User:Bradaphraser/Bitterness

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Electronquartet

The World's Tiniest String Quartet.
Shown under an electron microscope.
Scale is 100 pixels per Ångstrom.
They are playing My Heart Bleeds for You.


Bitterness is a sensation often experienced when you edit a post to something vastly superior to the previous article, only to have it reverted because it totally changed the meaning of said article. While bitterness itself isn't funny, observing someone who is bitter often is, in a "laughing at you and not with you" sort of way. If you diagree with this definition, TOUGH! I got dibs on this subject and can make it about WHATEVER I WANT, DAMN IT! SO F#^@ YOU!

Bitterness sucks. It's, like, dum. I was bitter once, because someone changed my page. I hate you, KP. You suck.

edit Origins

Hi. My name is Bradaphraser, and I'm bitter. I know you have a 12-step program and all, but frankly, I doubt you can help me. You see, this all started long ago....(cue swirly effect)

The first recorded instance of bitterness was experienced when a heretic scribe translated the Hebrew into Aramaic poorly upon the Isrealis return from Babylon. When the other scribes found out, they tore their cloaks with rage. This didn't bother him nearly as much as the heavy stones they flung at his head. As he lay there, bleeding to death, watching his improved version of the Holy Scriptures burn, it is safe to say he probably felt some bitterness. Not like I'm experiencing now, mind you, but pretty bad.

edit Bitterness in Ancient Greece

The Ancient Greeks' bitterness grew from the fact that they weren't all hermaphrodites. At least, that's what we can judge from the words that have survived to present day. Since all bitterness originated from destruction of superior works, it's safe to assume that other works were written, then nuked for no good reason, which led to the bitter works that would later be renamed "tragedy."

edit Bitterness in the Holy Roman Empire

I honestly can't think of any reason anyone would be bitter toward the Catholic Church.

edit Bitterness in the French Revolution

Actually, I can't think of any reason why the peasants would be bitter toward their lords, either...

edit Bitterness in WWII

Hitler felt bitterness toward just about everyone (unjustly, since his writing always sucked), which led to book burnings. This, in turn, led to more bitterness. And thus a vicious cycle led to the Holocaust. (This is probably totally wrong, but right now I just don't CARE!)

edit Bitterness in the Renaissance

Bitterness of truly great works being destroyed led to the great works of art in this period. Da Vinci himself composed a great code which he was to leave for the later generations to discover and find the true meaning behind all things (the answer is, of course, 42), but it was destroyed by the Knights templar, including all the functioning prototypes for his inventions. This led to some bitterness on his part. Oh yeah, you know it had to have.

edit Bitterness Today

Man, I hate all of you right now. I wrote this kickass red-shirt bit and it got reverted. I mean, wtf? If I wasn't so mad, I'd write an article about my feelings. It'd be like EMO, only with more whining. It disgusts me how wiki authors can insist their own works are sacred, but you know what? I've got this one, baby! You're not taking this away from me! HA! I WIN! Because I'm a douchebag. What? Who said that? I didn't say that! Someone is messing with my article!!!! Unprotect this page, or I'll sue!!! Damn you KP!!!! I'll get you, and your little dog too!!!


F@#^ YOU! That's my F@^#*$ article!!! I'll kill you!!!


Hotness This is a vanity page.
This page is a shameless example of egotism and is completely worthless. The author is pretty darn hot, though. You have to admit that.
Personal tools
projects