User:Cat Lover

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(Headquarters of Minitrue: Fix other link)
(The truth is revealed!)
 
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[[Image:Oscar.jpg|thumb|left|200px|That ain't [[Oscar Wilde|Cat Lover]].]] [[Image:Webgrey3.jpg|thumb|right|200px|This ''definetly'' [[This Guy|ain't Cat Lover]].]]
 
[[Image:Oscar.jpg|thumb|left|200px|That ain't [[Oscar Wilde|Cat Lover]].]] [[Image:Webgrey3.jpg|thumb|right|200px|This ''definetly'' [[This Guy|ain't Cat Lover]].]]
   
Cat Lover is one of [[America's Most Unwanted]]. He is the inventer of the HARV and is related to Erwin Rommel. He is the second president of [[Berlinlandstan#Neo-America|Neo-America]]. Many have claimed that he was also the true second leader of [[Berlinlandstan]] and that neither [[Jake Featherston]] nor [[Robert E. Lee]] were ever it's leader. Cat Lover has stated, however, that Lee was, indeed, the third president of [[Berlinlandstan]].
+
Cat Lover is one of [[America's Most Unwanted]]. He is the inventer of the HARV and is the stalker of Erwin Rommel. He is the [[retard|Village idiot]] of [[Berlinlandstan#Neo-America|Neo-America]]. Many have claimed that he was also the true second leader of [[Berlinlandstan]] and that neither [[Jake Featherston]] nor [[Robert E. Lee]] were ever it's leader, but they were wrong. Cat Lover is in fact, none other than the bastard son of [[Adolf Hitler]].
   
 
== Companys/Agencies ==
 
== Companys/Agencies ==
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[[Image:The_late_dentarthurdent.jpg|thumb|left|400px|Closer, but still [[Arthur Dent|not Cat Lover]].]] [[Image:Who_me.jpg|thumb|right|400px|Still [[Kitten_Huffers_Anonymous|not Cat Lover]].]]
 
[[Image:The_late_dentarthurdent.jpg|thumb|left|400px|Closer, but still [[Arthur Dent|not Cat Lover]].]] [[Image:Who_me.jpg|thumb|right|400px|Still [[Kitten_Huffers_Anonymous|not Cat Lover]].]]
   
Cat Lover started a company in 1942-2 (aka. 1940) that worked on developing a device called [[EVASYS]]. It lead to a lot of causilties, and people began to loath him. An increasingly large number of people attempted to assassinate him, so he invented the [[black hole|HARV]], an incredibly dangerous weapon. The company manufactured 10 HARVs before taking them off the market.
+
Cat Lover started a company in 1942-2 (aka. 1940) that worked on developing a device called [[butt plug|EVASYS]]. It lead to a lot of causilties, and people began to loath him. An increasingly large number of people attempted to assassinate him, so he invented the [[black hole|HARV]], an incredibly dangerous weapon. The company manufactured 10 HARVs before taking them off the market.
   
 
==== Re-stealther ====
 
==== Re-stealther ====
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[[Image:MrT.gif|thumb|left|200px|No, that's Mr. T, not Cat Lover; Cat Lover once said, however, that Mr. T wasn't in the secret Headquarters of Minitrue.]]
 
[[Image:MrT.gif|thumb|left|200px|No, that's Mr. T, not Cat Lover; Cat Lover once said, however, that Mr. T wasn't in the secret Headquarters of Minitrue.]]
   
The re-stealther was a device that blocked signals from getting to an EVASYS, meaning you could hide from radar. However, you couldn't see anyone else, either. Eventually, everyone who was annoyed with this glaring fault turned to a life of [[HowTo:Become_a_rapist|crime]]. The fact most of the people became rapists made Cat Lover to create the [[Cat_Lover#The_Counter-Rape_Intelegence_Agency|Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency]].
+
The re-stealthier was a device that blocked signals from getting to an EVASYS, meaning you could hide from radar. However, you couldn't see anyone else, either. Eventually, everyone who was annoyed with this glaring fault turned to a life of [[HowTo:Become_a_rapist|crime]]. The fact most of the people became rapists made Cat Lover to create the [[Cat_Lover#The_Counter-Rape_Intelegence_Agency|Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency]].
   
 
=== The Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency ===
 
=== The Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency ===
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=== Cat Lover <-> Berlinlandstan ===
 
=== Cat Lover <-> Berlinlandstan ===
   
Several people have theorized that Cat Lover was the true second president of Berlinlandstan. After it was found that [[Jake Featherston]] was of no relation to [[Erwin Rommel]], Jake was put on trial. Mysteriously, the charges were dropped. Well, actually, no, not mysteriously; it was [[George S. Patton]] who said that, and the [[You have died|Berlinlandstein]] jurors just mis-understood. Wait, there is no Berlinlandst''ein''.
+
Several people have theorized that Cat Lover was the true second president of Berlinlandstan, but cocaine can make anything [[Dead Rising|ture]]. After it was found that [[Jake Featherston]] was the true son to [[Erwin Rommel]], Cat Lover was put on trial. Mysteriously, the charges were dropped. Well, actually, no, not mysteriously; it was [[George S. Patton]] who said that, and the [[You have died|Berlinlandstein]] jurors just mis-understood. Wait, there is no Berlinlandst''ein''.
   
 
=== The Society Of The Not-Not-Gay Bashers ===
 
=== The Society Of The Not-Not-Gay Bashers ===
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Several people such as [[Rosie O'Donnell]], [[Kitten huffer|Bill Cliton]], and [[Jack Thompson]] have accused Cat Lover of being part of the Not-Not-Gay Bashers Society. They claim that several facts support their claims:
 
Several people such as [[Rosie O'Donnell]], [[Kitten huffer|Bill Cliton]], and [[Jack Thompson]] have accused Cat Lover of being part of the Not-Not-Gay Bashers Society. They claim that several facts support their claims:
   
* Cat Lover doesn't have Crabs
+
* Cat Lover does have Crabs
* Cat Lover isn't gay
+
* Cat Lover is gay
* Cat Lover mysteriously disappears every weekend.
+
* Cat Lover mysteriously disappears every weekend and is found in [[Brokeback Mountain|a certain mountain]].
   
In fact, a trial was held, and was found guilty on 1 count of possession of [[no tea|no crabs]], 1 count of [[no tea|no homosexuality]], and a final count of [[no tea|not being around on Saturday and Sunday]]. He was sentenced to negative 5000 years in jail (aka. [[no tea|no charge]]).
+
In fact, a trial was held, and was found guilty on 1 count of possession of [[pedophile|Spongebob underwear]], 1 count of [[gay|rainbow badges]], and a final count of [[Brokeback Mountain|sleeping with cowboys]]. He was sentenced to life on death row(aka. [[rape|drop'd da soap]]).
   
 
== Goverment Leaks ==
 
== Goverment Leaks ==
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{{Q|I just flew back from a meeting at the Secret Headquarters of Minitrue in Pyongyang, North Korea and boy are my arms tired.|Cat Lover|the secret location of the Secret [[Crimethink|Headquarters of Minitrue]]}}
 
{{Q|I just flew back from a meeting at the Secret Headquarters of Minitrue in Pyongyang, North Korea and boy are my arms tired.|Cat Lover|the secret location of the Secret [[Crimethink|Headquarters of Minitrue]]}}
   
For leaking the location of the secret location of the Secret [[Crimethink|Headquarters of Minitrue]], Cat Lover was highly criticed. In a court trial, he pleaded "Guilty, but unfit to serve time". He was sentenced to negative natural life (aka. [[no tea|no charge.]]).
+
For leaking the location of the secret location of the Secret [[Crimethink|Headquarters of Minitrue]], Cat Lover was highly criticed. In a court trial, he pleaded "Guilty, but unfit to serve time". The judges didn't care and he was sentenced to another life on death row (aka. [[rape|the usual]]).
   
 
=== Secret Neclear Base ===
 
=== Secret Neclear Base ===
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*The design for bullets that break the locks off doors.
 
*The design for bullets that break the locks off doors.
   
However, it was ''Cat Lover's'' [[Secret Nuclear Base]] that he kept in the United States for safe keeping. Infact, it's whole name is ''The Public Base "Secret Nuclear Base,"'' thus making the leak more of an advertisement.
+
However, it was ''Cat Lover's'' [[Gay bar|Secret Nuclear Base]] that he kept in the United States for safe keeping. Infact, it's whole name is ''The Pubic Base "Secret Nuclear Base,"'' thus making the leak more of an advertisement.
   
 
=== American State Prison-Hotels ===
 
=== American State Prison-Hotels ===
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{{Q|I stayed at [an American] state Prison-Hotel last night! |Cat Lover}}
 
{{Q|I stayed at [an American] state Prison-Hotel last night! |Cat Lover}}
   
Cat Lover was sentenced to be hung by [[Jake Featherston]]. However, it was later revealed that it was an American state he was refering to. All charges agains't him were dropped.
+
Cat Lover was sentenced to be hung by [[Jake Featherston]]. Instead, Jake blew his brains out. Cat Lover died instantly.
 
 
{{Q|Did I do good fixing this?|Cat Lover|this page}}
 
{{Q|I thought you said May ''18''.|Cat Lover|this page}}
 

Latest revision as of 18:51, May 21, 2007

Oscar

That ain't Cat Lover.

Webgrey3

This definetly ain't Cat Lover.

Cat Lover is one of America's Most Unwanted. He is the inventer of the HARV and is the stalker of Erwin Rommel. He is the Village idiot of Neo-America. Many have claimed that he was also the true second leader of Berlinlandstan and that neither Jake Featherston nor Robert E. Lee were ever it's leader, but they were wrong. Cat Lover is in fact, none other than the bastard son of Adolf Hitler.

edit Companys/Agencies

edit Commander Industries

The late dentarthurdent

Closer, but still not Cat Lover.

Who me

Still not Cat Lover.

Cat Lover started a company in 1942-2 (aka. 1940) that worked on developing a device called EVASYS. It lead to a lot of causilties, and people began to loath him. An increasingly large number of people attempted to assassinate him, so he invented the HARV, an incredibly dangerous weapon. The company manufactured 10 HARVs before taking them off the market.

edit Re-stealther

MrT

No, that's Mr. T, not Cat Lover; Cat Lover once said, however, that Mr. T wasn't in the secret Headquarters of Minitrue.

The re-stealthier was a device that blocked signals from getting to an EVASYS, meaning you could hide from radar. However, you couldn't see anyone else, either. Eventually, everyone who was annoyed with this glaring fault turned to a life of crime. The fact most of the people became rapists made Cat Lover to create the Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency.

edit The Counter-Rape Intelegence Agency

Main article: Joint efforts between Berlinlandstan and Neo-America

edit Conspiracy Theories

Cat Lover has been suspected to have some role in various conspiracsies.

edit Cat Lover <-> Berlinlandstan

Several people have theorized that Cat Lover was the true second president of Berlinlandstan, but cocaine can make anything ture. After it was found that Jake Featherston was the true son to Erwin Rommel, Cat Lover was put on trial. Mysteriously, the charges were dropped. Well, actually, no, not mysteriously; it was George S. Patton who said that, and the Berlinlandstein jurors just mis-understood. Wait, there is no Berlinlandstein.

edit The Society Of The Not-Not-Gay Bashers

Gay choir

Cat Lover missed that; he said he attended the straight choir that night.

Several people such as Rosie O'Donnell, Bill Cliton, and Jack Thompson have accused Cat Lover of being part of the Not-Not-Gay Bashers Society. They claim that several facts support their claims:

  • Cat Lover does have Crabs
  • Cat Lover is gay
  • Cat Lover mysteriously disappears every weekend and is found in a certain mountain.

In fact, a trial was held, and was found guilty on 1 count of possession of Spongebob underwear, 1 count of rainbow badges, and a final count of sleeping with cowboys. He was sentenced to life on death row(aka. drop'd da soap).

edit Goverment Leaks

edit Headquarters of Minitrue

Ryugyong hotel

Cat Lover once said the Headquarters of Minitrue was in Pyongyang, North Korea.

“I just flew back from a meeting at the Secret Headquarters of Minitrue in Pyongyang, North Korea and boy are my arms tired.”
~ Cat Lover on the secret location of the Secret Headquarters of Minitrue

For leaking the location of the secret location of the Secret Headquarters of Minitrue, Cat Lover was highly criticed. In a court trial, he pleaded "Guilty, but unfit to serve time". The judges didn't care and he was sentenced to another life on death row (aka. the usual).

edit Secret Neclear Base

Not so secret

It's literal name is "Secret Nuclear Base."

“So we just keep going straight to get to the White House. Oh, and to your right is the Secret Nuclear Base.”
~ Cat Lover on the public location of the Secret Nuclear Base

Cat Lover was highly critized by the ACLU for leaking the location of the base, despite the information they themselves leaked to the New York Times that included:

  • The USA's battle plans
  • The USA's designs for the atomic bomb
  • The design for bullets that break the locks off doors.

However, it was Cat Lover's Secret Nuclear Base that he kept in the United States for safe keeping. Infact, it's whole name is The Pubic Base "Secret Nuclear Base," thus making the leak more of an advertisement.

edit American State Prison-Hotels

“I stayed at [an American] state Prison-Hotel last night! ”
~ Cat Lover

Cat Lover was sentenced to be hung by Jake Featherston. Instead, Jake blew his brains out. Cat Lover died instantly.

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