User:Cajek/I Was Once a Man
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Listen well to the story about to be told to you, for you, all of you, may come to the same fate as I. For I was naive and happy once, and never saw my fate walking towards me until it was too late. I may frighten you with my appearance, but let me just say this: my appearance may be extremely, incredibly frightening and interesting, but don't let that fool you... I used to be a man.
edit Long ago
...I was a human male, just like you (unless you're a human female, or an animal that can read). I was just a normal man, doing normal things, beneath the notice of anyone.
edit My story
...involves 50 years of betrayal, revenge, intrigue, racy sex scenes and sword battles on the masts of pirate ships in the moon light. Truly, a story worth writing and reading, it is far more interesting than 60 percent of the other articles on this website. The wizard duels, the armies of ninjas, and the death of the prime minister were all just precursors for the spectacular finish: 100 years in the making, born of whispers and rumors and ending in a nuclear blast and the sinking of several island nations, my story spans lightyears... and all the dreams of mankind.
edit Thank you for listening
Now can you see? Now can you see me for who I really am? I was once a man. But being a goldfish isn't so bad.