  1. A common yet overly violent way to find out the blood's color is to hammer a nail through the polytheist's forehead and leave it like that. Useful if the color is wanted to be seen again.
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