User:BieberAxeKiller/MySubPage5

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edit Yo Mama Jokes!

edit Yo Mama So Stupid! Jokes



Yo momma so stupid she asked me the number for 911!

Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death!

Yo momma so stupid she blinked and got lost!

Yo momma so stupid that she got run over by a parked car!

Yo momma so stupid that when I told her we needed gas for the car, she farted at the gas tank!

Yo momma so stupid that when she goes to a movie theatre and saw under 18 not admitted, she went home and got 17 of her friends!

Yo momma so stupid she stayed in the grocery store for one day looking at a can of orange juice just because it said concentrate!

Yo momma so stupid she went to an antique store and said what's new!

Yo momma so dumb i told her Christmas was around the corner, and she went looking!

Yo momma so dumb that she tripped over a cordless phone!

Yo momma so dumb that she got smacked by a statue!

Yo momma so dumb she got locked in a toilet and pissed herself!

Yo momma so dumb , I told her she lost her mind, and she started looking for it!

Yo momma so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk!

Yo momma so dumb she got hit by a parked car!

Yo momma so dumb when she went to a football game she thought the quarter back was a refund!

Yo momma so dumb she stole a free sample!

Yo momma so dumb she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer!

Yo momma so dumb she waited all day at a stop sign!

Yo momma so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a mexican phone company!

Yo momma so stupid I asked her to buy me a pare of sneakers and she came back with 2 candy bars!

Yo momma so stupid because it too her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!

Yo momma so stupid when she heard someone say it was chilly outside,she went and grabbed a size 20 bowl!

Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gas money!

Yo momma so stupid when i said drinks are on the house she went and fetched a ladder!

Yo momma so stupid she got locked in Matress World and slepped on the floor!

Yo momma so stupid when she saw the under 17 not admitted sign, she went home and got 16 friends!

Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!

Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!

Yo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!

Yo momma so stupid that she sold the car for gas money!

Yo momma so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911?"!

Yo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!

Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."!

Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out!

Yo momma so dumb she thought the computer screen saver was TV!

Yo momma so dumb that when she jumped out of a window she went up!

Yo momma so dumb she got hit by a parked car!

Yo momma so dumb she heard someone say it was chilli outside so she ran and grabbed a bowl!

Yo momma so dumb she thought a telephone was a phone for the T.V!

Yo momma so dumb she thinks a quarterback is a refund!

Yo momma so dumb she tried to kill herself by jumping out of the basement window!

Yo momma so dumb the computer said press any key to continue and she was looking for the any key!

Yo momma so dumb she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death!

Yo momma so dumb it took her an hour to make minute rice!

Yo momma so dumb she stayed up all night studying for her blood test!

Yo momma so dumb I caught her staring at a piece of paper. She sait it was Pay-Per View!

Yo momma so dumb when your dad suggested doggy style she went out the back and started to lick her balls!

Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread!

Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl!

Yo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners!

Yo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!

Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!

Yo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!

Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!

Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.

Yo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home!

Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead!

Yo momma so stupid she jumped out the window and went up!

Yo momma so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund!

Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain!

Yo momma so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes!

edit Yo Mama So Ugly! Jokes



Yo momma is so ugly her nickname is hairy pooter!

Yo momma is so ugly she uses a line of makeup called "Why Bother"!

Yo momma is so ugly, she went to the bathroom and scared the shit out of the toilet!

Yo momma is so ugly that when she went to rob a bank she didn't have to wear a mask, she just walked up and said "Put the money in the bag"!

Yo momma is so ugly she shaves her pits with a lawn mower!



Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry!

Yo momma so ugly people go as her for Halloween!

Yo momma so ugly she scares the roaches away!

Yo momma so ugly we have to tie a steak around your neck so the dog will play with her!

Yo momma so ugly that yo daddy first met her at the pound!

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."!

Yo momma so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning!

Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Planet of the Apes!

Yo momma so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck!

Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras!

Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!

Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!

edit Yo Mama So Fat! Jokes



Yo momma so fat she took her chin as carry on!

Yo momma so fat she throws up gravy!

Yo momma so fat she plugged the hole in the ozone layer!

Yo momma so fat it's not funny!

Yo momma so fat she ate the milky way!

Yo momma so fat she has to wear a wide load sign!

Yo momma so fat that while she walking to Wal-Mart, she tripped over K-Mart, and landed on Target!

Yo momma so fat the army uses her panties for a parachute!

Yo momma so fat she makes godzilla loox like an action figure!

Yo momma so fat she needs a wide load stiker on her butt!

Yo Momma so fat she can't even float in space!

Yo momma so fat she sat on walmart and lowered the prices!

Yo momma so fat she can go on vacation by rolling over!

Yo momma so fat one time she threw up and out came pinnichio!

Yo momma so fat when she turns around its her birthday again!

Yo momma so fat when she went to Tokyo everyone said its GODZILA!

Yo momma so fat, she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook!

Yo momma so fat the elephant on her shirt is real!

Yo momma so fat when she stepped on a scale it said 1 person at a time please!

Yo momma so fat she pooped out an actionfigure!

Yo momma so fat she tripped over Wal-Mart and landed on Target!

Yo momma so fat that when she walkes she shows up on the rictor scale!

Yo Momma is so fat she steps on a dollar bill and makes change!

Yo momma so fat when i tryed to walk around her i got lost!

Yo momma so fat that when she puts on her red t-shirt she runs through brick walls yelling, "Kool-Aid!"!

Yo momma so fat when she died and went to heaven lord asked "where did my light go?"!

Yo momma so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck!

Yo momma so fat , she uses Mexico as a tanning bed!

Yo momma so fat when she sings theres a earthquake!

Yo momma so fat when she stepped on a scale it said to be continued!

Yo momma so fat that she makes a sumo wresler look like an arexion!

Yo momma so fat that when it rains she where's a yellow jacket and everyone yells taxi!

Yo momma so ugly and fat when she went out side the kids said run its a dinosour!

Yo momma's ass is so big that when she sits down she's three feet taller!

Yo momma so fat...that when god said let there be light...she moved!

Yo momma so fat when she stepped on a scale it read the air heads motto "Out Of Control"!

Yo momma so fat she got stopped at da airport for having 200 pounds of crack!

Yo momma so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Crage is the door!

Yo momma so fat last time she seen 90210 is on the scale!

Yo momma like a brick she is flat on both sides and gets laid by Mexicans!

Yo momma so big when God said let there be light, he asked her to move!

Yo momma so fat, when she walks out of the candy store with a red turtle neck on people start yellin "Kool Aid"!

Yo momma so fat she uses the ocean as a bath tub!

Yo momma so fat when she walked by a construction site they used her as a wrecking ball!

Yo momma so fat when she sat on the toilet she said A B C D E F G get your fat ass of of me!

Yo momma Soooooooo Fat...... A Car Crashed Into Her And She Said, "Who Threw That Rock?!"!

Yo momma so fat that I told her we won the Super Bowl So she walked outside with a spoon!

Yo momma so fat I get lost around here!

Yo momma so fat I shot the bitch and lard came out!

Yo momma so fat she got in a monster truck and made it a lowrider!

Yo momma so fat she tried to take a bath but the water jumped out!

Yo momma so fat that she went to the bathroom and the toilet got the shit scared out of it!

Yo momma so fat when she missed the school bus she yelled "some one catch my twinky"!

Yo momma so fat that your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss he'd have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up!

Yo momma so fat, when she sit's around the house,"she sit's AROUND THE HOUSE"!

Yo momma so fat if I put a firecracker up her ass, and it exploded she would be feeding kids in India for years!

Yo momma so fat she changed the phrase "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"!

Yo momma so fat that when I ran around her I got lost!

Yo momma so fat..she even carried a spoon to the SUPER BOWL!

Yo momma so fat, once she jumped in the water, everone ran out yelling, "Tsunami!"!

Yo momma so fat she plays pool with the planets!

Yo momma so fat she sat down on the bench and her fart went off like a gun shot!

Yo momma so fat she sat on the toliet and the toliet said ABCDEFG GET YOUR FAT ASS OFF ME!

Yo momma so fat her "nickname" is damn!

Yo momma so fat she took her pants to the dry cleaners and the lady said,"we don't do curtains"!

Yo momma so fat she was wearing a yellow shirt and the kids thought she was a school bus!

Yo momma so fat she had cream coming out her arms becuase she ate to many Twinkies!

Yo momma just like a big mac...shes big, fat, and $1.69 on Wednesday!

Yo momma like a big mack, fat, juizy, and only worth a buck!

Yo mommaso fat her stretch marks spell out her name , " big bitch"!

Yo momma so fat, I take her panties and I use it as the main sail of my yacht!

Yo momma so fat, she got more rolls then a pastry truck!

Yo momma so fat the back of her neck looks like a package of hot dogs!

Yo momma so fat.....fat is a complement!

Yo momma so fat when she takes a shower her feet don't get wet!

Yo momma so fat the cows try get milk from her!

Yo momma so fat she puts mayonaise on aspirin!

Yo momma so fat Her high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph!

Yo momma so fat She could sell shade!

Yo momma so fat,that she had to take her passport photo by satellite!

Yo momma so fat that her belt size is the equator!

Yo momma so fat Her blood type is Ragu!

Yo momma so fat When she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate!

Yo momma so fat She can't even jump to a conclusion! so fat she had to iron her clothes on the 405 freeway!

Yo momma so fat, she uses a toilet brush to clean out her belly button!

Yo momma so fat She can't even fit in the chat room!

Yo momma so fat She put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!

Yo momma so fat All the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Momma"!

Yo momma so fat When she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton!

Yo momma so fat she takes showers at car washes!

Yo momma so stupid when she hears thunder she thinks someone is making popcorn!

Yo momma So Fat, She Went To Sizzler and the Bitch Got A group Discount!

Yo momma so fat she has to use hula hoops to hold up her socks!

Yo momma so fat after sex she rolles over and smokes a ham!

Yo momma so fat when she died they didn't use a casket they used a mansion!

Yo momma so fat i put a quarter in her mouth and pushed her belly button and milk dudes fill out of her ass!

Yo momma got so many rolls she puts Brumby's out a business!

Yo momma so fat that when she got into an elevator the doors couldn't close!



Yo momma so fat, she climbed in the Grand Canyon and got stuck!

Yo momma so fat the only time she sees 90210 is on the scale!

Yo momma so fat they could hold the olympics on her left butt cheek!

Yo momma so fat she jumped into the lake and the lake replied "I'll wait my turn."!

Yo momma so fat she filled the bath, got in and all the water poured out!

Yo momma so fat that she became the center of the solar system!

Yo momma so fat that when she jumped, she got stuck in mid-air!

Yo momma so fat when she wore a red shirt all the kids yelled hey kool-aid!

Yo momma so fat that when she sits around the house she sits around the house!

Yo momma so fat that when she steps on a scale it keeps going and going and going...........and going!

Yo momma so fat when she walked past by TV I missed three episodes!

Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale it says I want you weight not your phone number!

Yo momma so fat that the last time she had sex it was at a crispy creme dount shop!

Yo momma so fat she needs a VCR for a pager!

Yo momma so fat the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs!

Yo momma so fat that her belly button makes an echo!

Yo momma so fat her cerial bowl comes with a lifeguard!

Yo momma so fat when she walks past window we lose four days of sun light!

Yo momma so fat she had to get baptised at sea world!

Yo momma so fat when she fell over, she rocked herself to sleep tryin to get back up again!

Yo momma so fat and stupid, when it was raining she used the freeway for a slip and slide!

Yo momma so fat that when the whales saw her they started singing "we are family"!

Yo momma so fat when she goes to a restaurant she has to be greased in and out of the boothes!

Yo momma so fat she was attacked by japenese mlitary, they thought she was godzillas wife!

Yo momma so fat when she went on school feild trips the school had to raise fund to feed her!

Yo momma so fat she makes free willy look like a goldfish!

Yo momma so fat when I layed back on her stomach i rolled twce and I was still in the middle!

Yo momma so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!

Yo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people think she is backing up!

Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise!

Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone!

Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors!

Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world!

Yo momma so fat she lays on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy!

Yo momma so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"!

Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"!

Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint roller!

Yo momma so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets!

Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave., she landed on 12th!

Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too!

Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"!

Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please"!

Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it!

Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued!

Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!

Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!

Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen!

Yo momma so fat she uses entire trees to pick her teeth!

Yo momma so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles!

Yo momma so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl!

Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"!

Yo momma so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!

Yo momma so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks!

Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Car!

Yo momma so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

Yo momma so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!

Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

Yo momma so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!

Yo momma so fat that her senior pictures had to be aerial views!

Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo momma so fat every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!

Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!

Yo momma so fat that she cant tie her own shoes!

Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs!

Yo momma so fat she cant reach her back pocket!

Yo momma so fat slap her on the stomach and you can ride the waves!

Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale it say's I want your weight not your phone number!

Yo momma so fat, she's the reason they invented double doors!

Yo momma so fat she uses I-95 as a slip and slide!

Yo momma so fat she sat on a rainbow and made skittles!

Yo momma so fat when she wore high heels she struck oil!

Yo momma so fat she needs a lifeguard for her ceareal bowl!

Yo momma so fat it took three years for her to get liposuction!

Yo momma so fat she uses buoys for ear plugs!

Yo momma so fat she killed the dinosaurs!

Yo momma so fat she cant jump to conclusions!

Yo momma so fat she uses windex for face cleaner!

Yo momma so fat her genes dont fit her!

edit Yo Mama So Greasy! Jokes



Yo momma so greasy she got a job at the cinema - buttering popcorn with her leg hair!

Yo momma so greasy the chip shop uses her sweat as Deep Fry!

Yo momma so greasy her idea of bottled water is the left over oil slime from a bacon, sausage and egg fry up!

Yo momma so greasy she uses bacon as a band aid!

Yo momma so greasy her freckles slipped off!

Yo momma so greasy she sweats butter, syrup, excretes jam...and has a full time job at the 'Pancake Palace' wiping pancakes across her forhead!

edit Yo Mama So Smelly! Jokes



Yo momma so smelly even sewer rats get out of her way!

Yo momma so smelly that the only dis I'm gonna give her is Disinfectent!

Yo momma so smelly even dogs dont smell her!

Yo momma so smelly she was playin in my Sand Box and the cat came along and buried her!

Yo momma so smelly she made Right Guard go left!

Yo momma so Smelly her poop is glad to escape!

Yo momma house is so dirty before you walk outside you have to wipe your feet!

Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on her bath water!

Yo momma so dirty that Saddam Hussain tried to import her bath water to use as chemical weapons!

Yo momma so dirty that when she went swimming at the beach, she left a ring around the ocean!

Yo momma so dirty the flies on a dog shit passed out!

Yo momma so dirty bigfoot took a photo of her!

edit Yo Mama So Short! Jokes



Yo momma so short she does pull-ups with a staple!

Yo momma so short she gave yo daddy head while standing up!

Yo momma so short she commited suicide by jumping of the curb!

Yo momma so short she jumped in a puddle and drowned!

Yo momma so short she poses for trophies!

Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers license!

Yo momma so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime!

Yo momma so short she can play handball on the curb!

Yo momma so short she does backflips under the bed!

Yo momma so short people mistake her for an end table!

edit Yo Mama Like A...! Jokes



Yo momma like a vacuum cleaner, she sucks, blows, and gets laid in the closet!

Yo momma like a toilet, she's so full of shit!

Yo momma like a hardware store 5 cents a screw!

Yo momma like a squirell, she can't keep nuts out of her mouth!

Yo momma like a buffet, $3.00 and it's all you can eat!

Yo momma like buckleys, she tastes bad but works!

Yo momma like a doorknob everyone gets a turn!

Yo momma like a light switch even a 4 Year old can turn her on!

Yo momma like a refrigerator, every one sticks there meet in her!

Yo momma like a nascar driver she burns fifty rubbers a day!

Yo momma like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow!

Yo momma like a hockey puck everyone gets a whack!

Yo momma like a merry go round everyone gets a spin!

Yo momma like a bus everyone gets a ride!

Yo momma like a boomeramg she keeps coming back for more!

edit Yo Mama So Old! Jokes



Yo momma so old her social security number is 1!

Yo momma so old she flicked the switch when god said let there be light!

Yo momma so old that when she was in school there was no history class!

Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's yearbook!

Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it!

Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince!

Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper!

Yo momma so old she ran track with dinosaurs!

Yo momma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals!

Yo momma so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook!

I asked Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade!

I asked Yo momma so old, her memory is in black and white!

I asked Yo momma so old, I told her to act her age and she died!

I asked Yo momma so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories!

I asked Yo momma so old, she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party!

I asked Yo momma so old, she drove a chariot to high school!

I asked Yo momma so old, she has a Jesus Starter jacket!

I asked Yo momma so old, she has all the apostles in her black book!

I asked Yo momma so old, she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers!

I asked Yo momma so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp!

I asked Yo momma so old, she took her drivers test on a dinosaur!

I asked Yo momma so old, she used to baby-sit Yoda!

I asked Yo momma so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her!

I asked Yo momma so old, she's got hieroglyphics on her driver's license!

I asked Yo momma so old, the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment!

I asked Yo momma so old, when she was young, the Dead Sea was only sick!

I asked Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade!

I asked Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired!

edit The Dirtiest Yo Mama! Jokes



Yo momma pussy is so hairy, when your brother was born he died of rugburn!

I asked Yo momma "what's for lunch" ...She opened up her legs and said tuna surprise!

I asked Yo momma "what's for lunch" ...She opened up her legs and said crabs!

Yo momma like a gun, two cocks and she's loaded!

Yo momma like a vaccum cleaner ... She sucks, blows and gets laid in the closet!

Yo momma like a mosquito, you have to slap her to get her to stop sucking!

edit Miscellaneous Yo Mama! Jokes



Yo momma like a fast food retaurant, she takes orders from the front and the back!

Yo momma teeth are so spaced out it looks like her tongue is in jail!

Yo momma is like Burger King "Have it Your Way"!

Yo momma glasses are so thick she looks at a map and sees people waving!

Yo momma so loose it's like throwing a hotdog down a hallway!

Yo momma has touched more knobs then the gas man!

Yo momma so fat that when God said "let there be light" he told your momma to move her fat ass out of the way!

Yo momma so skinny she has to wipe her butt with dental floss!

Yo momma so greasy that she has to use baccon as a bandaid!



Yo momma so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone!

Yo momma arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear!

Yo momma mouth so big, she speaks in surround sound!

Yo momma teeth are so yellow she spits butter!

Yo momma so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared!

Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Yo momma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed!

Yo momma so greasy companies buy their Oil from her!

Yo momma so flat she's jealous of the wall!

Yo momma so poor she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers!

Yo momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning!

Yo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs!

Yo momma so bald you can see whats on her mind!

edit Yo Mama So Poor! Jokes



Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush!

Yo momma so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway!

Yo momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage."!

Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"!

Yo momma so poor her face is on the front of a food stamp!

Yo momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning!

Yo momma so poor she drives a peanut!

Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk!

Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!

Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving."!



Yo momma so poor she had to fart in her purse to make a scent!

edit Yo Mama So Lazy! Jokes



Yo momma so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote!

Yo momma so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon!

Yo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs!

Yo momma so lazy she pretends to be handicapped to get a good parking spot!

edit Yo Mama So Hairy! Jokes



Yo momma so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!

Yo momma so hairy she look like she got Buckwheat in a headlock!

Yo momma so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!

Yo momma so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan!

Yo momma so hairy, she has afros on her chest!

Yo momma so hairy, she's a stunt double for Chewbacca in Star Wars!

Yo momma so hairy, her breasts look like coconuts!

Yo momma so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker!

Yo momma so hairy, she got a trim and lost 10 pounds!

Yo momma so hairy, her armpits look like she has Don King in a headlock!

Yo momma so hairy, she looks like a Chia pet with a sweater on!

Yo momma so hairy, if I shaved her legs, I could supply wigs for the entire Hair Club for Men!

Yo momma so hairy, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!

Yo momma so hairy, when she goes to the circus the bearded lady protests against non-union workers!

edit Yo Mama So Skinny! Jokes



Yo momma so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio!

Yo momma so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex!

Yo momma so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared!

Yo momma so skinny, when she takes a bath and lets the water out, her toes get caught in the drain!

Yo momma so shinny, she had to stand in the same place twice to cast a shadow!

Yo momma so skinny, you can save her from drowning by tossing her a Cheerio!

Yo momma so skinny, I could blind-fold her with dental floss!

Yo momma so skinny, she can see out the peephole with both eyes!

Yo momma so skinny, she can dodge rain drops!

Yo momma so skinny, if she had dreads I’d grab her by the ankles and use her to mop the floor!

Yo momma so skinny, instead of calling her your parent, you call her transparent!

Yo momma so skinny, her bra fits better backward!

Yo momma so skinny, she swallowed a meatball and thought she was pregnant!

Yo momma so skinny, she uses Chapstick for deodorant!

Yo momma so skinny, she inspires crack whores to diet!

Yo momma so skinny, she has to run around in the shower to get wet!

edit Yo Mama So Bald! Jokes



Yo momma so bald even a wig wouldn't help!

Yo momma so bald you can see whats on her mind!

Yo momma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed!

Yo momma so bald, when she braids her hair, it looks like stitches!

Yo momma so bald, when she puts on a turtle neck she looks like a roll on deodorant!

Yo momma so bald, when she goes to bed, her head slips off the pillow!

Yo momma so bald, you can play airhockey on her head!

Yo momma so bald, she curls her hair with rice!

Yo momma so bald, she needs a weave to make naps!

Yo momma so bald, I can tell fortunes on her head!

Yo momma so bald, I thought she was Mr. Clean!

edit Yo Mama So Dirty! Jokes



Yo momma so dirty she slowed down speed stick!

Yo momma so dirty a family of mice inhabit her belly button!

Yo momma drawers so dirty the roaches check in but they don't check out!

Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater!

Yo momma so dirty she actually repels mosquitoes!

Yo momma so dirty that you can't tell where the dirt stops and she begins!

Yo momma so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!

Yo momma so dirty she made right guard turn left!

Yo momma so dirty she makes mud look clean!

Yo momma so dirty her Sure deodorant is now Confused!

Yo momma so dirty she leaves a ring around the public swimming pool!

Yo momma so dirty skunks give her house a wide berth!

Yo momma so dirty you can tell her age by the rings underneath her armpits!

edit Yo Mama Teeth So Yellow! Jokes



Yo momma teeth so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she spits butter!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, I can't believe its not butter!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she has to brush them with a butter knife!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she can butter a whole loaf of bread!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when she drinks water it turns into lemonade!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she looks like she got a job taste testing butter scotch!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when God said "Let there be light", he told her to smile!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when she closes her mouth her eyes light up!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when she walked into a church, everybody said "I see the light!"!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, crows fly down and pick at them like it was corn!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, Dorothy and Toto thought it was the Yellow Brick Road!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when she smiled, Dorothy made it to OZ!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she's got more gold than Fort Knox!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, you'd think she's been blowin' the Simpsons!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, she looks like she's got a Twinkie in her mouth!

Yo momma teeth so yellow, when she smiles it looks like a Kraft Singles pack!

edit Yo Mama So Black! Jokes



Yo momma so black, when the police shot at her, the bullets came back for flashlights!

Yo momma so black, when she went to night school they marked her as absent!

Yo momma so black, when she goes outside street lights turn on!

Yo momma so black, she can leave fingerprints on charcoal!

Yo momma so black, she got her tattoo done in chalk!

Yo momma so black, that lightening bugs follow her in the daytime!

Yo momma so black, she was riding a motorcycle and got a ticket for tinted windows!

Yo momma so black, when she enters a lit room the clock in it strikes midnight!

Yo momma so black, every time she gets in a car the oil light comes on!

Yo momma so black, she drinks water and pees coffee!

Yo momma so black, if she had a red light she'd be a beeper!

Yo momma so black, that she dresses to a funeral naked!

Yo momma so black her nickname is "Eyes and a Smile"!

Yo momma so black, when she goes outside during the day, the phone rates go down!

Yo momma so black, she got in a jacuzzi and made hot coffee!

Yo momma so black, even her shadow had to get a flashlight to find her in the dark!

Yo momma so black, when she breastfed you, she made chocolate milk!

Yo momma so black, she uses her bath water to dye bowling balls!

Yo momma so black, she jumped into the ocean and people thaught it was an oil spill!

Yo momma so black that when she wears orange lipstick she look like a cheeseburger!

Yo momma so black, I don't know which one's the Shadow!

Yo momma so black, her ass looks like two tires!

Yo momma so black, when she smiles at night she looks like floating Chicklets!

Yo momma so black, when she spits, ink comes out her mouth!

Yo momma so black, she makes asphalt look grey!

Yo momma so black, her middle name is CRAYOLA!

edit Yo Mama So White! Jokes



Yo momma so white, she makes the Pillsbury Doughboy look like a Mexican!

Yo momma so white, she makes Michael Jackson look black!

Yo momma so white, you family wear shades indoors!

Yo momma so white, you never need the light on!

Yo momma so white, she gets a sunburn standing in front of the TV!

Yo momma so white, when she goes jogging at night, there's no need for her to wear anything reflective!

Yo momma so white, she makes Queen look like Queen Latifah!

Yo momma so white, they use her in light houses to guide ships in at night!

Yo momma so white, she gets sunburn from a 40 watt light bulb!

Yo momma so white, when she visited the whitehouse she got lost!

Yo momma so white, when she gets naked, yo daddy's retinas burn!

Yo momma so white, she could go to her wedding naked!

Yo momma so white, she makes Wonder bread look like pumpernickel!

Yo momma so white, snowflakes leave stain marks!

Yo momma so white, her liver spots make her look like bleu cheese!

Yo momma so white, when she ran naked through the snow all I saw were nipples!

Yo momma so white, you don't need a night light

Yo momma so white, albinos worship her!

edit Yo Daddy! Jokes



Yo daddy like cement, takes him two days to get hard!

Yo daddy I saw jacking off into a paper sack, I asked what he was doing, he said packing your lunch!

Yo daddy I called a fag and he hit me with his purse!

Yo daddy so fat, even his dick has rolls!

Yo daddy so stupid, when Yo mama says "Fuck me silly and make it hurt!" he puts on a clown suit and hits her with a brick before he does her!

Yo daddy so stupid, he has to unzip his pants to count to 11!

Yo daddy dick is so small, he makes yo mama look hung!

Yo daddy dick is so small, he pisses on his nuts!

Yo daddy dick is so small, he'd been fucking yo mama for an hour and she asked if it was in yet!

Yo daddy so ugly, he couldn't get laid in a monkey whore house with a bag of bannanas!

Yo daddy so ugly, his own hand turns him down!

Yo daddy so ugly that's not a receding hair line, that's his hair running away from his face!

Yo daddy has to stick his dick in the freezer to get hard!

Yo daddy suffers from dick-do disease... His stomach hangs out farther than his dick do!

Yo daddy so stupid, he brought his fishing rod to Sea World!

Yo daddy like an arcade game, give him a quarter and you can play with his joystick!

Yo daddy so stupid, when yo mama says "Give me ten inches and make it hurt!" he has to fuck her three times and put a vice grip on her head... and yo mama likes that!

Yo daddy so bald, I used his head as a mirror!

Yo daddy so stupid, I told him if he can guess how many dollars are in my pocket I will give him both of them and he said three!

Yo daddy so fat, he put a blanket over the ocean and called it his water bed!

Yo daddy so stupid, he tried to throw a rock at the ground and he missed!

Yo daddy so dumb, he went to the bulls game and said which one am I riding?!



Yo daddy so fat, his parents had to take him to the Pacific ocean to get him baptized!

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